What am i doing wrong?

beckyboo1

Well-Known Member
Joined
Sep 7, 2011
Messages
3,643
Reaction score
0
Sitting here crying my eyes out cos i can't get Harry to settle and go to sleep
these last few days hes been horrendous at going to sleep - it take repeated attempts with crying in between to get him off.

Last night it took over an hour and hlf to get him off.

We've stuck to the bath, bob and bed routine (albeit at slightly altering times) but pretty much always to coincide with making sure he goes down 2 hours after his last sleep at hte latest.

So tonight we were bathed by 7ish feeding by 7.15. I made a concious effort to wind him for a good 5 mins,as hes been suffering a bit

Then laid him in his cot. Decided to stay in the room to give him a bit of reassurance and he woke a few mins later. left him a bit before his mumblings/groans broke in to a full cry

Got him back off again, left mobile playing a bit of white noise and went and hibernated in the ensuite!!

Thinking i can go back in uickly if he starts to kick off. So left it 10 mins and came downstairs

5 mins later hes starts again and is now full blown wailing. OH is with him.

don't know what to do to make it better. He will now get himself so worked up that he won't sleep cos hes tired, and the vicous circle continues.

LAst night he woke after an hour of finally going down, which resulted in me and H going into the nursery on the rocking chair and sleeoing there for an hour til i could put him in his cot

I know i've had it ok up til now but this is doing my head in

I don't know if its just his wind or what

Help xxxx
 
Can you rock his Moses basket or whatever he's sleeping in?
Try warning blankets before he goes in?
Put an item of your clothing in with him so he can smell you still?
White noise?
My l/o liked his face/head being stroked

I know it's hard isn't it big hugs Hun xx
 
Is the room dark enough?

Sent from my E15i using Tapatalk 2
 
it sounds like a mixture of things hunni, from wind to anything like teething which can take weeks. i would try inforcol i think its called for wind or grip water i live by it. as for him keep crying to the point he wont sleep all i can say is keep at it. it will pay off. just take it in turns and if you feel you cant take it anymore without screaming go for a walk or get some air count to 10 before even thinking of going back to him. and if need be leave him to cry while you do this. if its teething nothing you can do til he is 3 months old. otherwise i cant really think of anything else apart from speak to you HW hunni, i hope you get some sleep tonight and he calms for you x x x
 
Aww love. When Tyler's inconsolable I rock him in his car seat or bouncy chair. He only sleeps for 20 mins but it's enough to calm him down and when he wakes up I can put him to bed properly

Don't really know what else to say!


 
this really is clutching at straws as its the only thing i can think of. but we always do bath, bottle and bed routine at same time every night, regardless of what time her last nap was. sometimes, she may have napped til say 5:15, but we still start her bathtime and bed routine at 5:30.....she normally goes to bed no later than 6:30 and even if she has only woken from a nap at 5:15, she still goes down no problem. I think its because she is just so used to the routine, that she knows after her bath its proper bedtime and touch wood, we havent had many problems (we are very lucky!). It could be that leavibg it 2 hours after the last nap means he may be just bordering on getting too tired and thats why he is struggling.

tonight hannah only woek from nap at 5:15 and because she wasnt overtired, there were no tears at all throughout all of bath routine, she took her bottle fine and was down in bed at 6:15 and asleep by 6:30 and not a peep since......(prob jinxed it now! )

only thing i can think of........really feel for you xx
 
Princess he sleeps in a cot in our room so can't rock it

He sleeps in a gro bag so shouldn't feel any temp difference and I always have a Muslim in bed with him so he can smell me

He has gripe water tabbi so there's nothing more I can do for the wind

I've just got him calm and half asleep. Gone to put him down and the minute I move away he screams

Hubby is with him now as I'm losing the plot with it. I know he's tired but it's like he just won't fall into a deep enough sleep

I was trying to avoid keeping hold of him for too long after he drops off so that he doesn't get used to that

He doesn't have a dummy but does suck his thumb for comfort

I'm just worried now he's not getting enough sleep and it's just perpetuating matters
 
He should really be ready for sleep if he's had a nap 2 hours before bedtime. Is he getting a lot of sleep in the daytime? And so isn't ready to go down? Or he might be overtired and 2 hours is too long to keep him awake and so he's fighting it? Was he sleepy when you were feeding him? T chops usually falls asleep during the feed after the bath. Have you fed him enough?

Tips I have that usually work are swaddling in a sheet and laying her on her side then pop a dummy in and stroke her hair or pat her back.

The swaddling is key to us I think because it makes her feel secure and she calms down very quickly after that.

