Good response to "any more news on your due date?"

[Small Flower]

Hey girls,

Feeling a bit down today (see other thread), due to go to step kids judo competition at 4pm and OH ex-wife will be there - she is a total control freak to the stage where she's trying to plan/guess my due date so that she can arrange her life and when to collect kids.

She's continually asking OH any more news on my due date, even tho she has had 2 x kids herself and obv knows that due date is a guide - anyway I'm finding her control issues a bit annoying lately (anything from her hassling OH about haircuts and various other non-issues - she's a bored housewife and has her life planned out to the minute, to the point where she gets 'stressed' at last minute or last week changes to planned schedules).

Anyway what can I say as a suitable response when she asks me for the millionth time "so anymore news on your due date" I'd need something that would really wind her up - I"m in that mood at the mo - and feeling a bit hormonal so need sumat to feel better so I don't either burst into tears or get really irate about her asking!

 

[Sandi4Paul]

tell her it's now christmas day.

sandi

 

[Jade&Evie]

tell her you've had the baby but you've decided to stay indoors and not let anyone see it 'til OK and Hello have finished their bidding war.

 

[Small Flower]

Lol - your replies have made me laugh!!!!

Unfortunately she doesn't have much of a sense of humour!

 

[hennaly]

just say 'yes thanks you will know when it arrives!!'

 

[dannii87]

Oooh dear...

You could try either of these in response to "any news about your due date?"

"It's the same as it's been for the last 33 weeks and 5 days"

"Baby is due on 'x' at 3:31am... I'll have used gas & air, had 4 stitches, tried the birthing pool and he will weigh 8lb 1oz. If you need any more info, let me know"

"Oh, sorry, I'm slightly confused you see as I thought you'd already had 2 children and I just assumed you'd have known that you CAN'T PLAN A BIRTH!"

"Keep checking my Facebook status"

"I'll ask my secretary and PA to let you know"

"Oh you'll know when we can't afford the maintenance that week"

Can't think of any more!! x