Good come-backs to a put-down?

[little*red]

Has any one had a really witty and fast comeback to a put-down or a cheesy chat-up line? You know the type you wish you had said when you think about the situation a few hours later, but were quick enough to say at the time?
Im bored and need a laugh!

 

[budge]

i don't know. i am quite quick witted but its hard to pin point any momentous time.
my DH is really quick at shooting someone down. Better than i am.

 

[monster_munch]

I'm rubbish.

I always sit there 30 mins later and think 'bugger I could have said "blah blah blah" etc.

I can think of good come backs it just takes a while!!!

 

[x-kirsty-x]

I'm rubbish.

I always sit there 30 mins later and think 'bugger I could have said "blah blah blah" etc.

I can think of good come backs it just takes a while!!!

Me too! Why does that always happen?!

 

[monster_munch]

I hated it at school.

I would always be "yeah...... well........................... whatever!" and then get laughed at

Would be sat in maths thinking - I should have called her a minger

 

[Foxxi]

This guy came over to me in a club he was with a couple of mates ...he was clearly older than me...and real cheesy...

He came over ..leant on the bar at the side of me and asked...'where've you been all my life'... I replied..'I wasnt born for half of it'

and then just walked off.... his mates where pissing themselves laughing..my mate was gobsmacked!

 

[x-kirsty-x]

This guy came over to me in a club he was with a couple of mates ...he was clearly older than me...and real cheesy...

He came over ..leant on the bar at the side of me and asked...'where've you been all my life'... I replied..'I wasnt born for half of it'

and then just walked off.... his mates where p*ssing themselves laughing..my mate was gobsmacked!

 

[Tasha20]

To cheesy comments I use sarcasim, my mum is terrible for it.

 

[kimmumof2]

my mum told me one for the bullies when i was a kid cus they called me fat she sed tell them you can lose weight but they will always be ugly. it worked everyone laughed and she didnt open her mouth again!!

xxxxx

 

[Urchin]

It totally depends on what the chat-up line is.

I tend to take what they said and turn it around on them to humiliate them in front of their mates.

 

[mrs_tommo22]

Im a proud sponser of sarcasam and have a few put downs for different situations.
Though sarcasam is alwasy devastatingly on the ball and embarrasses the hell out of the person your doing it too

 

[Marymary]

A great one for a girl who makes u feel bad- you know the type- is by next time ur all out and she's all tarted up say

"Ohhh I really like ur dress"

She says "oh yeah? Thanks"

You say "Yeah, I tried it on actually, looked really slutty on me- suits you though"

 

[glitzyglamgirl]

A great one for a girl who makes u feel bad- you know the type- is by next time ur all out and she's all tarted up say

"Ohhh I really like ur dress"

She says "oh yeah? Thanks"

You say "Yeah, I tried it on actually, looked really slutty on me- suits you though"

haha thats great

Reminds me of one of my classics, (I can be quite witty sometimes honest lol) this girl was really annoying me, I was out with a bunch of work mates and she was the friend of someone else and Id never met her before, but she seemed to take an instant dislike to me, talking over me, sniggering at everything I said, anyway she started to tell us all about this plumber she was seeing, and she had dumped a builder for him. I said "Gives a whole new meaning to tradesmans entrance eh!" to which she went bright red and everyone fell about laughing, she was much nicer to me after that

When sleazy men used to chat me up in clubs and they would ask my name, I would always put on a really common thick voice and say "my mates call me fanny haddock innit, dunno why" it soon put them off hehe.

 

[Foxxi]

I told a guy once that I was called Donna Kebab.... and the div believed me!

 

[Kimbo]

i was at shanes brothers wedding about 2 years ago, and this girl was there who id never seen before..

ya know the perfect type... blonde slim and really pretty, and back at the house for the buffet she was moaning about the way she looked.

she was sayin oh i need my hair doing, my eyes need to be bigger, i need to lose weight....
and i could see everyone was getting miffed off because to be honest she was perfect in every way... not an inch of fat on her and she was wearing this red silk dress.

she grabbed some none existent fat on her belly and said i really need to lose a couple of pounds.... and id had enough so i said, u need to lose ur ego more like!

everyone looked at me like this and so did she!! she shut up after that

 

[Babylicious]

I'm vert whitty and great with the one liners

 

[Kylie1007]

I have a pretty horrid boy in my class at school and he thinks it's clever to do that whole "Bovvered ....whatever" thing. I'd love to think of a smart comment.
Yes... i know it's immature and unprofessional but still...grrr it drives me mad!

 

[glitzyglamgirl]

I have a pretty horrid boy in my class at school and he thinks it's clever to do that whole "Bovvered ....whatever" thing. I'd love to think of a smart comment.
Yes... i know it's immature and unprofessional but still...grrr it drives me mad!

when I get people talking to me like that, usually on MMOS's, I ask them in perfect english to explain what they mean, like "What does bovvered mean? I know bothered, but whats bovvered?" they usually try and explain but make themselves look like idiots other than me lol