establishing a routine

[Sandi4Paul]

Hi i am the osrt of person whol lives by routines, they just make me feel a lot more safe and comfortable, so i think i want to head down this route when i get LO home.

Unfortunatly i am not sure how to start, so can i have the following tips please?

when to start, right away after a few days or a couple of weeks? i.e once breast feeding is more esablished, or is establishing it part of the early routine

What sort of things to have in the routine and how did anyone structure thier day? from those of you who did a routine.

how flexible should you be if someting comes up (not counting emergency circumstances like sickness which are completly different).

are their any books which are especially good at offering advice on routines?

No offence meant but if you choose not to do a routine please don't respond to this thread.

I have nothing agaisnt being flexible and going with the flow, but it's just not me, if the routine doesn't work yeah i'll do it, or if i have a personality metamorphosis during labout i will too, but i have always have self imposed routines from about the age of 7 and don't cope as well without them.

thanks in advance for any replies.

Sandi

 

[Jimmer]

The best book I have found on this that really helps - and you dont have to take all of it, but I think it gives good advice is


The New Contented Little Baby Book: The Secret to Calm and Confident Parenting by Gina Ford

Certainly worth a read if you are not sure where to turn.

 

[trixipaws]

lol i was the opposite i never lived by routines and having a baby knocked me for six! we only started a routine really at around 3 months, when melissa became cranky in evenings so we started a bedtime routine. i was breast-feeding but i think had i been using bottles i mightve easily slipped into a routine of sterilizing, making up feeds etc- because when i started solids thats when our lives became proper routined- coz not only was there the bedtime malarkey, but also the 3 meals a day which still does give each day structure. every day is mapped around breakfast, lunch, tea and bed! thats REALLY routine-y to me, coz prior to the baby i never ate set meals, never got up at the same time (except for work days which were 3 days a week so less than 50% of the time) i just never had any routine or structure- and now i do. i really think u wont need to even try, a routine will fall into place itself. i was told that by mums when i was pregnant and a new mum and they were right its true!

 

[daftscotslass]

I think you can try a routine right from the start but be well aware that most new babies will have other ideas! You can try and do the same things like baths etc at the same time but in the first few weeks the timings of feeding etc will be all over the place and unpredictable.

I started a routine with Becky at about 4 weeks when her colic was becoming unbearable. A bath at about 7.30pm seemed to help, she has a feed at 8-8.30 (she is bottle fed) and bed straight after. More often than not she's awake when put to bed but drifts off within half an hour. We haven't looked back since! This is the only part of the day I've structured and it works for us.

She's still feeding on demand so she's fed when she's hungry, sleeps when she's tired (rarely during the day!) and changed when she needs it. With regards to feeding, especially breastfeeding (from what I've heard) in the early days you really just have to go with the flow and try to drop all expectations of being able to regulate when and how often your LO will feed.

 

[happy-chick]

To be honest i'd say you'll be VERY lucky if you manage to get ur baby into a routine from early on, they tend to do as they please (the opposite to what you want them to normally lol) and get themselves into a routine when they are ready... dont put too much pressure on yourself and go with the flow

 

[Bagpuss17]

I found the my son fell into a routine himself, it was a cycle of feeds, bit of activity and sleep.

As he got bigger the gap between naps widened and the amount of activitiy time he had increased as he became more alert during the day time.

In the evenings, we started a bedtime routine at about 8-10 weeks. Bath, feed and bed. He would wake up about 3 or 4 hours later for another feed.

We had a great routine established early on but not a routine that's dictated by time i.e. had naps at set times etc..more of cyclic routine as I described above.

As he got older, his naps dropped from 3 a day to 2 and now he has 1 nap in the afternoons.

It's never to early to start a routine, you go with what feels right for you.

I defo recommend introducing a bedtime routine from about 8 weeks onwards. It's paid off for us.

As others have said, the first few weeks you may need to just go with the flow.

 

[lea m]

I also found all mine fell into routines themselves!
I mean I did help lol!
When they got to the age of sleeping through, they all started with the 10pm-8am routine! They did that themselves!
Gradually I brought it down to 9 then 8!
Occasionally they didnt fall asleep etc so I would still put them into bed anyways as I didnt want them to break the routine they had etc!
They have always had a good routine and are always in bed by 7.30!
But yeh the first few weeks you need to go with baby!

Oh and one great tip, try to baby to bed most of the time while awake!
My seem like common sense but a lot of people hold baby until they fall asleep then put them in bed, this makes them get used to it and only go to sleep on mums knee etc!