Truths about being a Teen Mother

Discussion in 'Relationships' started by SweetAtHeart12, Jan 5, 2008.

  1. SweetAtHeart12

    SweetAtHeart12 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Nov 3, 2007
    Messages:
    639
    Likes Received:
    0
    Someone posted a simular post to this on another forum I post on and I thought it was a good idea so teenages who want a baby can see what its like to be a Teenage mum.

    To see what its like to be a teenage parent you can borrow my little girl for the night so I can get some sleep and you can wake up every hour with her.
    :D

    Maisy is wonderful and I wouldnt change her for the world, I love her soo much but I do miss having more then 3-4 hours sleep a night, eating three meals, without her waking up and then having to settle her back to sleep and by the time I've done that my food ends up cold and I MISS not having my shower everyday.

    I don't regret having her and I wouldn't change my life but being a teenage mother comes with alot of responsibilities and can be hard work.

    X
     
  2. leckershell

    leckershell Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Dec 25, 2006
    Messages:
    6,947
    Likes Received:
    0
    I'm not a teen, I'm 22, 21 when I found out I was pregnant just over a year ago.

    I have lost contact with a lot of "friends" who don't have children so now other than the girls on here, I'm really quite lonely.
    I used to organise gigs to fundraise for charities, but now getting out of the house to do something for myself is a mission especially on a night out because I'm breastfeeding, and my OH works fulltime.
    Any job I have for the time being will be parttime... otherwise the additional childcare costs outweigh the point of working fulltime. This could put a hold on a career if you wanted one as I don't know of many parttime managers etc.

    Other than that I miss my sleep too! I wouldn't change a thing now though but be prepared it really is a complete lifestyle change, and don't expect your friends to stick by you.

    x
     
  3. MissSara

    MissSara Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Oct 10, 2007
    Messages:
    3,318
    Likes Received:
    0
    I was a mummy at 17 and missed alot of things like my 18th birthday party i was the only person there not drunk and acting silly, because having harrison just changed my life and made me grow up overnight.

    I always had a dream of moving away from home and living the student life, ya know being a poor student and living in halls, meeting new people and the wild partys. Instead i had to become mummy and now i do the access course for mature students......... hardly the student life, but i'll get there.

    I wouldn't change my lil soldier for the world although i would love to change the father..... But it was hard work.
     
  4. libs

    libs Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 13, 2007
    Messages:
    4,502
    Likes Received:
    0
    I was 19 when I had DS - I'd lived alone since 16 so thought it wouldn't be so different.

    I missed being spontaneous, and most of my friends lived far away so missed being able to drop everything and go and stay with them. Also when they come to stay with me - I felt I was nagging with the keep everything tidy, be home at a reasonable time when we went out, no drinking etc in the house.

    I also found it more difficult to get back into the workplace, this was before WFTC or even FC and no help with childcare - but I did it - and of course now I wouldn't change a thing. Although we're obviously wanting to start it all again - the advantage now is that I have an independant teen, so holidays, meals out etc etc are far easier to plan whilst most of my friends are now stuck at the toddler/small child stage - so I'm getting my own back :wink:
     
  5. Squiglet

    Squiglet Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 29, 2007
    Messages:
    8,899
    Likes Received:
    0
    I got pregnant with Tia at 19, had her a couple of months after my 20th birthday... so just missed the whole teenage bit... but most of my pregnant was when I was teenager...

    I think the worst thing is people looking down on you like you are scum of the earth... Medical professionals don't help you out and just say "You're just a panicky young mum, and don't know what you are doing!!"

    health visitors like to get more "involved" in things and assume you don't know what you are doing. :roll:

    And you have to fight every step of the way when your kids sick or ill just to be heard!.. If I had been respected, the doctors would have listened to my suspicions that my daughter had meningitis and my daughters speech problems would have been diagnosed earlier..

