A few Questions

[lisa31]

Hi Girls

With only 9 weeks left to go (which all of sudden doesnt seem long!) my mind has started going into overtime and am having trouble sleeping with everything going round in my head! - Can anyone help with the following:-

1. Saw midwife today who said perhaps I should think about going on maternity leave earlier than planned (at 31 weeks im already very tired and breathless). My question is I have already given work my date of leaving for maternity leave - can I just change it without notice?

2. Has anyone else suffered from breathlessness this early on!? I assumed I wouldnt feel like this until the last few weeks.

3. I work full time but will be claiming for anything we can get cos we will lose quite a bit with me going on maternity leave. Does anyone know when I should start claiming the benefits? e.g child tax credit etc.

Poor D/H is really getting it in the neck- have spent most of the night arguing about how I need to get everything around the house sorted NOW and not in 2-3 etc etc weeks time - Im so stressed about everything. Stressing about work as I have so much to do when I go back on Monday (I'm still on Christmas break at the minute) - I know I should just take it easy and not worry about work - bloody hormones.

Sorry to rant on - just feeling a bit frazzled which I guess is normal!!??!! someone tell me it is!

L x

 

[petchy]

hi lisa,

don't know if i know the answers to all your questions but

1) i changed my maternity leave as well as i realised i would not be able to cope for as long as i thought! was originally going to carry on until 23rd of january, but decided to the 27th of jan, but brought it forward to the 20th and also use 2 weeks annual leave before then so in effect my last day is TOMORROW!!!!! yay!

officially you are supposed to give 4 weeks notice of any changes to the dates whenever possible, but very few employers dare say no to a pregnant woman! or at least that's what the lady in our HR dept said! lol - they are all scared of the implications if the woman complains supposedly!

HR also gave me this website to look at http://www.tiger.gov.uk/ which i found helpful!

2) i am 36 weeks today and have not had any breathlessness so far, so we're all different it seems! i thought with the size of my bump and me being only 5'4 i'd be huffing and puffing from way early on though! take it easy and try not to stress! (easier said than done i know! i'm nesting like mad these days even though the nursery is finished! can't stand to see the house dirty and messy, and am desperate to clear out and organise a couple of cupboards that i have neglected!!)

3) as far as i know you start claiming from after the baby is born, but not 100% sure on this! i'm gonna spend the last few eweeks downloading the relevant forms and filling them in as much as i can so i can send them off asap after the birth! although i believe they backdate things from the date you gave birth, so i have been considering waiting a little while so i get a bit more ££ just as my maternity pay drops from 90% to the £106 per week... cheeky me...

hey we never got round to meeting up did we? i'm off work from tomorrow so have more time on my hands from then and until the baby arrives - maybe we should give it another go? been in touch with claire but we've only met a couple of times too. hopefully when we are all on maternity leave we can find the time to meet up! i'm sure once OH is back at work and my mum has returned to norway i will be desperate for some adult company during the days at home!!

 

[michelle82]

In answer to question 1, you can see if they will let you leave earlier it will depend on your employer etc but normally you should give 28 days notice. But if your HR/Boss is good they may let you change without having to do this.

Question 2) I still get breathless its just the extra weight and blood pumping round. I left work when I was 34 weeks. Breathlessness is also a sign of anemia, have you been tested for this recently? as if not you may want to ask your MW as you may need Iron tablets, they helped me a bit. As I still get breathless if I do too much but generally I'm ok.

Question 3) my understanding is you cant claim anything until the baby is actually born, someone told me you get the forms for child benefit when your still in hospital, well you do here anyway.

Hope this helps, take care

 

[lisa31]

Thanks Petchy and Michelle - your replies have been very helpful.

It looks like I have anemia as I have to go on Iron tablets and the fatigue and breathlessness are getting worse. I only literally have to get up and make a drink or something and I am puffing and panting like an old woman - thanks for that Michelle - I did mention the breathlessness to the midwife but she didnt have anything to say about it and I didnt realise the two were connected till I read your reply and then looked on Google.

