waiting to miscarry

Discussion in 'Coping with Miscarriage & Loss' started by lilcurly, Feb 28, 2016.

  1. lilcurly

    lilcurly Well-Known Member

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    Good Morning all.

    On Monday I had a BHCG test taken and my result was 72 MIU I was 5+5 and they told me it was normal. I had my bloods taken again on Wednesday and the doctor phoned me with the result. The level had reduced to 67 at 6 weeks. She told me to expect a miscarriage. The cramps and spotting are starting. Would it have been easier if I didn't know it was coming? Sitting here everyday wondering if that day is when it will start properly is torture. The doctors wouldn't do anything to help me, they said I just need to wait it out. I find the whole scenario to be very heartless. Not only do I have to sit here and wait for a "heavier than normal period" I have to also come to terms with the fact that this is the most I will get from my healthcare provider is a talk about how the baby wasn't even a baby yet. It doesn't matter that it wasn't a baby yet. I loved it.
     
  2. Unicorn

    Unicorn Well-Known Member

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    I'm so sorry lilcurly, what a horrible situation. I hope you're OK xx
     
  3. lilcurly

    lilcurly Well-Known Member

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    Thank you Unicorn. I'm just so fed up of waiting. I've started to come to terms with the fact that the baby isn't there anymore but I want the bleeding to hurry up so I can feel some sense of closure if that makes any sense xxxx
     
  4. kaz1983

    kaz1983 Well-Known Member

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    So sorry hun :( how heartless of ur gp i find that they have that kind of attitude cos they deal with it regularly but to you u were carrying a baby id agree it was a baby too no matter how early

    Ive bn thru a miscarriage and its not nicd we got to our 12week scan not knowing anything was wrong an it was heartbreaing hearinv those words take care rest plenty an take time to grieve xx
     
  5. Cherrybelly

    Cherrybelly Well-Known Member

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    I had a MC at six weeks in December and it was basically like a heavy period. I didn't go to the epau until I'd had quite a bit of bleeding as I didn't think there was anything they could do. I find doctors very cold when it comes to mcs, I think unless you've been there, you really don't have a clue how it feels. Rest up and do all the things you couldn't do when pregnant - drink wine, have really hot baths and eat delicious cheese! Take care, we're all here if you need us Xxxx
     
  6. jomc

    jomc Well-Known Member

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    Im so sorry hun :(
    I had an mc in Sept around the same time...it was quite quick and to be honest I have had worse periods, so I was grateful for that
    I think doctors and people like that can be quite cold and unsympathetic towards most thjngs.
    Dont let it get to you...rest up and take care of yourself xx
     
  7. MelH999

    MelH999 Well-Known Member

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    Sorry you are going through a mc. I'm just in my first cycle since mine in Jan. The waiting was very difficult and I understand you saying you just want it to start and be over. It's sad when it starts but you do feel glad, because it's going to be over quicker- weird feeling. Mine was heavier than a period, I'm not saying that to worry you, just to give you a heads up so you don't worry. Call your EPU if you soak a pad v quickly or loose a clot and feel dizzy, faint or shaky afterwards. I passed two and felt very cold and shivery, you just need them to check your blood pressure etc.

    Hopefully you will have a smooth mc and can start to move on and have closure. It's a bumpy ride, but it does get easier. Cry when you want to and don't feel pressure to feel anything other than how you feel xxx
     
  8. lilcurly

    lilcurly Well-Known Member

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    I'm still waiting for the bleeding :-( this is torture :-( I'm going to the doctors tomorrow afternoon but I'm not sure what will be/can done or said. I keep getting cramps like AF is about to start but nothing comes �� xxx
     
  9. Tigeress

    Tigeress Well-Known Member

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    That is absolutely disgraceful! I was just under 12 weeks when I lost both my babies and if someone had said or described it to me like that I would of hit the roof. I'm so sorry hunn, you deserve more respect that that and that is no way to treat a grieving mother. I am so sorry your going through this and when I was in my waiting period I begged an prayed it was just a hiccup. But sadly it wasn't. Lots of hugs and if you need to chat I'm only a message away anytime xxx
     
  10. MelH999

    MelH999 Well-Known Member

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    I stopped feeling preg at about 6wk and missed carried 8wk and 4 days. At times I just wanted a medical intervention, but looking back I'm glad I waited it out as horrid as it was. It's personal choice tho. I just read that it's less invasive than d/c and obv no general. I did go to the EPU as I did bleed heavier than normal and they helped remove what was in my cervix. Do you have their number close to hand? I found comfort and advice reading other people's stories but really non is like your own journey, but at least they can help you what to expect.

    Xxx
     
  11. lilcurly

    lilcurly Well-Known Member

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    So they've taken more bloods and the epau will call me tomorrow with the results and possibly ask me to go in for a scan. The doctor said something about, it may be a possibility that the pregnancy wasn't progressing normally but now it's progressing! This is awful to hear as I have done everything I shouldn't do during pregnancy in the passed week! :-( xxx
     
  12. MelH999

    MelH999 Well-Known Member

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    Try not to think about the drinking and anything else. I did that, ate and drank like an in preg lady to get me over the mess. I put on about 9lb in 2 weeks!

    I didn't find out I was preg with my first son until nearly 10 wks. I was 18 and it was Christmas. I explained to the midwife, and I know lots has changed now as medical info advances, but she said not to worry, as addicts of all kinds have perfectly healthy babies. So a few drunk nights won't be anything to worry about.


    I'm not sure what the doc means but hopefully you will have a scan tomorrow or Monday and they can let you know. Xx
     
  13. SiameseCatLady

    SiameseCatLady Well-Known Member

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    Good luck Lilcurly.,xx
     
  14. lilcurly

    lilcurly Well-Known Member

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    So, the doctor did the wrong test. Those are the exact words the EPAU nurse just said to me. My HCG is 57140!!!!! I'm so happy and so Angry!!! Xxx
     
  15. Tina18

    Tina18 Well-Known Member

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    Wow so happy to hear that, but how bad of the doctors to get that wrong! Try to relax as much as you can as im sure this has caused you stress.

    Look after yourself and I hope you have a happy and healthy pregnancy xxx
     
  16. SiameseCatLady

    SiameseCatLady Well-Known Member

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    As I put in other thread, congratulations!! Amazing! However, some investigation needs to be done into this - wrong for you to be put through this. Completely wrong. Ask to talk to doctor practice manager and make your feelings known! I did this when some lovely (male) nurse told me I was risking my baby's health by using my asthma inhalers and that I had to weigh up the risks! Uh, noooooooo. You need to tell me what to do as the 'professional'! They tried to fob me off, but I kept going and I think they took me seriously...
    Yours is worse, but they can't be playing with pregnant people's minds, let alone the average person!!
    So happy for you - you must feel as if you have a new lease of life!
     
  17. lilcurly

    lilcurly Well-Known Member

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    I want to feel happy and pregnant again, but at the minute I'm frightened. I'm frightened they've confused my results. I'm trying not to be too optimistic as I don't want to feel that way again :-( xxxx
     
  18. SiameseCatLady

    SiameseCatLady Well-Known Member

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    If they've confused your results again, I'd be hugely surprised, but understand... You need some time for it to sink in again. I wish I were more optimistic too - but it's good advice, that we get from other people: try to enjoy it. In nine months time, you'll probably wish you had! Xxx
     
  19. Unicorn

    Unicorn Well-Known Member

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    I'm so pleased for you lilcurly and what a bloody disgrace! xx
     

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