TTC struggles

Discussion in 'Long Term TTC & Fertility Issues' started by W1NDR1V3R, Apr 15, 2019 at 3:23 AM.

  1. W1NDR1V3R

    W1NDR1V3R New Member

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    hello Ladies,

    I am new on here. I am really struggling with the whole idea of pregnancy and just wanted to reach out because I’m sure I’m not alone.

    I have been with my boyfriend for almost six years. I haven’t been on any contraception for 1/6 years. I’m so mad/jealous/envy girls/family when I hear they got pregnant. Especially when they are 3-4 years younger then myself.

    I have had so many conversations with my boyfriend about having it planned rather then it just happening (his thoughts are if it happens it happens) I have been tested and nothing is wrong with me. I asked if he would get tested and he doesn’t really reply. He doesn’t know what he wants but doesn’t do anything to prevent it....

    I’m so confused and just feel miserable
     
  2. chattychar1990

    chattychar1990 Well-Known Member

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    Hey hun,
    I really feel for you. You have been with your OH for a long time now so you should both really be looking to the future and agreeing that you both want the same things.
    Are you tracking your cycles and know when you ovulate? If so and it has been a year and you know nothing is wrong with you it only seems fair that your oh would get tests done too.
    To me it sounds like your oh isn’t on the same page as you and maybe you both need to sit down and have a chat about what you both want from your relationship and the future together.
    I hope you can sort this soon and you get your dream x
     
  3. W1NDR1V3R

    W1NDR1V3R New Member

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    I’ve had so many conversations about this with him. Unfortunately he suffers with Aspergers and has a hard time as is when it comes to opening up/having conversations.

    I have tried tracking my period that’s about it. Currently I’m now two weeks late however I always do this to myself then but a test and get disappointed. I’m under some stress at the moment to so I’m just waiting it out until next month.

    I’ve been 5 months without being on anything. I was only on birth control for the first year.
     
  4. Bambi42

    Bambi42 Well-Known Member

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    Do you and your boyfriend go to the same doctors? If so you might be able to ask your doctor fpr a sample pot to take home. He can then provide a sample and you then deliver it to the hospital within a 1 hour period. No need to sit in a booth at a hospital!

    Of course he has to agree to giving a sample but perhaps part of the reason he doesn't reply is because he's embarrassed or worried about what is involved. Men don't talk the way that we do and so if none of his friends have done it it may be that he's no idea whats involved.

    Like @chattychar1990 says you have been together for a long time so its important to make sure you are on the same page because guys can have babies forever and we can't. You know him better than anyone so you'll find a way to have that chat and get across to him how much this means to you. Open questions are my secret weapon, they work much better than making statements.

    As for the jealousy, hurt, sadness of seeing everyone else falling pregnant when you want it so badly. We are all in that club. Personally I find it easier to focus on what I do have rather than what I don't. And cry, a lot!

    Good luck x
     

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