This is so much harder than I thought!

[Arya]

hey ladies

I'm new to all this TTC and this is my first post. I had no idea how complicated it all was, I mean I knew that TTC could take a long time and that it might not happen at all but I'm only just learning about fertile days etc. And the TWW is torture!!

We have only been trying for 1 cycle, currently I'm on CD33, AF usually arrives between CD28-CD31 but has been known to ocassionally be late by a couple more days, I am quite sensitive to stress and AF can be affected but always turns up. I really don't know how everyone does it, I'm already going a bit mad waiting. I took a digital test on Sunday when AF was due but it was BFN.

I feel I've had some symptoms I don't normally have but I could be completely imagining it. I've had mild-medium cramps every day since ovulation (guesstimate, going by my app at the moment - 18 Sept), as well as bloating. since AF was due I've felt dizzy/light headed and have a headache. I feel I've had PMT type symptoms for about 2 weeks which is not normal. We had sex on 16 and 19 Sept.

I know I have no right to feel impatient after only 1 cycle, but it's driving me nuts so had to speak to people who understand. Although we have only just started TTC, we have waited a while to get started as I've had some health issues (none that should affect TTC).

Any support or advice would be grately appreciated!!

Arya xx

 

[becsybabe]

The only way to really know is to take a test xx

 

[Arya]

Haha - I know, I did 2 days ago (BFN). I thought I'd leave more time before I take another one? My plan was just to wait for AF to arrive (or not). I should totally be in the pregnancy test manufacturing business, I'd be rich!!

 

[Keelygracey]

You have every right to feel how you feel.. I'm the same, I'm on my 5th cycle now and feel so bad complaining when you see other women who have been trying for so much longer but it doesn't make it any easier.. you still feel deflated and disappointment as each month passes. You just have to keep telling yourself that it can take time and even healthy couples can take up to a year to conceive.

Hopefully your be lucky and get a sticky bean right away but if not you have to just take the ups and the downs, if I've learnt anything it's that it's one hell of a emotional rollercoaster!! Good luck xxxxx

 

[Arya]

Thanks Keelygracey, that's exactly how I feel - no right to complain when other people have been trying longer. I didn't think I would be too bothered for the first few cycles, never mind the first, Knowing it can take a while, but I've been how shocked how awful I feel. OH is so laid back about it all.

I'm sorry you also feel this way and have had to deal with disappointment. You're right, all the stats out there say 1 year of trying is quite a normal amount for most people TTC. I'm quickly realising how much of a rollercoaster this is going to be. I have the upmost respect for everyone TTC!

I'm just glad there's a supportive forum like this to come to, I don't want to talk to friends at this stage.

Good luck to you too xxx

 

[Keelygracey]

Same here, no-one knows we are TTC. My OH is soo laid back too.. he just says 'Oh well, there's always next month!' And it drives me crazy!.. xx

 

[Arya]

We haven't told anyone either. Your OH sounds exactly like mine, no sweat 'oh well' kinda attitude which I wish I had! He was the same about the decision to start trying, I was excited/scared, he was just like 'yeah ok, let's do it' like I asked him 'shall we get a takeaway' lol.

 

[Keelygracey]

Lol! That made me laugh.. My OH had the same response, I was expecting a long thoughtful conversation - men! I wish I could be as chilled out as he was. How old are you both if you don't mind me asking? xx

 

[Arya]

Me too re the thoughtful conversation - or at least I expected him to do his usual, say no and then later on say maybe (he does this about most things).

I'm 32 and he is 31, what about you?

 

[Keelygracey]

Oh I had that too although mine said yes, then panicked then finally agreed lol We are both 27 but my OH thinks his still 18 lol xxx

 

[Arya]

Lol!! That's really funny. we discussed it a few times over the last couple of years, to which he said no, then maybe, then it was 'yes but not yet'. I didn't mind at first as I was dealing with some health stuff so I knew more time would mean it would be better for that. He also must think he's much younger as even when I decided I was ready lets not put it off anymore as it may take a while and I'm not getting any younger, he still said 'soon'. We had a big heart to heart, next time I asked he said yes

 

[Keelygracey]

Aw, That's sweet. I was also worried about how long it would take (although of course naive me thought it would happen right away!) my OH wanted to wait until January but I'm so glad we started when we did as I'm now CD1 of my 5th cycle. I just really want to get that BFP before Christmas.. end the year on a high! As each month passes you realise just how much you want it, at first I though I'd be really relaxed about it and not stress if it didn't happen.. that first month when AF arrived I cried my eyes out like a baby lol.. feel stupid about it now but it still makes me want to cry every time.. I think the fact that my OH is so blasé about it all helps cos He laughs at me for being an emotional wreak (which I usually am!) lol xx where r u in your cycle now?

