Firstly, I have to say that there is no excuse whatsoever for being rude or adrupt with anyone, but I feel I must play Devil's Advocate. . . .
The 16 week appointment has only recently come in - it used to be that you got booked - had a 12 weeks scan, had your 20 week scan, and then saw your midwife again after that. However the guidelines changed last year, and it is now recommended that all first time Mum to be's have another appointment around 16 weeks. Which is much better really as the gap between booking and 20 weeks is so long. BUT - although these extra appointments were introduced, no extra midwives or clinics were provided to accomodate them, so the midwives just had to squeeze them into their already packed clinics.
It can be really difficult to hear a baby at 16 weeks - even for us professionals, and none of my colleagues would even try at 11 weeks as it is nigh on impossible. For every one we might hear, you would have 20 or so women disappointed and worried that we couldn't. This in turn increased the pressure on the Early Pregnancy Units, and could mean that women who are going through the heartbreak of a loss are kept waiting longer, or worst case scenario, not even seen. I offer women the chose at 16 weeks, but make it quite clear that there is only a 50:50 chance of my hearing it. It is horrible though when I can't hear it and I always wish I hadn't even tried.
You should ave had your urine and BP tested though - no rationale for why she didn't so that. And unless you look like you are losing weight or really putting loads on, you will not be weighed again in your pregnancy. The evidence shows that it doesn't help determine fetal growth, and for women who have had eating disorders it can be very triggering and it can be damaging to women's body image.
The system is far for perfect - and like I say, there is never any need for rudeness or abruptness. But the fact of the matter is, there aren't enough midwives to provide all women with the care they deserve during pregnancy, and in some areas the midwives are working under impossible conditions. You should complain whenever you get less than the care you should - the NHS is more reactive than proactive, and unless women do complain and make a big noise about the failings, nothing will ever change. The Government will say they haven't got the money, but is yours and your baby's health less important than the banking system?
Rant over, I'll get me coat.......
I asked if she would listen to the baby's heartbeat for me and she refused, I know there is a chance she may not be able to hear it but I would have rather she checked. She was quite abrupt about it!!!! When I had my last baby the midwife always had a listen when I went for appointments. Also she didn't ask for a water sample or check my blood pressure which I found strange.
i find this hard to believe was she just there to write notes then silly women id complain also if i where you.
