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Hun, dont feel bad. Bf is not an easy thing and it is most definately exhausting, you are not a failure.


Have u tried hot flannels on your boobs? This worked a tricked for me, my milk would ooze out like a tap, also have u thought about expressing? I used to express so my ppoh could do some feeds too.

Dont be too hard on yourself, happy mummy = happy baby.

Lots of people dont even try breastfeeding, i lasted two months and then switched to bottles, and i was alot happier!
 
Don't feel a failure Hun alot of people find it so hard to bf. My boobs were like yours and so full my baby found it hard to latch on. Nobody will judge you for bottle feeding. If you do want to do both I know a few ladies that have done it successfully. It's your decision and either way grace will be just fine x
 
I expressed a few times for Owen but the way to get him out of special care quicker was to bottle feed him so I did . When I stopped expressing my boobs went rock hard so i continued expressing and more and more time between thebetween them
And how much I'd express until they were normal. I don't feel guilty . My baby is happy and healthy. That's all that matters to me :) x
 
Hey hun....please don't feel bad, you're doing the best thing for gorgeous grace and that's feeding your baby! I know it sounds corny but a happy mummy means a happy baby!

I know how bloody hard bf is...I spent the first two weeks crying with bits of my nipple dropping off and it was hideous! You have to do what's best for you and for grace....big hugs and congratulations on your new arrival :) xxx


Sent from my nearly buggared iPhone!!
 
Hi hun, breastfeeding ishard work esp for the first 6 weeks. If you want to do it, you still can but it takes commitment. In the end of the day happy mum-happy baby.

I felt like a failure but I have low supply so I am mixed feeding.

I do find breastfeeding very rewarding (once you sort the latch etc/).Was she just comfort sucking? I know they say not too but you can introduce a dummy?

Whatever you decide to do, remember - your job is to feed Grace whichever way you choose to do it
 
I expressed directly into a bottle, and stored in the fridge. There was a thread about making up bottles. I from day one of bottle feeding used to make them up in advance, wait till they cooled and put in the fridge! ( even though this isnt reccmended, but it seems alot if people do it this way and i never had any problmsM!) I also found liquid milk a life saviour as i just poured the amount of oz into a bottle and heat it up in the microwave, obviosuly testing for hot spots.
 
What I do is sterilise bottles, boil the kettle, let it cool down and pour it into the bottles, put a lid on so the air doesnt get in. This way they will be at room temperature.

Then make up a bottle and heat it in a boiling water - much quicker.

You can store your milk in the fridge for 2 days I think, you can also add to the bottle during the day if you express couple of times (you will probably need to express not to get engorged).

Heat it the same way ie in the boiling water
 
Yes, ready made is good for emergencies
 
And just to add.... Expressing wasnt the nicest of experiences for me, if i missed an 'allocated expressing apot' so to speak, i found it every hard and painful. Lots of warm baths, and flannels, and i used to bite on a wooden spoon! I was happy enough to do it tho as my lo was tinyyyyy and i wanted him to have as much of my milk as i physically could express!

Liquid milk yes amazing but he paid about 2euros a bottle!!!
 
Thanks hun i cudnt work out how to copy and paste!
 
Don't feel a failure, bf is very exhausting, nobody tells you that! Your probably very hormonal just now too if your milk has just started to come in. It is normal for newborns to feed randomly and very frequently however they are fed, Kynon still feeds every 2-3 hours day and night, so I'm a bit of a zombie these days!

Lots of people combination feed so it might work for you. Do you have a pump? You can store breast milk for 48 hours on fridge or 3 months in freezer. I keep it in a bottle in fridge or a breast milk bag in freezer. I warm it in an advent bottle warmer only takes a couple of mins. Maybe start a thread about best way of making up formula, I've not got a clue how you do that sorry!
 
Hello - i remember feeling exhausted too and wanting to stop as my boobs were killing me. Nothing had prepared my for how big, hard and painful they would be! So on the Monday (LO was born on Thurs) i got myself to a local breastfeeding class. They gave me lots of encouragement and showed me different ways. Feeding lying down was the best one for me, but as mentioned in other threads, its a bit contraversial.

One of my boobs was so painful I expressed it, but he wouldn't latch on the other, so ended up expressing both very early on for a couple of feeds and it helped ease them. After first week, i was like a zombie plus my baby's father was acting like a real tw@ and i just cried and cried and cried....but then one day it just got better. There are so many hormones flowing and its so overwhelming having a newborn. I felt like a milking machine for the first six weeks, he would feed the entire time.

Try and have another go - maybe expressing will help? But if you choose to not do it, don't feel guilty, you are not a failure. Good luck and hope you get some quality sleep soon.
 
