Why do people say "was it a surprise"..

Discussion in 'Second Trimester' started by Puppy mad, Jun 5, 2013.

  1. Puppy mad

    Puppy mad Well-Known Member

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    Just a little hormonal rant this afternoon..

    I'm getting fed up of people asking if podge was planned.. People I don't even know.. My boss's cleaner noticed my bump today..got me excited, but she swiftly asked if it was a surprise. Not that it matters, but..no it was 100% planned. My oh and I are both nearly 30, have our own house, nice car and great jobs.. Grrrrr.

    Rant over. Sorry.

    Hope you are all enjoying the sunshine :).

    Xxxx
     
  2. Jodie_2013

    Jodie_2013 Well-Known Member

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    Haha bless you I think it's normal normal peoples reactions to pregnancy they are quite nosey and can come across rude.
    Some people have asked me that and it does take me a back slightly and say yes it was planned like you we both are in stable jobs, nice cars, mortgage and been together 6 years etc
    Don't think they realise we have raging hormones!!! X
     
  3. Puppy mad

    Puppy mad Well-Known Member

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    It's funny how blunt people can be.. I wouldn't dream of asking if someone's baby was planned or not..

    Stupid hormones lol

    Xxx
     
  4. Sparklisam

    Sparklisam Well-Known Member

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    I got back with partner of 8 years after a year break and after a few months back together we knew it was what we both wanted and I get asked this question aswell !! Think it is rude tbh as I am not one to do anything without thinking about it. Completely understand that surprises happen but does agrivate me !!

    Hormones n pregnancy ... A lovely combination to live with !! Ha

    Sam x
     
  5. Littlesammy

    Littlesammy Well-Known Member

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    Oh my manager asked me this which really irritated me. What did he expect me to say, "no, I'm 32, just got married and it happened by accident". Grrr so annoying!!
     
  6. ellesbells

    ellesbells Well-Known Member

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    I know this annoys me. Now with the type I think will ask I start with we are delighted and its what we were hoping for! Shuts them up :)
     
  7. Puppy mad

    Puppy mad Well-Known Member

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    That's a great idea.. :).

    It's the people who don't know me which isn't so bad.. But still jeez. Some people have a nerve .

    X
     
  8. Geekachublog

    Geekachublog Well-Known Member

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    Everyone becomes extremely nosey once you're pregnant, I've found.

    Isn't it always a surprise? Planned or not? There's always an element of surprise when those two little lines show up on that pregnancy test, whether you've been trying or not, right?!

    I've found people (even those without children) suddenly want to give me ALL THE ADVICE! Haha people are a funny bunch.
     
  9. Puppy mad

    Puppy mad Well-Known Member

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    The word surprise doesn't sound so bad when described like that :).

    I have also been asked "was it planned". People.

    Oh gosh, totally with you on people's advice.. Even those without children..

    X
     
  10. Lulubelle

    Lulubelle Well-Known Member

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    I am a teacher, it is amazing what 15 year old girls think it is okay to ask! TBF most of the time I will answer their questions because they know I am quite open about things, but (not intentionally) they ask things which, if I answered, could be construed as talking directly about my sex life so I do explain that it is not appropriate. I cease to be offeneded because they are just interested.
     
  11. babybee

    babybee Well-Known Member

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    First thing my boss said to me when I told him was 'was it planned?' Wtf?! None of his business! I told him I didn't see how that was relevant.
     
  12. Dotty_woman

    Dotty_woman Well-Known Member

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    I felt exactly the same hun! Yes it was planned! I got so fed up of people asking that when I made the official announcement I specifically said it was planned. Funny how I managed not to get pregnant for 12 years but that was because I WAS ON CONTRACEPTION!! I feel your pain!!! xxx
     
  13. Tigger87

    Tigger87 Well-Known Member

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    I've only been asked this once. A very good friends fiancée thought it was an appropriate conversation.

    We came back from honeymoon end of November, fell pregnant mid December. She asked if it was a honeymoon baby and I said not quite "oh, was it a surprise then?". I just laughed a little rather than attempting to explain its not always as easy to say "I want to get pregnant" and it happening as soon as you think it!!!
     
  14. JJ Mum

    JJ Mum Well-Known Member

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    Oooh it makes me so angry this one!!

    I had a 9 year gap after my third child and my last child and maybe its only natural for them to assume and think it, i was quite taken aback at the 95 percent if them , ( inc like you say people who dont know you) who asked straightaway, was it planned, oh very much so id say!! Shocking, ignore them?

    Luckily now having a 2 yr old i havent had it yet this time and most people havent notticed yet, touch wood
     
    #14 JJ Mum, Jun 5, 2013
    Last edited: Jun 5, 2013
  15. ChloeSmith

    ChloeSmith Well-Known Member

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    We've had the opposite, people say "oooh about time" to us! We'll have been married 3 years when bubs is born and particularly the older generation of our family think this is too long!

    It really upsets me as if we hadn't lost our baby last time he/she would be here by now. Don't they realise how hard ttc is and how hurtful they're being?! Truth is, I don't think they think at all!

    Grrrrr people make me cross! Xxx
     
  16. Puppy mad

    Puppy mad Well-Known Member

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    Aww bless you.

    People just don't think.

    On a positive.. Happy 20 weeks Hun.. Half way there :). Woop.

    Hugs x
     
  17. Gemsy

    Gemsy Well-Known Member

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    My mum asked me too!! It must be a common thing! To be fair, I don't think she was being rude, I think she was genuinely surprised!
     
  18. MrsHop

    MrsHop Well-Known Member

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    Loads of people have asked me this, erm... we've been married a year... what do you think? Just a rude question really! I don't know why it matters, we'd still have baby if it wasn't!
     
  19. holly1

    holly1 Well-Known Member

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    oh this is really bugging me! this is my first pregnancy and when we annouced it pratically everyone was like owe was it planned? owe was it a surprise? i was totally taken back. Its like i have been with my OH for 12 years we met at school i think after 12 years and living together i think its was planned! I totally appreciate that surprises happen and thats fantastic but the way i get asked is like oh was it planned? like im still at school at just met my OH.... we have been together 12 years already shouldnt be that much of a shocker that we planned to have a baby? but i like what someone has said previously that whether trying or not it is still a surprise, which it really is!!

    lol rant over :)
     

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