He should be getting very tired if he has cried for that long now. I hope he is asleep for you x
 
Princess he sleeps in a cot in our room so can't rock it

He sleeps in a gro bag so shouldn't feel any temp difference and I always have a Muslim in bed with him so he can smell me

He has gripe water tabbi so there's nothing more I can do for the wind

I've just got him calm and half asleep. Gone to put him down and the minute I move away he screams

Hubby is with him now as I'm losing the plot with it. I know he's tired but it's like he just won't fall into a deep enough sleep

I was trying to avoid keeping hold of him for too long after he drops off so that he doesn't get used to that

He doesn't have a dummy but does suck his thumb for comfort

I'm just worried now he's not getting enough sleep and it's just perpetuating matters

sounds like your covering all area's here hunni. And good on you for him not having a dummy its hard when they dont have one compared to when they do.
he will be getting his sleep hun maybe not all of it yet, but when he has breaks from crying even if its not sleep but him drinking or lying there he is resting which is where they get there energy from.

your doing really well and keep telling yourself that. some babies do this its just something some couples/parents go through. talk to your HW hunni they will be able advise best hun. just let both you and your OH get some air and a chance to get away for 5 from the crying it should help hun x x x
 
We had this exact problem with Emily for a while - it was driving me insane. It wasn't until we introduced a dummy at about three months that she got a bit better. But I guess if your LO s a thumb sucker the dummy wouldn't make ny difference. I really feel for you as I know his tough it s... Hugs... Xx
 
Tor he hates being swaddled as he likes kicking his legs. Hence the gro bag

When I first put hin down after his feed ( which he fell asleep with) it was about 1 hour 40 since his last sleep. Thought I'd timed it right!!

I don't think he is getting enough sleep during the day. The weekend mucks him up I think

The only way he'll sleep for longer than 40 mind during the day is on me

I'm back to feeding him now as its nearly 2 hours since his last feed

I have a feeling after this feed he'll go to sleep

I do think it's his wind it's like he has to go through an hour of being unsettled and crying with it before he can sleep

Last week was a mess cos both me and Harry had colds. Determined to try and make this week better

Being a mummy is so hard xx thank you for your support ladies
 
we are here for you hunni always.
and yes been a mummy is hard but yet so rewarding hun.
could the cold still be lingering by any chance causing him to feel unwell but with no symtoms? its an idea that he might not be over it yet x x x
 
At 2 months I was still feeding Will to sleep, I would do it in the living room, when he was asleep I would lay him on my chest for 30 minutes or so until he was in a deep sleep and then I'd put him into his cot. This way he was in such a deep sleep he didn't wake up again and always slept thru. At 5 ish months I put him in his cot and he has self settled ever since. Not sure if that helps or not xx
 
Ohh sweetie it really is so hard!! But I wouldn't worry about him getting used to falling asleep on you- babies that young need to be cuddled and comforted to sleep as they can't just fall to sleep on their own. There's no way I could feed max at night then put him in the cot n expect him to sleep- he just wouldn't do it. As you've prob seen I don't do a routine anymore at all and he's finally down to only 1 feed in the night around 4am (this could just be a phase) and he goes down easily. Whatever time he sleeps/wakes in the eve, I do the bath around that- usually around 8ish, then massage, pjs , little sit down and wait til I think he's hungry then take him into the bedroom in the dark and quiet, lay him on me while I feed him n keep him on me for at least half hour. I then put him onto the other side of the bed and leave him there til me n OH go to bed, then I move him into cot.

You really can't spoil a newborn hunnie!! He prob just needs you to comfort him to sleep sometimes and possibly by putting him down first it might have put him off sleeping?? Just an idea. Some people don't agree about spoiling newborns though so its up to you what you think but it works for us and ill keep doing it til 5/6 months or until I think he's ready to fall asleep on his own :)

Pm me if you wanna chat xxxxxx
 
You aren't doing anything wrong my lovely! It's just babies don't always read the manual!! I'm still letting Evie fall asleep on me sometimes and then popping her in the cot as sometimes it's the only way I can get her down for a nap, but as I'm learning to read her signals better this is getting less and less - in fact she's started to self settle this week - something I never thought would happen! He will learn how to go down without a fight eventually, he just loves his mummy hugs! Lots of great suggestions that I would struggle to add to but sending hugs instead. You are a fab mummy who is just having a tough few days. xxx
 
i have no advice different from whhat the girls have lready said, just wantwed to send hugs :hugs: xxx
 
That you all again- now its your messages making me cry!!

He's finally asleep after a stint with his dad!

New day new week tomorrow so maybe it'll get better xxxxx
 
Hun ur doing nothing wrong baby's are hard work . Hope ur feeling ok x


 

Users who are viewing this thread

Members online

No members online now.

Latest posts

Forum statistics

Threads
473,584
Messages
4,654,687
Members
110,062
Latest member
mzoel1257
Back
Top