:hugs: defo don't feel like a failure. I tried for the first 2days with Phoebe but I don't think I was expressing anything. Although the midwife insisted she was getting colostrum. But my boobs have never felt any different and I've tried to express but I can't get anything out of them, not a drop. Plus Phoebe has a bit of tongue tie so she had trouble latching on. The midwives though kept adding the pressure man handling me and moving Phoebe in loads of different positions and it was just getting very stressful and I was worried that Phoebe wasn't getting anything.
The difference when switching to bottle though, it was just such a relief, I feel a lot less pressure and Phoebe is a lot less restless and sleeps better.
Don't feel bad at all hun if your stressed she'll pick up on it, so long as she's fed, clean, warm and has a happy mummy thats all she needs :) xx
 
Do not feel like a failure one bit!!!!!!!!!!! you shouldnt!!!!!!!!! this does sound very clicheed but its the truth happy mummy really does n mean happy baby! babies pick up on our emotions ie if we are stressed baby is etc...........I remember starting to bfeed joshua and honestly i wish i had the bravery to post a comment like you just have! I once fed j for 17 hours with an hour break i nthe middle it was hell and was getting me seriously deressed. not only did i start to resent myself but joshua everthing that that entailed. FOR me
 
sorry - for me formul feeding was the best thing i could have done! if you still would like to bfeed tiff, there are groups like La Leche league or other bfeeding gropus that could help if you ask your HV.MW. Other wise do not feel guilt one bit! you're doing so much good my keeping yourself healthy....

Massive hugs hun xx
 
At least you can say you've tried!! So I would defo say well done for trying.

You have your own body/sanity to think about too - its never an easy decision.

I was the same with my first, i've had a breast operation in the past (cancer) & really struggled to BF - had probs latching on & got mastisis (sp) & she fed hours & hours on end. All day & night it felt like, then after going thro that for a few weeks I ended up drying up. I cried about not being able to do it, its so so difficult.

I dont think there's enough info out there for pregnant woman about BF'ing, I thought u just stick ur boob in their mouth, how difficult can it be, I didn't know ppl actually had probs. And that made me even more depressed as I thought I was only one. They tell ppl the facts on BF'ing from the start, rather than the MW's trying to "teach" you an hour after you've given birth

:roll:
 
I had a terrible labour, 37 hours from first twinge to birth! Never thought it would be as bad as it was! Anyway I was totally exhausted by the time lo was born, no sleep, food and hardly any drink. So then bf'ing lo virtually 24/7 was really really hard! The amount of times I ended up intears because I was so tired! We started to give lo some formula at bedtime to try and get her to go through the night or partly anyway, this seemed to work. I gave up bf'ing after 4 weeks, partly because I was miserable but also it just didn't seem to be enough for lo, she was constantly feeding. I expressed as much as possible for about another 4 weeks until milk dried up, whilst giving her formula too. I just wish I'd got some support at the time.

Now I know what to expect, I will do a lot more next time to help me to continue. Still regret it sometimes but it was definately the best thing I could do for both of us :) They don't give you enough help in hospital these days with bf'ing, well not where I was anyway. They just stuck lo on my breast and left me to it! When my mum had us, they got a lot more support in hospital and the nurses made sure they were able to bd properly.

You are not a failure, no matter what you decide to do hun. Its one of the hardest things I've ever had to do, except labour that is lol x x
 
You have to be happy in yourself and make sure you aren't putting unnecessary stress on yourself. That said, yes, breastfeeding is hard work and takes a lot of commitment, esp in the early weeks, but the rewards are huge and I promise you, IT DOES GET EASIER.

I was lucky not to suffer sore nipples, but what I found incredibly hard, was the fact that you didn't know. Had no idea how much baby was getting etc etc. The fact that the baby is attached onto you so much is to tell your body to stimulate milk production. In a few weeks, that will get better. Do you have help/ support around you? I found this invaluable. My mum and hubby were amazing and did EVERYTHING for me, so all I did was sit on the sofa relaxing with a cup of tea and trying to learn how to feed. It is also a chance to be close to your baby. I literally came downstairs in the morning, sat on the sofa all day whilst people ran around me, and then went up to bed in the evenings with the baby!! I was so lazy! But I think without the support it would have been so much harder.

Also, expressing, esp in the early weeks, is no indication of how much your baby is getting. I remember getting quite distressed in the first few days, saying I couldn't see ANYTHING dribbling out of baby's mouth, there was nothing coming out of my boobs, and convinced I wasn't producing anything. However, just trust your baby, trust your body, and if your baby is latched on correctly, then things will start to feel natural.

Also, don't be afriad to call your midwife, HV and demand a home visit. I didn't need to do this, as I had my mum who jollied me up when I was down, understood my hormones, but I have recently requested this for some sleep help. Don't be afriad to ask for help - how else are we meant to know what we are doing?

As with anything, the hard work pays off, and as the baby gets older BF becomes even more lovely as they start to interact with you as they are feeding. I do think there is too much of a concentration on tiny babies sleeping long hours together when they are little - remember they have only just come out of you!

BUT, you must be happy, and try and rest and relax. If bottle feeding is a choice you make, be happy about it :)

Hugs xxxx
 
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