Scared to have sex

Discussion in 'First Trimester' started by Lilalylola, Mar 12, 2016.

  1. Lilalylola

    Lilalylola Well-Known Member

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    Hi everyone!

    I found out a week ago that I am up the duff again! Of course we are over the moon :)
    But sex stopped completely after my ovulation.
    I am to tired and just not really in the mood at the momen, but the main issue is that I am scared to cause a miscarriage, and when we do have sex I don't want him to cum inside me because I am scared the sperm will make my body start cramping and again loose the baby..
    My fear is irrational right?
     
  2. flexilexi394

    flexilexi394 Well-Known Member

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    Hey!

    I don't really know if there's any fact either way, but I carried on having sex as normal and still do! I don't think sex will cause a misscariage if its going to happen it will sadly, but I dont think sex influences it ( I could be completely wrong though!)

    xx
     
  3. scn

    scn Well-Known Member

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    Not at all, I think when you've suffered loss you are more protective of yourself and baby.
    Of course we know that sex is safe in pregnancy but if you don't feel comfortable doing it then don't. There are other ways you can maintain closeness and intimacy with your husband.
    I'm 15 weeks tomorrow and still have not had sex since conception, I remember from previous pregnancies the horrible cramps that happen afterwards and I'm still not ready to go there. Hubby and I don't have high sex drives anyway so it's not bothering us.
     
    #3 scn, Mar 12, 2016
    Last edited: Mar 12, 2016
  4. Prettypee

    Prettypee Well-Known Member

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    I share the fear. After my mc, i would have sex until 12 weeks.... My daughter was fine. I'm now 5 weeks apparently (dating scan booked for 3 weeks time) although according to ov date and lmp I'm 6+2!! It's my anniversary next Tuesday and we booked a really expensive fancy hotel (before finding out I was pregnant) and I am scared... Especially after the ectopic misdiagnosis.... I'm freaking out! Think we will just have to take things easy...
     
  5. Lilalylola

    Lilalylola Well-Known Member

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    Thanks everyone! Luckily my husband does not seem to mind it so much as he understands, but still I feel like I am letting my marriage down.. I know it sounds silly..
     
  6. MillersMissus

    MillersMissus Well-Known Member

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    The bleeding of one of out miscarriages occurred after having sex, so we have said we won't until 12 weeks. My oh was devastated, blamed himself so he is more than happy to leave it for now.

    It's very easy to be paranoid after losses and I did this on Friday. When out ectopic was found they kept asking about shoulder pain which I didn't have. Friday I had shoulder pain, so triage midwife sent us to EPU as a precaution. Luckily all is good and we have managed to see a heartbeat (we've never ever seen a heartbeat so we both cried like babies!!!). Got another scan in 2 weeks. Just take it easy and do what YOU think is right!! I'm not in work at the moment as I fee it's not the best place for me to be at the moment. I feel like a fraud but my oh begged me to take some time out xx
     
  7. Lolie14

    Lolie14 Well-Known Member

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    Our MC started the day after we had sex. I know people say sex is fine but I can't understand why they tell you to have sex to bring on labour if that's the case? Second time around I was too scared and refused to have sex until I was certain that baby would be fine if they arrived early - that was at 37+1 and sure enough baby arrived the next day! Regardless of what people say we made the right decision to wait.
     
  8. Rubyredslipper

    Rubyredslipper Well-Known Member

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    My midwife said it's absolutely fine to continue having sex throughout. We've done so a couple of times it I'm so tired I'm in bed by 9 most nights so he doesn't get a look in!!
    She even said they recommend it to bring on labour but not sure how I feel about that!!
     
  9. Aragon

    Aragon Well-Known Member

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    In both my pregnancies we've continued BDing. My first ended in mc in Sept but this one is fine! 12 week scan showed all was well. I would hate to go all that time without... Although obviously I would stop if advised. I find it even better! Stronger O etc... :blush: but overall love the closeness to my OH. My MW said it's totally fine, people go running whilst preg and that's higher impact.
    Each to their own though xx
     
  10. Aragon

    Aragon Well-Known Member

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    Wow! Amazing story!!! Xx
     
  11. russellmuscle

    russellmuscle Well-Known Member

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    Ummm I didnt wait, but I did take it and do take it a bit easy compared to what we are used to :blush:

    If I had recurrent mcs Id probably wait until after the scan tbf? Just incase something is being disrupted.

    Good luck this time sweets.

    xxxx
     
  12. Cherrybelly

    Cherrybelly Well-Known Member

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    I've had recurring mcs and so we'll prob wait until after first scan.. Will see if the mood takes me x
     

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