TTC after a termination, when to start?

[Anna B]

Hi, I have just recently had a termination (full story here http://www.pregnancyforum.co.uk/forum/viewtopic.php?t=37850&postdays=0&postorder=asc&start=0 ) and I'm wondering how soon is OK to start TTC again? Ideally we would like to be expecting again by the time Oliver was due, I know that might not be possible, but we did conceive Oliver in the first month of trying!!
If anyone has any advice, I would be most greatful.

 

[budge]

i would wait about 3 months.
let your body and mind recover

 

[libs]

See what the doctors say at you upcoming appt - did you have to try for a while for this LO? If so - then although it sounds back to front, I would have a little gap (maybe 2 cycles?) just to avoid getting tied up into the cycle of ups and downs that is TTC when you're still grieving and upset.

 

[mrs_tommo22]

Anna i have just read your post and replied, you are so brave and i admire you!
Its upto you what you do, but might be a idea to wait a cycle or two to get your hormone levels normal and body healthy again as you have just given birth darling your body might miscarry your new baby with all the stress it has gone through.And you dont want that to happen.
I hope you feel happy soon, and no matter how guilty you may feel -0 you did the right thing for oliver.

Please let your mind and body rest and you will be ready for a baby soon.

 

[muppetmummy]

I agree with what the others have said. It might be good to have a rest and to grieve properly first.
You are a very brave woman and Oliver will be proud of you. You did the very best you could for him and I'm sure he'll never be far away from you.
Best of luck TTC, I hope everything goes well for you and your family

 

[AnnaR2B]

Anna,
I would see your doctor, but as soon as you are psychologically ready then why not? the BD is a stress reliever anyhow!
So sorry to read your story, i notice you're near Glos...i'm in Ross. Also an Anna and TTC. PM me if you ever want to chat.

 

[claire81]

My sister has also lost 2 babies, so i have every sympathy with you. In both case her doctor told her to wait until she has a period.

 

[kellysomer]

Word cannot express my sympathy... you are an eternal tower of strength and i wish you every happiness in your future as you rightly deserve.

May your precious baby rest peacefully.

 

[katyk]

Oh I'm so sorry for your loss

The way I see it, when it comes to how long to wait, you are sort of in the same position of those of us who have m/c'ed. Or like any lady who has just given birth, sometimes it takes them a while to conceive again anyway due to hormone levels, sometimes not.

You are like those of us who have m/c'd, but with added nightmarishness

So I would suggest seeing how you get on emotionally, perhaps get some counselling if you feel that would help you. I had to have a D + C (which they botched ) then I'm waiting 2 proper periods before I try again. This was my second miscarriage and for me I need to wait. (This was the length of wait the doctors recommended too.)

I also want to give my baby the best chance, eat all the vitamins etc, because baby Henno was a happy surprise so the 'ground' wasn't prepared for him properly as well as it could have been.

I know a lot of the other ladies though are diving straight back in!

So it's up to you- what have your doctors recommended? Will they give you extra folic acid (I have to take a much higher dose, as an epilepsy med I'm on means a higher risk of neural tube problems) and in general what do they say? Perhaps you could have a good chat to them and see what they suggest.

Best wishes to you and your partner

 

[Anna B]

Thank you for all your replys, I appreciate it.

The docs haven't really recommended a time frame, just when we feel ready really. I have to admit, I can even think about doing a BD at the moment though, so it won't be happening yet.

I have been put on a much higher dose of Folic Acid, its over 10x the strength of the stuff you get in the shops, so thats got to be a good thing.

We are seeing the consultant who diagnosed Oiver on the 2nd of july, hopefully he will be able to tell us the risks etc, and when we can start again.

I suppose now I should just find out about all this charting bussiness, I know nothing about it, but I want to be able to do it all properly if we need it.

 

[smurf]

Hi hun I can't imagine what you are going through at the moment it must be so very hard but I am sure little Oliver will be looking after you.

I would say give yourself time to grieve and it might be a good idea to seek some councelling. Then when your ready just start bd don't start charting immediately give yourselves a bit of time just to relax and enjoy each others company and hopefully luck will be on your side and you'll get pg. Cos you have to remember the stress of actually ttcing can delay things a bit whereas you might be better off letting nature take its course.

I hope your apt with the consultant goes well on 2nd July. Take care hun time is a great healer.

 

[HappyAlice]

Hi there, I replied on your other thread, I'm so sorry about what's happened to you.
The only advise I can offer is that when I had a miscarriage at 13 weeks, it took me a while to recover mentally, this was in March 2004 and we have just started talking about TTC again at christmas. I would make sure you are really ready, and it will also give you time with your OH to make sure you are strong again. The last thing you want is to get pregnant again for it only to be really stressful with arguments etc as it won't be good for baby. After all this time since the MC happened to me I know that me and OH are strong and have recovered as much as we can and are ready, but if we hadn't waited I wouldn't have been so sure with all the strain we would have been under, especially if we had gone through a rough patch during the former pregnancy. Do what you can to make sure the 2nd pregnancy is as stress free as possible and that you and OH are strong