Waiting, waiting, waiting!

Discussion in 'Coping with Miscarriage & Loss' started by jazzsaxplayer, Jun 9, 2016.

  1. jazzsaxplayer

    jazzsaxplayer Well-Known Member

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    Hi all,

    I was so excited to post my BFP on 1st June after 5 years of "trying" (long story). Anyway, at 5 weeks and 3 days starting bleeding. Been worried every since. After lots of ringing round EPU advised too early to see anything so booked with them on Tuesday. They advised in meantime to continue with the referral appointment I had booked with midwife. She was lovely but didn't feel I could get excited as not sure if peanut is sticking with us or not. A lovely women approached me before appointment asking had I thought about how going to feed baby. I was nice to her but inside was like wooohhhaaaa it's too early and I'm having bleeding! I just feel like my very strong symptoms have faded 😢 A lot of ladies have shared their positive stories with me but alas I don't think ours is going to be. I'm loathed to test again as likely still
    positive even if no peanut so have agreed with hubby to do one on Saturday when no work to think about. We then wait until EPU on Tuesday 🤑
    So sorry to be reading some of the other posts on here. It does seem to have been a month with non-sticky beans 😢 xxx
     
  2. PeanutButter

    PeanutButter Well-Known Member

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    Sorry hun :( Hopefully its just early pregnancy bleeding. Xx
     
  3. MissCharli

    MissCharli Well-Known Member

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    I'm really sorry to hear that :( I hope that everything is all fine for you at the EPU x
     
  4. MrsDuckie

    MrsDuckie Well-Known Member

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    I hope everything goes well at the EPU. xx

    If you don't mind me asking, how heavy has your bleeding been and has it been daily since it began? I started seeing bleeding today when I wipe. Rang the midwife and she said not to worry if it didn't soak a pad. First appointment was already booked for next Thursday.
     
  5. jazzsaxplayer

    jazzsaxplayer Well-Known Member

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    Depends really. In some ways I think in terms of the amount I've not had that much....had pad on but if never got soaked it was only ever when I wiped. Started brown and then went pink to red. It's been on and off. I also had one piece of clot last night which made me think it was bad. Woke up this morning and this sounds terrible but felt loads better. However, this afternoon some pregnancy symptoms are back including sickness and that stretching feeling in tummy. I'm so confused I feel like I'm cracking up so trying not think about it until Tuesday.

    I've read soooooo much on bleeding in pregnancy and can promise you that loads of women have it, some quite heavy in early pregnancy so do what midwife says and try not to worry xxx


    Thanks ladies for all your support 👍😃
     
  6. MrsDuckie

    MrsDuckie Well-Known Member

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    How are you doing today jazz? My bleeding was slightly heavier today, still not soaking a pad but definitely more than there was yesterday. Frer test with first morning wee was negative. I'm only around 4 1/2 weeks so think that it's over now sadly. Dr said it was too early for a scan but to be honest I don't 'feel' pregnant anymore, and I was getting symptoms each day.

    Good luck hun, I think it's a great sign that you are still having your symptoms. Let us know the result of your next test. xx
     
  7. jazzsaxplayer

    jazzsaxplayer Well-Known Member

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    Sorry not been on a few days; trying not to think about things but not successful! Did a test Fri and negative 😢. Bleeding stopped Wednesday. Only passed one small clot so not sure if that is it or not. Symptoms are all still there and getting progressively stronger so not sure how that can be. Got our scan at 10am so we will see what is going on x How are you?
     
  8. luratraloora

    luratraloora Well-Known Member

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    Im so sorry about your negative test hun. :( All the best for your scan today. Xxx


     
  9. louise2610

    louise2610 Well-Known Member

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    Jazz thinking of you & hoping you get positive news from your scan this morning. Keeping everything crossed for you 🙏
     
  10. BunnyN

    BunnyN Well-Known Member

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    Thinking of you today. I am so hoping for good news for you. If not at least I hope you get some closure. I remember when I had the scan confirming my MC it was crushing but also there was a sense of relief not to be in limbo. Hugs.
     
    #10 BunnyN, Jun 14, 2016
    Last edited: Jun 14, 2016
  11. jazzsaxplayer

    jazzsaxplayer Well-Known Member

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    Hi all, scan confirmed my mc �� Was very upset but like you say BunnyN also slightly "relieved" not to be in limbo. Womb lining is starting to thin and HCG low so consultant advised fine to start trying again. Felt a bit rough the last couple of days....think all the emotions and fluctuations in hormones over the last 3 weeks have taken their toll so just taking it easy (well apart from work lol). Going to have a weekend of therapeutic cleaning and gardening to help take my mind off things. Hoping that I will shortly know where my bodies at and we can start trying again. The one silver cloud in all this is that we actually got pregnant - something we never thought would happen ���� Thanks for the support ladies; means a lot x
     
  12. BunnyN

    BunnyN Well-Known Member

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    I'm so sorry. Take care of yourself and take time to grieve when you need it. You will probaby br quite up and down for a while. I hope your next BFP comes soon and is a sticky one.
     
  13. luratraloora

    luratraloora Well-Known Member

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    So sorry for your loss. Xx


     
  14. MrsDuckie

    MrsDuckie Well-Known Member

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    So sorry to hear this Jazz. Xx

    It's upsetting wjen you've only just allowed yourself to start thinking it's real and get excited. I stayed off work one day last week as kept randomly bursting into tears. Feeling positive that like you say, we know we can get pregnant. Also apparently your hormones are high after so I'm hoping for this month.

    Are you trying again straight away or having a break?
     
  15. jazzsaxplayer

    jazzsaxplayer Well-Known Member

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    Yeah been a bit teary too but luckily Holby City sad this week so had a good blub to that lol! We are "trying" straight away. I say that as we're not using any protection but I have no idea where I'm going to be in terms of a cycle. I've done a lot of reading that says you ovulate quite quickly after so thinking I should start with OPK's? I don't usually have many signs of OV except tender breasts but this hasn't stopped since mc 😃

    How are you? x
     
  16. MrsDuckie

    MrsDuckie Well-Known Member

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    Good to get it out hun, with an excuse like Holby too! :) Glad to hear that you're doing okay. Xx

    I'm alright thanks. A few ouch flinch moments with the usual innocent baby comments to my DH and I (we got married last summer so get them a lot!).

    I've been using opks and have had faint positives already so don't know if I've ovulated already or not? TMI but had EWCM and was super up for it lol which is usually a good indicator of ovulation for me! Still keeping it up throughout the month just in case!
     
  17. jazzsaxplayer

    jazzsaxplayer Well-Known Member

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    Yeah that's me too - faint opus. I've used them before and they are usually clear until around on and then do get a bit darker but I never normally get one as dark as the test line anyway. We could be symptom twins in the sense that I too have been up for it and also had lots of discharge- like you say a good sign of ovulation. We too are bd'ing as much as possible every night so far since I've had faint lines on ok but we won't keep that up all month hahaha, plus no need to anyway 😀
    Fingers crossed that whilst are bodies are still baby ready we get another bfp with sticky beans this month!
     
  18. MrsDuckie

    MrsDuckie Well-Known Member

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    :sperm: :egg:

    Fingers crossed!! :)

    My opk was fainter again today so I'm convinced I've ovulated which would be earlier than usual. Here's hoping....!
     

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