Those without family nearby..

[KateK]

Hi all, i'm interested to hear from those who have had babies without having family around. I'm starting to think about the logistics of having number 2.. I have a 4 year old who will be at school by the time baby arrives. Our families live about an hour away which is fine, I would normally ask my Mum to come and help with Poppy but there is a strong likelihood that she will be up Kilimanjaro! (I'm due 29th Jan, she leaves 2nd Feb..) My partner's parents work and I wouldn't expect them to get time off to come and babysit.. We are fairly new to our area and any friends i've made aren't close enough for me to ask such a favour.. All that aside my daughter is very attached to me and she struggles to be away from me for long - i'm really worried about the impact on her, I don't want her to feel like she's been lumbered with whoever is available! How have you coped/what are your plans? xx

 

[MrsB2105]

We have family nearby, but having a planned section so we are keeping everything as planned and he will go to nursery that day etc. He knows that babies are coming but we are not telling him that morning so he doesn't feel as though he is being left elsewhere ... I'm sure your in laws would love to help if they can though, what about siblings etc? Could any of those help? X

 

[Nic_M]

I'm in the same boat as you, my mum is an hour and a half away and I had a quick labour with my first so chances are she won't make it in time this time. Chances are you will get friendly with some mums at the school when your lo starts so maybe you could ask one of them, that's what I am hoping to do x

 

[Syd43]

I got pregnant about a week after moving 6000 miles from all my friends and family Can't really help I'm afraid as I haven't worked out a plan yet. I'll be ok for help, I'm more worried about meeting people. This is my first pregnancy.

 

[BlondeP]

Maybe find a nice childminder/baby sitter? Have then over a few times so Poppy gets used to them and explain that once labour comes you will need their help with collecting her from school possibly and staying with her at home? That's what we had when my step mum went into labour years ago and I was little. It might be pricey but I'm sure you could come to a good agreement including her having the use of the kitchen for cooking dinner for the two of them and maybe offer her the spare bed for the night if it's a night labour? xxxxx

 

[KateK]

Thanks guys, gosh Syd that sounds stressful, it's so difficult getting to grips with a new area.. I was considering a home birth so I wouldn't have to worry about it but i'd still need someone there incase I had to go into hospital or something.. In that case the only person I would have there is my Mum (MIL is a big no no, love her but not in that situation!!) so even that's a no. Thanks Nic, yes my first labour wasn't slow and I know that second labours tend to go even faster.. Love the plan of palling up at the school gates! That's lovely in a sense that you know exactly what you're doing Mrs B (must be soon for you no?!!) and I agree I don't want her to know/feel like she's missing out on all the excitement! She's already asked so many times if she can be there I just dread to think how much that'd cost Blonde with overnight stays etc.. Also I just know it's going to be so stressful for her she's really going to need someone she loves there.. Eek it's so hard.. Thanks though ladies, loads of brilliant ideas xx