Dont know what to do

[ema-lou24]

i have been with my partner for a year now and recently moved in together, he gave up everything to move with me as i have a son from previous relationship.

he recently lost his job so has been looking into starting up on his own and i have tried to support him as much as i can, he does a local delivery service at nights just for the extra money, which is fine.

well we decided we want to try for a baby (i have health issues so not sure how long i have till i need a hysterectomy)

but lately we have been bickering at eachother, im a very paranoid person and have very bad trust issues, but he knows all about this and is always so supposrtive of my insecurities etc.

but lately ive noticed hes texting my friend gillian (who works in the local delivery place too and is his best friends OH) just general, r u working 2night etc. but also feels like he looks 4ward going to work cos shes there, also he wanted to take dog a walk to the delivery place to talk prices then i was like that will take u ages so he was like i wont go then, quite huffy 2ward me, saying he was waiting 4 tam to txt him to arrange to meet him at the delivery place to talk prices, so i said "u were gonna walk all way down there without tam even texting u?"

he didnt go, but am i just being suspicious? i dont wanna push him away, i love him to bits, but i cant help but feel paranoid. once bitten twice shy i suppose

thanks 4 taking time to read, hope it makes sence

 

[Mervs Mum]

Have you talked to him about how you feel hun?

 

[Terrie]

i cant tell you what to do hun but i can say that i text OHs friends a lot and he speaks to my friends on fbook.. and i dont think its a big deal?

like my best friend was out drinking on saturday.. colin went out with his friends and i stayed at home. on sunday colin was telling me how he spent most of the evening with my friend. *shrug* doesnt bother me because i trust him and her both. if he had made a move on her she probably would have shot him!

 

[ema-lou24]

i have he says im just being paranoid and that hes only got ema-louise blinkers on lol

my ex partner has cheated, beat me and slept with close friends and family all behind my back!

i think im feeling like this cos she is a pretty girl and just found out shes 6weeks pregnant, something that i dont know if i can give him.

plus i dont know her that well, so the trust isnt really there.

he knows he will loose everything if he was to do anything, but that didnt exactly stop my ex when he had his 2year old son at home waiting for him.

before he met me there was rumours he was "seeing" his other best mates OH. but was never confimed

 

[Mamafy]

I think hun giving your past you're bound to be weary. Maybe he just wanted to go out? Maybe you shouldn't have stopped him?

Not meaning that nastily but if anyone tried to stop me going somewhere a) I'd think they didn't trust me and b) sod this and tbh I'd have been quite huffy too.

Trust is earned but he hasn't broke your trust as yet so until he does I'd loosen the leash, chances are this girl is very happy with her current oh and a new baby to come. Maybe you should try and get to know her?

 

[ema-lou24]

that mustve sounded terrible lol

he isnt on a leash, i do trust him alot more than i have trusted any other man, just some little things pop into my head and once there in there, there not 4 disappearing lol.

and to be fair it was 7pm at night, our dog is 10 weeks old and he wanted to take it a 4 mile walk! he wouldve been ages lol x

(sorry if any of this comes across at bitchy, its not meaning too)

 

[Mamafy]

Sorry hun, I'm known for being abrupt (you'll get used to it )

I just think if you let a man think he can go wherever he wants whenever he wants he'll be more inclined to not want to go anywhere

You're bound to be weary but he does sound like your his number 1

 

[ema-lou24]

i know hes my number 1!

never been this happy b4, just dont wanna loose that.

i know u werent being abrupt hun lol, im the same, things come across the wrong way, but dont mean them 2 lol x

 

[Mamafy]

Awww hun it sounds like you've got a great thing going on

 

[ema-lou24]

i hope so lol

i just get so paranoid and think he would rather spend time there (with her) than me x

 

[luvbunsazzle]

Im sure he doesnt, our minds can be a vicious tool if we let them waunder...

 

[Caitlyns Mummy x]

Don't drive yourself crazy x

 

[Lee-Anne]

Sorry hun, I'm known for being abrupt (you'll get used to it )

I just think if you let a man think he can go wherever he wants whenever he wants he'll be more inclined to not want to go anywhere

You're bound to be weary but he does sound like your his number 1

Quite a true fact actually. I've been talking to my OH about others' issues and often the more you make a big deal out of something or are suspicious of a man cheating, the more they are pushed away and actually will do it. Doesn't make sense in some ways, yet, at the same time, jealousy can be a very negative thing on a relationship. Some jealousy is good because it shows one cares, but overjealousy is a negative thing.

Yet, I understand that from a past experience, it's very hard to trust and/or not be suspicious of things.