    Now I'm pregnant again and much older I can see just how badly I was treated because people are much more respectful of my opinions and wishes concerning this baby and raising this child. My parenting ability didn't have anything to do with my age, but everyone else thought it did.. :roll:
     
  6. zebrastripes

    zebrastripes Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jun 16, 2007
    Messages:
    3,703
    Likes Received:
    0
    I'm lucky in that I have an easy and goodnatured baby,so it's the small things that annoy me most.Now I'm back at school full time,for instance,I'm no longer Rebekah,I am The One Who Had A Baby. Goodbye being a person in your own right. It's so stupid.In Geography yesterday we were doing crude birth rate,ASFR etc,and I swear everytime the teacher said "baby" the entire class stared at me. Didn't help when my teacher went " I'm sure YOU know all about the economic cost of bringing up children!" Etc...etc...etc
     
  7. Skyla

    Skyla Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 19, 2007
    Messages:
    299
    Likes Received:
    0
    Now that I have Tira, things are very different...I'm back in school too and, like Rebekah said, people look at you in a different way. It's not at all fair but I like to think that most of them are jealous. I've got a beautiful baby daughter waiting for her mummy to come home while all they have to go home to is the TV. I've had to grow up pretty fast and prioritise, moreover, put someone else's little life way ahead of my own.

    Those people who were my friends before I became pregnant still are my friends, they seem to have stuck by me even though I often have to turn down invitations to go out since I don't get to see Tira much during the week, I love spending time with her on the weekends. So that is definitely a bonus I wasn't necessarily expecting.

    I'm very lucky that I have a briliant beyond brilliant support network (ie. family) around me to help out but it's still quite tough. When you're so young and taking on the upbringing of a baby you're pretty much being dropped in the deep end but, saying that, like most other mums out there, I wouldn't change my situation for the world. Tira is my life. Other girls my age may be having more fun than me but meanwhile, I'm learning life lessons and hopefully becoming a better, more selfless person all round.

    Life very often doesn't go according to plan but any plans you do make, you must be ready to chuck out because something better and unexpected might just come along to surprise you.

    "Life is what happens when you're busy making plans".
     
  8. mummysarah+co

    mummysarah+co Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 14, 2008
    Messages:
    438
    Likes Received:
    0
    Hi :wave:
    I had my 1st baby at 18, i found out i was pregnant at 17. i am now 21 with 2 children and im 31 weeks pregnant with my 3rd and im married. i was a single mum for a bit b4 i met my hubby and it was pretty hard going i lived in a top floor flat with my disabled boy so i never got out and my "friends" forgot i existed as i couldnt go out drinking when ever i wanted at the drop of a hat. everythings brilliant now as i have learnt to cope and ive learnt new ways of doin my daily chores.
    i missed out on my 18th and 21st birthdays being pregnant but my mum made it special in her own way - bless her, i was also pregnant during my wedding :doh: (which was 7 days b4 my 21st)
    i wouldnt change a thing as i love my children so much and they are my life but it definitely is not easy going!
     
  9. MagicMarkers

    MagicMarkers Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 23, 2008
    Messages:
    3,515
    Likes Received:
    0
    im 19 and pregnant, and just wanted to thank you guys for sharing your experiences, nice to hear other people experiences to sort of, gage whats coming my way x
     
  10. mummysarah+co

    mummysarah+co Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 14, 2008
    Messages:
    438
    Likes Received:
    0
    There are more good days than bad but its normal to feel a little low at times but with a good family network around you, you will do just fine. :D
    you have so many brilliant new things coming your way and you will learn your own way of doing things.
    good luck for the future!!! :hug:
     
  11. Strangeness

    Strangeness Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Feb 1, 2005
    Messages:
    2,791
    Likes Received:
    0
    I had my son at 19 and to be honest I don't miss not having the time to myself! Don't get me wrong it's always nice to have an hour here and there just to even do the washing but it's like I was destined for motherhood! I don't get to go out like my friends but it really doesn't bother me. I have a wonderful husband who luckily like me likes spending time at home. I'm now 21 and my son is 2 and a half and it's amazing to think we raised this gorgeous little boy. Age doesn't matter but maturity obviously does. If you enjoy having a social life and can't give it up and can't cope without sleep and can't cope with a little person counting on your 24/7 then I wouldn't have a baby but if you can overcome these hurdles then motherhood is the most amazing experience! We're due our second in July and I cannot wait! I feel a lot more prepared this time round!
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice