really down..... dont know what to do

Discussion in 'Trying to Conceive' started by hayes, Feb 3, 2012.

  1. hayes

    hayes Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 31, 2011
    Messages:
    5,387
    Likes Received:
    0
    Hi everyone,

    Af came today, am so gutted, i know its the same for all of us on here but its really hit me hard this month. Ive done all i cud do and still no bfp. I feel like giving up, i just have this feeling deep down that its not going to happen for me and hubby. Its getting harder and harder every month to keeping going and esp since the new yr with my sis and her probs and now the girl at work.

    I feel such a faliure and feel like im letting everyone down each month. I dont what to do. Whether to just forget all about it(ntnp)or to just suck it up and keep going. Feel so sad.

    Michelle. x
     
  2. MissJuly10

    MissJuly10 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Sep 15, 2010
    Messages:
    13,875
    Likes Received:
    10
    Sorry to hear the witch caught you. :hugs:

    You're not letting anyone down hun. I guess it hurts more when you are working alongside someone who is where you want to be, and it makes AF's visit that much harder to take. That's understandable. Don't beat yourself up, maybe take a break from TTC for a while, it can really drain you emotionally and sometimes the stress gets to us and we need to take a break and just breathe.

    Do what feels right for you. :hugs:

    Have you been TTC for long? x x
     
    #2 MissJuly10, Feb 3, 2012
    Last edited: Feb 3, 2012
  3. CARNAT22

    CARNAT22 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Sep 20, 2011
    Messages:
    27,558
    Likes Received:
    0
    Michelle (((((big hugs)))))

    This was me earlier this week - after several BFN's over last weekend, I started spotting yet AF still took another 72 hours to show up!!!

    I was a hotbed of anger and sadness on Sunday / Monday (I confess to spending most of Sunday in tears :roll:)

    Statistically a 'normal', healthy couple actively TTC only have between 20-25% chance of getting pregnant each cycle. It's not easy to get preggers and patience is a very important virture [along with perserverance !!]

    I know what is going on with your sister makes this all that bit harder but you have to keep the faith - your time will come! You could still end up being bump biddies with your work colleague as well hun!

    If you don't mind me asking how long have you been TTC?

    xxxxxxx
     
    #3 CARNAT22, Feb 3, 2012
    Last edited: Feb 3, 2012
  4. Laura78

    Laura78 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 12, 2011
    Messages:
    507
    Likes Received:
    0
    Aww Michelle,big hugs to you. I don't even know what to say to make you feel better.
    But having a baby is what you really want so don't ever give up hope. It might not seem like it sometimes,but it will happen xx
     
  5. Clairabella

    Clairabella Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Oct 17, 2011
    Messages:
    1,403
    Likes Received:
    0
    Ohhh I'm sending you a huuuuggge hug!!!
    I am sorry AF showed her ugly face and I am sorry that you are feeling down why don't you and OH have a few days of pure indulgence that's what I do when I'm feeling down. Really spoil yourself .... Relaxing baths if possible have a nice meal or cook something that you really enjoy and then you might feel refreshed and ready for the next month ahead. i really hope March is your month Ive been following your posts and you have had a tough time xxx


    Sending lots of hugs xxxxxxx
     
  6. H_Savage

    H_Savage Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Feb 1, 2012
    Messages:
    227
    Likes Received:
    0
    So sorry, but please don't feel like a failure. It must be hard enough without punishing yourself for something you can't control. I second the idea of taking time out to really treat yourself - I don't know if you drink, but you could crack oPen something nice if you do - and just generally try to make yourself feel a bit better. One of my good friends has PCOS and tried for three years with nothing. Then she got pregnant and had a perfect healthy boy, so don't give up hope x
     
  7. hayes

    hayes Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 31, 2011
    Messages:
    5,387
    Likes Received:
    0
    Thanks girls,

    You have all made me feel a lot better. This will b my 9th month but my 10th cycle.

    I have had a good chat with my hubby and we have decided that we will still ttc but that we are going to relax(well me really!!)about it all.

    You guys are right my time will cum i wont give up but i will not stress anymore. The one good thing this month is that af turned up bang on time so fx i might b getting a regular cycle again.

    Oh and my best friend had her 20wk scan today and when she tx me we had a good chat and she told me all about when she was ttc and how af wud make her feel the same but it was worth it in the end so that made me feel better.

    Guna have a nice HOT bath now lol. I dont drink for other resons but gunna chill out with hubby this weekend and have just bked ourselves a meal out for valentines day so cant wait for that.

