How much stress is too much?

[pacha]

God, I feel like all I do on here is moan...(sorry girlies). I s'pose I have been quite lucky and over the years havent found myself stressed out too often. To cut a long very short the last month has been so stressful...unplanned pregnancy which took me a good long emotional time to get my head around, mother who I havent seen in over 10 years comes out the woodwork and wants to be part of mine and baby's life, in turn her mother (my gran) who I havent heard from in around 11 years has written me a big letter about how excited she is to be a great-gran..please you've had 11 years to write me a letter and do so now because you want something...my OH has been away for nearly 4 months training (home sat/sun) so have pretty much been on my own with all this going on, we've also recently bought a new home and I've had to deal with so many dramas involving the house whilst he's been away including burst pipes, ceiling coming in etc etc and today my poor grampa dies

I am now concerned that I just cant take anymore and am worried what effect all this will be having on bubs. My question is..how much stress is too much during pregnancy?? xx

 

[SoonToBeMrs]

Oh hun..

I'm so sorry to hear about all this.. you certainly don't deserve all this crap.. not now.. you're growing your own little mini-you and it's hard work!

Sorry to hear about your grampa.. I'm sure he's proud of you though and just wants for you not to worry about things.. he would want you to be stress-free.. and laughing about all the silly mis-haps.. especially when your OH gets home.. just laugh about all the things that are going wrong.. even if they're not funny.. laughing will make you feel better.

Try to stay relaxed.. do all the things you would normally do that help you to relax.. don't worry about feeling lazy if the dishes dont get done or you have a huge pile of washing.. it'll get done.. but you and baby are important and you need to de-stress before you burst a vein!

Doing it all on your own can be tough.. but I'm sure your OH would be there for you if he could. I find that keeping a pregnancy diary really helps me combat stress.. and I can look back on it and laugh.

Take each thing one at a time and remember, if you're feeling stressed then baby will feel it too so try some deep breathing and finding those things that help you relax (having a pyjama day.. watching repeats of Friends.. herbal tea.. nice long soak in the bath.. a good book.. meditation.. long chat on the phone with OH or a good mate)

Hope you feel better soon

 

[pacha]

SoonToBeMrs - thanks so much for your reply, honestly made me feel better. You're right I need to stay positive and this is actually OH's last week of training..cant wait to have him home, things will be loads better when he's back.

 

[allycat]

Awww I really don't know what to say. Sounds like you're having a really tough time and to be on your own all week probably doesn't help either... sorry to hear about your grandpa as well

I don't know what to suggest except maybe find ways to relax when you're at home like listening to some good tunes that remind you of nights out, getting into a TV series you can watch on demand/online, reading baby magazines on the sofa with your feet up.

xxx

 

[Mummy Rich]

ah hun

I dunno how much is too much and I understand about the getting your head around it type of thing but I am sure bubs is fine.

xxxx

Take care of yourself! xx

 

[Mama 2 Be]

You poor thing I'm so sorry about your Grampa

Forget the Mum and Nan thing for the moment you haven't got to decide right away if you want to be in contact with them. It took them 11 years to get in contact another few months isn't going to hurt them. Even then you do what you think is best for you and your family.

OH will be home very soon so just keep hold of that and talk EVERYTHING through with him properly when he's back. A problem shared and all that . .

In the meantime please try and relax a wee bit, and don't worry about Bubba, that's probably making you worry more.

Hope everything seems better soon

 

[pacha]

Thanks Mama 2 Be - you girls always seem to make so much sense..apart from the gerkin chat

Your right about a few months not making a difference, the second email I received from her asked if I had thought about what I wanted her to buy me i.e pram etc..my head went to mush..the last thing I want is for her to buy me anything. I politely replied asking that she backed off a little to which I received a gut wrenching..'ive missed you every day email' which made me feel super guilty - Im going to try and put it all on the back burner for a couple of months till I sort myseld out

 

[Mama 2 Be]

Thanks Mama 2 Be - you girls always seem to make so much sense..apart from the gerkin chat

Your right about a few months not making a difference, the second email I received from her asked if I had thought about what I wanted her to buy me i.e pram etc..my head went to mush..the last thing I want is for her to buy me anything. I politely replied asking that she backed off a little to which I received a gut wrenching..'ive missed you every day email' which made me feel super guilty - Im going to try and put it all on the back burner for a couple of months till I sort myseld out

Oi missy them sandwiches were yummy!

Reply to the email if you want saying you are busy right now and need time to think and that they need to back off until you contact them. Obviously I don't know what happened but don't let anyone push you or guilt trip into making a decision.

 

[Loulabele]

Aww thats terrible - i bet u do feel rotten now and with plenty of reason - ur feelings are probably exaggerated now as your OH isn't there to console u or talk and hug u which would help a great deal - i think when he gets bak that u'l be able to handle everything much better as you'll be able to get everything off ur chest - plus the company is a big thing too and the feeling that you're missing him - focus on him coming home - and hey tomorrow is friday - leave all that other stuff behind for now xx

Go get a nice blow dry or something - have ur nails done - that always cheers me up when i get pampered

Oh and sad news about ur grandpa - Keep ur head up anyhow