Devastated

[monkeynut]

I wasn't sure where to put this...

My ex is having my 5yr old son for Xmas

I'm such an idiot, I said to him last month that if he wanted to have him Xmas day he could as he has never had him for Xmas so it's only fair he has the chance to... Subconsciously I didn't think he would agree but today he phoned to say he will have him.

My son is autistic and doesn't quite understand the concept of Xmas yet, but enjoys opening presents.

I wish I had never offered and don't know why I did as his dad doesn't pay maintainance and only had him once a month if that- but he is a good dad when he does have him.

So he will open his presents on Xmas eve with me- I didn't think it would affect me like this but I haven't stopped crying since, I think it's worse as now I have LO it was going to be a proper family Xmas together- me and OH had planned to spend the morning together with the kids then go to his parents for lunch... But there will be a huge gaping hole without my son there.

I'm not looking forward to Xmas anymore (and I'm hoping that his dad will bail on the plans- he is mr unreliable when it comes to his son).

 

[DaisyPurple]

Oh hun, I'm sorry, didn't want to read and run xx

Sent from my HTC Desire S using Tapatalk 2

 

[Hunnie]

Fingers crossed for you he will bail out but it might do your son some good to be round his dad xx

 

[NicolaY86]

Touchy subject. Is a shame you arent getting the Xmas you wanted but like you said its only fair to let him have his turn of having his son.

And if he lets him down then least you know not to allow it again.

Your clearly a fantastic mother for putting your feelings aside in the 1st place to even think of the idea. Even though you wish you hadn't now.

You've got many many many years ahead to spend Xmas with your kids together.

He will thank you when hes older for making sure he sees his dad.

chin up luv

Nic xx

 

[monkeynut]

I have never ever stopped him seeing his son, despite how he basically destroyed my life with his lies, I know my son will have a great time with him (I did put the condition on him having him that he had to be spending it with his parents as that way I know son will get presents and a proper family Xmas as I can't rely on ex to buy him things) it's just hard- but as OH has said- next year he will most likely understand Xmas and actually get excited etc so if he has him now then we get at least the next few years together at Xmas with him understanding it (selfish view I know but true!).

 

[NicolaY86]

i dont think its selfish at all tbh I think I would feel exactly the same.