    Thanks so much for the support. dont know what id do without you guys.

    Michelle.x
     
  8. jules84

    jules84 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Dec 18, 2011
    Messages:
    909
    Likes Received:
    0
    So sorry your AF arrived, glad you r feeling a little more positive! xx
     
  9. ceebee

    ceebee Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Nov 15, 2011
    Messages:
    4,168
    Likes Received:
    0
    I'm so sorry to hear about af - it does get harder as time goes on and you think - will this ever happen?!! Good idea to try and relax a bit honey - I try to take my mind off it as much as possible, especially in the 2ww, but sometimes it's easier than others....

    I was reading one of carnat's posts earlier and she was saying how nice it was to just chill when you're not ov-ing or in your 2ww and it almost made me want af to come as I'm having such a stressfull 2ww! Anyway my point is, make the most of your time without stressing about ttc and use it to step back, renew your strength and find new ways of dealing with the rollercoaster of ttc... Big hugs and hope you feel better soon sweetie xxxx :hugs:
     
  10. MrsL84

    MrsL84 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Dec 1, 2011
    Messages:
    137
    Likes Received:
    0
    Hi Michelle
    So sorry af arrived, don't feel like a failure your not. Totally understand how it wears you down every month seem like spend every 2 weeks waiting for one thing or another. My baby girl was born sleeping in September at 5 1/2 months and I stupidly though that wouldn't be too hard to fall pregnant again and was desperate for bfp by her due date of Xmas day abs now here I am 5 months later still ttc after having a 39 & 38 day cycle , currently day 33 of cycle 3, consultant said I'm not ovulating and have got clomid ready for cd2. Sorry for long post but what am trying to say is don't give up, our time for bfp and to take a screaming healthy baby home will come (that's what I tell myself all the time to keep me going). Keep positive, easier said than done I know but it will happen, it has too :) xx
     
  11. netty

    netty Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 13, 2011
    Messages:
    18,554
    Likes Received:
    4
    Hey hun sorry the witch has come xx take this time to pamper yourself thats what I did I was so gutted I had a mini meltdown! But I have decided im gonna chill out and stop being a crazy opk lady, maybe i'll get to wee in a toilet and not a pot who knows lol xx

    Relaxing is the best thing ever to do when ttc....just so hard tho isnt it xx big hugs you will get there, we all will

    Sent from my U20i using Tapatalk
     
  12. melhoney

    melhoney Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 16, 2005
    Messages:
    1,257
    Likes Received:
    0
    I'm sorry your af kicked in, but as the others said, try to pamper yourself, i am a big fan of cheese and brownies... wierd combination, i know...don't ask lol!
    Glad you are feeling a bit better, we are all the same, the worst rollercoaster i've been on!
    Don't give up, your time WILL come.
    i think things happen for a reason, i don't know much about the whole thing with your sister but maybe it would have been worse for ger if u'd been preggers, maybe it would have been too stressful for your body to handle pregnancy at the same time...you know what i mean...i am sure you'll get preggers soon, when you expect it the least...well that's what i try to tell myself lol!
    ((((Hugs))))

    Mel x
     
  13. Poppy1987

    Poppy1987 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 19, 2011
    Messages:
    1,477
    Likes Received:
    0
    Hi Hun, sorry to read af arrived, I know how your feeling. Every month af arrives for me I feel like I'm letting hubby down. But it will happen for you just try and keep positive. I know it's hard to say but try and relax about it all. Good luck honey xxx
     
  14. cosmicgirl

    cosmicgirl Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Dec 27, 2010
    Messages:
    16,519
    Likes Received:
    0
    I understand how you feel. It's so hard :hugs: x
     
  15. vixxy86

    vixxy86 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Dec 21, 2011
    Messages:
    93
    Likes Received:
    0
    :hugs:big hugs to you hunni.

    Don't feel you've done anything wrong, it's not you atall. I think us women are too hard on ourselves sometimes. We feel as it's our bodies 'not doing as they should do' that we're to blame. Its so easy to blame ourselves but don't. I think we all have times like these....I had a few. But I'm a true believer in it will happen when it's meant to....
    Maybe take some time out for a few months. Still TTC but not thinking about it or trying too hard. That's what me and the OH are doing now. Hope you feel better soon hunni.
     
  16. hayes

    hayes Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 31, 2011
    Messages:
    5,387
    Likes Received:
    0
    Thanks guna take some time out of ttc and hopefully cum back a bit more calm relaxed and rested ready to try again. Of course i hope i dont see any of you again as u will all b in tri 1.

    Michelle. x
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice