Feeling lonely :(

[Bee7]

Sorry for the negative post girlies, just feeling a little low today and as ever, i know that i can come here for a moan (although i literally feel like moaning is all i do lately!)

I just feel a bit alone at the moment. My relationship with my OH is still a little rocky although we are getting on better lately. But we still don't live together (will be looking for somewhere nearer to the time when baby is due if all goes to plan between us) so i don't get to see him much. My parents are very supportive of the pregnancy so i guess i'm lucky there.

I think it's just my friends that make me feel a little alone. I'm the first one out of quite a large group of girls to get pregnant and they just really do not understand. I've already mentioned the 'milking it' comment one of them made when i said i was tired. They also keep talking about nights out/holidays and acting as though i can still be part of it. They don't realise that i have neither the time, energy, money or desire to do any of these things. A group of them are planning their summer holiday next year and they actually think i can go! I was like 'erm what' and they said 'well it's ok you'll have had the baby by then' as though i can go swanning off an leave a 1 month old baby while i have a girly holiday! I really don't want to fall out with them and i hope that i will still be able to do things like that later on, but i'm really losing patience with their lack of understanding. It's not just social things, i get the impression that they really think i've screwed up my life by getting pregnant and their judgements annoy me.

If i can't talk to them without feeling judged i really don't know who i can talk to. I guess at the back of my mind i'm feeling a little left out and jealous too, although obviously that sounds really horrible and selfish towards baba. I'm just glad i have my family and my OH (when he's behaving!) Mehhh just feel a little low xxx

 

[kedi376]

Hey hun, sorry you're feeling so down about things, it's a lot to take in for you and the people around you. Can you talk to some of your friends about how you feel? You say it's a large group, are you closer with some than others?

 

[daniph1]

Darling, u have us!!!! U know what its like, until u were expecting probably didn't think to much about those who were! I know before I had my little girl I didn't! When ur lonely, come to us!!! We have all been there. I feel lonely, husband is wrking all hours god sends, as am I and we r like ship in the night!!!! It will get better! Xxx

 

[hellyH]

Hi Bee, so sorry to hear that you are feeling low, but I do understand, you are entering a whole new time in your life and your friends aren't there yet. One thing I know for sure is that when you become a mum it will open up a whole new world of new friends who are mums too, in your local area there will be anti natal groups and when you have had the baba, you will find lots of new mums at things like surestart centre's who are desperate to meet new friends and become involved in a support network, I have way more friends now than before I had kids and we really rely on each other. I'm not saying that you should stop seeing your current friends or anything, but if they really aren't being supportive and you do find yourself drifting apart from them, then know that you will meet new ones.
In the meantime whatever happens, you can rely on us, pregnancy is hard and you are more than entitled to complain about tiredness/sickness/back ache/ worries whatever you want to, we are right there with you and understand, don't forget your mum will always be good for a good cry or cuddle too

xxxx

 

[Applecider]

Hey Hun hope u feeling better I think we all feeling like this at one time or another! I have to say I've bn spending lots of time with my family ad they make me feel happy! They are so excited like ur family and their positivity makes me smile! Maybe Try n get ur friends involved so that they feel part of it? Asking them
To get fit with u after the baby? Look at cute baby clothes?

Hope it all works out for u xx

 

[Bee7]

Thanks for your kind words ladies, really means a lot to know that i can come here and vent and that people understand. I guess i didn't really pay any attention to pregnant people before i got pregnant myself, it's not like i'm expecting special treatment or anything, just some basic understanding would be nice.

Ah well, hope i get to meet some new friends like you lovely ladies in my antenatal classes etc xxxxxxxx

 

[lells18]

I have felt the same for the last couple of weeks. My OH has been good but just feel at the moment that I am alone in this and feel a huge responsiblity. I am hoping it will pass soon and I am trying not to stress too much so as not to harm the little one in anyway. The other ladies are right though, I have one friend who is a god send and once I told her how i really felt she was fantastic. It really only takes one to give you that boost.
I hope everything goes well for you and if you ever need a rant please feel free! Good luck. xxx

 

[luluB]

Aw huni sorry to hear you are feeling so down. Some of it might be down to your hormones. Although your friends don't seem to be very understanding at all, try not to stress out over them come on here and get support through people going through the same things, and when the baby is born you will find that actually there are way more important things in life and probably won't care about their behaviour. And hopefully soon they'll start to share in the joy that is bringing a new life into the world.
I've just read my post and i wish i could take my own advice as its too easy to dish out. I've felt very lonely and spend some of most days in tears but i try to blame it on my hormones and just let myself have a good cry. You're allowed to feel a little low but think of how you will feel when you have a little baby in your arms, hopefully a lot brighter.
You're in the right place here hun, we're all here for you xxx