 

[Arya]

Aw, That's sweet. I was also worried about how long it would take (although of course naive me thought it would happen right away!) my OH wanted to wait until January but I'm so glad we started when we did as I'm now CD1 of my 5th cycle. I just really want to get that BFP before Christmas.. end the year on a high! As each month passes you realise just how much you want it, at first I though I'd be really relaxed about it and not stress if it didn't happen.. that first month when AF arrived I cried my eyes out like a baby lol.. feel stupid about it now but it still makes me want to cry every time.. I think the fact that my OH is so blasé about it all helps cos He laughs at me for being an emotional wreak (which I usually am!) lol xx where r u in your cycle now?

Oh no, I completely understand you crying your eyes out! no need to feel stupid at all, it's so emotional. You'd think the would be more of a science to it in this day and age!

I guess part of me thought it would happen quickly too, I didn't think I thought that but I must have somewhere deep down. Yes, it's great you started when you did, and FX you will get your Christmas wish And yes, you're right, it is a good thing having a laid back OH, although it's frustrating sometimes it's also calming too. I've become a much calmer person in general because of my OH's laid back qualities.

I'm on CD33, AF was due on Sunday (my cycle is on average 29/30 days but does sometimes go over). I feel quite PMTy so I'm sure AF is coming...

 

[Arya]

Oh no, I completely understand you crying your eyes out! no need to feel stupid at all, it's so emotional. You'd think the would be more of a science to it in this day and age!

I guess part of me thought it would happen quickly too, I didn't think I thought that but I must have somewhere deep down. Yes, it's great you started when you did, and FX you will get your Christmas wish And yes, you're right, it is a good thing having a laid back OH, although it's frustrating sometimes it's also calming too. I've become a much calmer person in general because of my OH's laid back qualities.

I'm on CD33, AF was due on Sunday (my cycle is on average 29/30 days but does sometimes go over). I feel quite PMTy so I'm sure AF is coming...

Sorry, I didn't need to quote you!! Doesn't work properly on my phone, it's hard to navigate! Haha

 

[Keelygracey]

I really hope AF stays away for you. I use a forum app called tapatalk? It's so much easier then using the website on your phone. xx

 

[Arya]

I haven't heard of that app, I'll look into it, thanks!

CD34, still no AF, gonna buy some more tests today.

Xx

 

[snowbee]

Don't feel guilty for feeling impatient! No matter how long you have been trying it is still disappointing when a cycle is a fail.

My best advice is to keep busy, keep having fun and don't let ttc consume your life as you will make yourself and your oh miserable. Not always so easy to do but it does help.

I would also suggest stocking up on some cheap tests if you have a need to pee on something each cycle, it will be so much cheaper!

 

[Arya]

Thanks Snowbee! And congrats on your BFP!! Woop!

I went to superdrug and bought their own brand 10iu/l tests. Looked for some cheap ones but there's wasn't any, all quite expensive.

Took the test and pretty sure it's a negative, my OH thought he saw a very very faint line, but I think we're imagining it. It's very close to the edge of the window, not in the centre like it's supposed to be. Shoulda waited til the morning, but it did day if you are post AF to take it any time of day.

 

[snowbee]

Thanks, it has been a long four years coming so I hope this is going to be the one!

I buy my tests from amazon, 50 at a time lol!

Sometimes the lines are a bit wonky and not where you would expect, do you have a picture?

 

[Arya]

FX it all goes smoothly for you! I really hope it's your time.

I had a look on Amazon, but a lot of the cheap tests get bad reviews, what type/brand is it you buy?


No, I threw it in the bin, it wouldn't have shown in a photo. I'll test again on Saturday if AF still hasn't arrived. my longest cycle ever was 36 days (a one-off) and I'm currently on CD35 so that would be CD37 and very unusual. I've changed my diet recently so that could be causing the delay.


Xx