Erection problems (husband) after 2 years TTC

[Deanie]

Hi everyone,

New to site- apologies for trying to embed this into other people's threads- have never done this before. Thought it more appropriate to start new thread....

Has anyone had experience of their partner feeling the strain of TTC resulting in erection problems? We have been TTC for 2 years now. I had a laparoscopy (endometriosis) earlier this year and am now on second cycle of clomid. The problem started when I was due for a post coital test in the first month. He became really anxious and felt the need to 'perform'. This happened again for 2nd PCT and not is continuing to impact. Am getting worried and not sure how best to support him.

Any help would be gratefully received.

 

[lisey]

My OH has had a few occasions where he has got performance anxiety with ttc. If I got stressed and annoyed, it made it worse. So when it has happened, I say its fine, we will try tomorrow etc and that's stops him being too stressed and pressured with it. I also don't speak about ttc around ov time or speak about opks etc. He has figured out when the fertile time is now but not speaking about it, makes it less of an issue x

 

[Deanie]

Thank you for your reply lisey. I think you're right and that the best way forward is to stop making such an issue of it each month. It's hard as we are usually so close and he's the first person I chat things through with- it's a lonely thing to go through without support. Nice to have this group though. Thanks again.

 

[lisey]

Just come along and vent to all of us instead There is always someone on here who has been through similar so always someone ready to help x

 

[Dee28]

My hubby has problems in this area, not related to ttc as it's always been a problem but it's definitely worse now we're ttc. He's been prescribed Viagra so getting it up isn't the problem but finishing the job is, about 80% of the time he can't se the deal. This was hell the first few months trying until we discovered softcups, so now if he can't finish he does it himself into the softcup and I pop it in, not very glamorous but it has taken the pressure off as we know we can resort to that if need be xx

 

[Deanie]

Hi Dee, thanks for sharing your experience- sounds like you've had a rough time of it but glad to hear you've found some ways around things. I've never heard of soft cups- will look into it. I'm hoping this will be a blip but his anxiety has set in to point of him not wanting to try today (at peak ovulation!). Our fertility clinic has arranged an appt for us to see a counselor next week so hopefully they will make some useful suggestions too. So hard to get balance right between listening to and addressing difficulties without making too much of a big deal of them and making them worse x

 

[Dee28]

It's so hard when ttc I hope the counsellor helps a bit. Do google softcups, they are essentially a tampon/ sanitary towel alternative and are found in that aisle (large boots stores sell them and they're pretty cheap) and lots of people use them successfully either after dtd to keep the swimmers up there (and getting rid of wet patch!), or to use like I often do as an insemination of sorts. Good luck xx