I'm also getting Restless Leg at night which also, I found out today is due to low iron! I tell you this forum is far better than asking your Doc or Midwife anything (well, round here anyway!) i pick up my prescription tommorow - really hoping they kick in quite fast.

Petchy - yes, Im suprised I may have to finish earlier too. My problem is I compare myself to other people too much. A girl at work left to have a baby last year and she did up until 3 weeks before she was born - so I decided to do that too (mainly because of the money) I didnt even comprehend that I may not be able to go for that long. I suddenly also realised today that I am 10 years older than this girl at work so I should really give myself a break!!!! - no wonder I cant carry on like her Im not 22 anymore!!!! lol

Petchy, when I go materniry leave perhaps we could have a go at meeting up again then or maybe when the little ones are around. You havent got long to go have you!!!!?? I bet your sooooo excited - I remember when you had months to go - doesnt time fly.

Thanks for your replies though girls I seem to go from one worry to the next - D/H is wondering where the sweet woman is he married lol
Thanks again

L x

 

[petchy]

Petchy, when I go maternity leave perhaps we could have a go at meeting up again then or maybe when the little ones are around.

sounds good! let me know when you go on mat leave (you have my email still i presume? if not PM me!) and we can have another go at meeting up! i'm sure claire will be up for it too!

PS - heidi is such a beautiful name for a girl! i love it!

 

[lisa31]

Hi Petchy

Sorry for the late reply - been a bit down recently what with the feeling tired and the constantly going loo problem. I'm going to ring my midwife about it tommorow. I've worked out that I am going loo on average 8/9 times a night and between 24-30 times in the day - this just cannot be right can it!??? its getting me down and its not easy when Im still at work.

Yes, I have your email, so we will have to arrange a date - that suits us all (you will have your little one soon!!!) When is Claire's due I have forgot (again!)

Thanks for the compliment with the name - I've always liked the name (and the story since I was a kid so it sort of fitted just right!) and the D/H likes it - we couldnt agree on a boys name so its pretty good job that its a girl!!!!

L x

 

[petchy]

sorry to hear you've been a bit down recently. you must be absolutely shattered with the lack of sleep from the "loo problem" and then having to go to work too..! i wake up at least 4-5 times in the night too, admittedly not as bad as your 8-9 times but i can sympathise definitely!! my 1st day off work today and it's bliss, i still woke up early but at least i can lounge around in my PJs until whenever i feel like getting dressed!

claire's just over 33 weeks now i think, if i remember rightly. so not too long to go for either of us! very exciting! i started to pack my "just in case" hospital bag yesterday..... i do hope i don't need it and that little ruben is welcomed into the world at home - but at least everything is within easy reach then!

i'll drop you girls an email soon, hoping we can find a date to meet up!

 

[lisa31]

Hi - its been a few days again since I came on here properly. Going work full time and having no sleep really isnt mixing well!
I have changed my maternity leave to start on 3rd Feb so not that much longer to go now! (only 18 working days left to go!!!!!!)

Rang the midwife today to try and get some more advice on the going loo thing. But she rang my mobile whilst I was out walking the dog so will have to call her tommorow.

How exciting packing your hospital bag!!! I cannot wait to do that. I must admit my neighbour gave birth a couple of months back and I saw her husband take her hospital bag out to the car - well it was more like a suitcase - I cant imagine the hospital allowing that - but then again after reading some of the lists I've seen of the items that ask you to bring I'm not surprised a suitcase is needed.

At least the iron tablets have kicked in although my heart races still - must remember to ask midwife why it does that!

Hope you are well

Whats it like being on maternity leave then!!??!!!

L x

 

[Kim]

I had a suitcase and a holdall, and I still hadn't packed enough and people had to bring me stuff in lol!!