TO EVERYONE! READ....Lets clear this up shall we?....

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by -, Aug 12, 2005.

  1. Guest

    Jo has seen what was written in my c-section thread. And what I thought would happen has happened. This has shattered her confidence in everyone on the forum. You were all she had left. What you guys dont know about her family would really shock some sense into you heads. She really has NOTHING left now.

    http://pregnancyforum.co.uk/forum/viewt ... 9276#19276

    I just wanted to clear up what was said and to whoever said it. I don't really want to know who you are as it may stop me being anything less than ignorant to you on the forum.

    Just don't start rumers yeah?! For gods sake we are not children here who need to bitch on the playground about things we think are going on.

    People who I have a problem with or whatever, I have had it out with them on PM. Not the bloody chat room. If you need to ask anything - ask in PM - not the chat room where it is open, and certainly NOT the forum.

    I don't want to have hard feelings with anyone on this forum as we are all here for support and understanding which we should all deserve. I don't think some people are getting this though sadly.

    Please don't tell me who it was who said this - I don't think I could take it to be honest. Just whoever did say it - think about your actions and what they have now just caused.
     
  2. LucyBee

    LucyBee Well-Known Member

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    Sami,
    I didn't want to get involved but I am shocked!
    I can't believe that anyone would gossip about something like that.
    As you know I lost my baby at 7.5 weeks and I was devastated. I can't even begin to imagine what it would be like to lose a baby days after it was born.
    It is devastating and tragic and it makes me feel really sad to think that people would want to gossip over this rather than offer support and love.
    This forum is a site for help, care and understanding from other women experiencing the same things at a delicate and emotional time.
    Jo trusted this place would help her at what must be one of the worst times of her life and it has let her down.
    I'm sure the vast majority of people on this forum are honest and caring people and I can only hope that Jo will still come back here again.
    Whether the gossip happened or not, the post was tactless and thoughtless and I think you're right to have responded as you have.
    Lots of love Sami,
    Lucyx
     
  3. michelle82

    michelle82 Well-Known Member

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    Tell Jo we will miss her if she doesnt come back whoever said that was out of order and I've said this before too many people air their opinions about one another when they dont know each other, lets face it as much as we post on here the majority of people still dont know the real us and whats going on in our lives at a particular time. I come on here to chat to people who are going through the same thing as me. And If I went through what Jo did I would be v upset if someone slated me for lying. Give Jo our love, its such a shame people cant keep their opinions to themselves they need to grow up!
     
  4. Guest

    Thank you girls for your very kind messages, I'm sure if Jo could face coming back here she would like to read them, but i'll pass the message on.

    Lucy - I am as shocked as you. It is a very awful thing to have been said. The he-said-she-said-bullsh*t is not the sort of dispute I would normally get involved with, but Jo is very dear to my heart and this hurt me too.

    Thank you again Lucy, Michelle and Kayl.

    xx
     
  5. tracyM

    tracyM Well-Known Member

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    Jo, (or Sami if you could let her know)

    Don't let what a few people say push you away. I know there was a lot of gossiping in the chat room the other week, but I didn't stick around to know exactly what was said, or who it was about - I got the impression me and others were on the receiving end too. I hope I'm mature and sensible enough to make my own decisions without listening to playground gossip, and I think many of the young mums-to-be show a lot more maturity than some of the so-called grown ups. I've been back into the chat room in the last few days and the atmosphere was a lot nicer - Jo, you have lots of support in there, and you'll be welcomed with open arms.

    Hoping and praying that you'll find the strength to get through, Tracy xx
     
  6. littlebump

    littlebump Well-Known Member

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    I have to admit I hardly ever go in the chat room for exactly this reason - I feel there is a lot of bitching that goes on and I'm just not interested in it - it's exactly the sort of cowardly banter you might expect from playground bullies, not expectant mothers.

    I think people feel safer to say these things where there won't be a permanent record. Anyone who doesn't feel comfortable saying something on a permanent post should ask themselves whether they should say it at all.

    My rant is now over. Babydust to one and all :D

    LBxx
     
  7. -Cat-

    -Cat- Well-Known Member

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    Hi all,
    I would like to say a little something on this note. As a lot of you know I spend a lot of my time in the chat room here and so I hear a lot of the stuff going on, and I am fully aware of the things that were said about jo. It seems that a lot of damaging things have been said about a lot of people and its not nice. unfortunatly some people have lied or abused the site in the past (i.e Cactor! - who has been in labout about 4 times) it seems that a lot of alligations get thrown around and roumors start. I know from the fact I have been told to many and I get asked about them from other people who have heard things too. I would like to say that while I have relayed info to people who have been asking I have not been involved in the starting of any rumours. As a lot of you know there was an akward situation with dani recently, which was an awful shame and embarassment which has now thankfully been resolved and all is now well. Obviously the situation with Jo is a lot more serious and these rumors are a lot more harmfull. Unfortunatly its been rumours, gossip, complaints and disagreements that have led to this. As a result we have lost Kieren the midwife_online and LauraB our administrator herself upset about comments made about herself in the chat!
    I have decided to well and truly shut my ears of from now on to all rumors and gossip involving users. Might I suggest as well that in the future if anyone believes that another user is lying or abusing the site, that that PM Laura with the info and and evidence they have and let her deal with in an appropriate way instead of just relaying on the info in the chat.
    so from now on the only thing I want other people to tell me about other users is if they have gone into labour!

    And if people dont like other users then just dont chat to them! I know there will always be disagreements in opinions but hey keep them to yourselves and lets just be there for each other to offer support and advice!
     
  8. rach

    rach Well-Known Member

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    well said cat ive not been on the forum long and so far have found everyone to be very friendly and welcoming and the site is full of very useful advice for all stages of pregnancy and ppl ttc
    it would be such a shame if new ppl joining were to be put off by any arguing or nastiness on here, as everyone knows it can be difficult enough for some ppl to fit in when they are new as it is, and a lot of ppl who have been on here a long time might stop coming on if all they see all the time is arguing.
     
  9. Ragna

    Ragna Well-Known Member

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    Hi Sami

    Read your email and to be totally honest Im completely lost as to what has gone on but have kind of got the jist. I lost a baby at 11 weeks and that was devastasting enough without losing one at full term. It dosnt bear thinking about to be honest, to then be disbelieved (i think thats what you are saying) and gossiped about. Totally unbelieveable to be honest.

    As for Kieran the Midwife going, which is a major loss as I thought that what they had to say was always really constructive and helpful. Why are they not coming back ?? And the Trouble with Dani, I didnt really get either but always found her really great to chat to on the occasions that I have. Sad to say I have past experience of Gossips and nastiness in Chat rooms and an AOL chat room that I frequented for 4 years I do not enter EVER now. Althought the gossip was never actually aimed at me

    I rarely go in to this (pregnancy forum) Chat room as whenever I seem to chose to do so, its empty (just unlucky I guess) and from what has been said perhaps thats a good thing. Sad really that all the hard work and effort that laura has put into this site with so many members (over 1,400) that there are a few that have to spoil if for everyone else. You are right, its like being back at sodding school, and for me, that was a LONG time ago !!!

    Ragna xxxxx the ever growing bump !
     

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