OT - depression

Discussion in 'Baby & Toddler' started by Leah04x, Jul 12, 2013.

  1. Leah04x

    Leah04x Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 23, 2012
    Messages:
    2,718
    Likes Received:
    0
    So after numerous blood tests over the past year or so, my recent test has shown that my iron levels have now risen from 8.5 when Ethan was born to 12.5, which is considered normal. The doctors are now going down a different route as to why I feel so crap on a daily basis!

    I'm knackered 24/7, have no motivation to do anything, low mood most days, feeling anxious, no sex drive whatsoever, insomnia and never looking forward to anything. I'm also constantly worrying and getting myself upset about whether I'm giving Ethan a good enough life and whether I offer him enough as his mum.

    All this has been going on for the past couple of years, but I genuinely thought it was something wrong with me physically (hence all the blood tests) rather than mentally. I don't really have anything to be depressed about other than day to day life and the stress that it brings.

    After speaking to the doctor today, he thinks im suffering from depression/pnd and said nows the right time to start me on antidepressants (citilopram - sp?). I really feel like a failure for having to take these :( I'm only 21, have a lovely partner, an amazing baby and I feel like I'm letting them all down! :(

    Has anyone gone through anything similar?
    How did the antidepressants work for you?
    How long were you on them? And did you have any side effects?

    I'm really in two minds about taking them, but at the moment, I don't think I've got anything to lose. I feel like the worlds worst mum & partner :(

    Xxx
     
  2. busymummy

    busymummy Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 13, 2012
    Messages:
    1,181
    Likes Received:
    0
    Leah I'm so sorry you feel like this.
    I suffered from depression in my teens and had all the symptoms you have described. I was put on prozac and was on them for 6 years. They helped take me to a level where I could cope, but I still feel more could have been done, and after 5 years the effects seem to dwindle and I became more depressed, so I was put onto citalopram. I was only on those for 6 weeks when I found out I was pregnant so I stopped taking them. I then referred myself to a local mental health association, who provided me with a support worker, and I can honestly say it was the best decision I could have made. I don't know if there is anything like that in your area but if there is I could not recommend it enough. My support worker helped me understand better what I was feeling, and how to deal with how I was feeling. she would also take me away for tea and a cake for a few hours sometimes, and as crazy as it sounds, it really helped, I guess because it was taking me away from the mundane routine of every day life. I would say to take the anti depressants as I believe they do help, but having that extra support is essential imo.

    Please trust me when I say you are not a bad mum or partner. Depression is not something that is your fault. And it is not something to be ashamed of. If you want to ask me any more questions or just need someone to let off steam to, feel free to private mail me. I hope you are okay xxxx
     
  3. AmyQ

    AmyQ Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 8, 2012
    Messages:
    1,303
    Likes Received:
    0
    I was on antidepressants for about 5 years from my late teens. I never found ones that really worked for me. I did find that CBT and counselling were much better for me.

    I came out of my depression about 5 years ago but now my son is 11 weeks I fear I have slipped back into depression. I was very aware of this and have great support from my family.

    Medication works really well for some but don't be disheartened if the first set doesn't work and I recommend you ask about counselling or CBT too.

    I am going to try the mindfulness meditation route this time. Wish me luck and sending you hugs xxx
     
  4. Emamay

    Emamay Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Oct 7, 2012
    Messages:
    2,028
    Likes Received:
    0
    Sounds like depression to me, and it's seriously nothing to be embarrassed or ashamed of.

    Sometimes there's an obvious reason for depression, sometimes it's for a reason you are not consciously aware of, and sometimes it's the body itself - a chemical inbalance that makes you feel like the whole world is watching for you to mess up.

    Accepting that there's a problem is step one, and accepting treatment is step two.


    A friend of mine was on antidepressants, for over a year, and felt no better. She was unhappy all the time, would lash out for no reason, and the slightest thing wrong was a mountain to her.
    She's recently been diagnosed bi-polar, and was distraught for a week. Then the new, correct tablets kicked in, and she's a different girl. Happy, smiley, and takes everything in her stride.

    It may take a while to find the medication that works for you (be it tablets, therapy, whatever), but once it's right, it'll make the world of difference.

    Stick with it. Take care xx
     
  5. Tanya4beauty

    Tanya4beauty Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 15, 2011
    Messages:
    1,441
    Likes Received:
    0
    Hi Hun, I've felt the same as you but have felt a lot better for about the last 8 weeks apart from the insomnia. I've been put on a anti depressant too called dolsuphin (not sure if correct spelling!) to help me to sleep. I really wasn't keen on taking it either but it made me feel better instantly as it helped me sleep, however I now need to up the dose as I haven't slept properly for the last 4 nights. The sleeplessness alone makes me feel depressed and emotional and I think the two go hand in hand. I too have a very lovely life but sometimes things just get too much. Don't feel a failure, you didn't ask to feel like this. It just happens. Hope we both feel better soon xxx
     
  6. NavyLouise

    NavyLouise Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 18, 2012
    Messages:
    1,679
    Likes Received:
    0
    I have been feeling the same as you described for quite a long time, I've had depression and anxiety issues since my early teens.
    My GP diagnosed PND about 5 months ago and prescribed me Prozac, I went to the pharmacy and got them but just couldn't bring myself to start taking them.
    I think knowing what was going on made it a little easier for me to be less harsh on myself. I'm still struggling but there are beginning to be more good days than bad. I would take counselling if I could get it but there's been none available so I'm stubbornly plodding along.

    I think you should try the pills if you think they will help you, they obviously do help some people hugely. But make it your decision and see if there may be other help available to you.

    And definitely don't feel like you're a bad mother because you really aren't!!!
     
  7. Leah04x

    Leah04x Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 23, 2012
    Messages:
    2,718
    Likes Received:
    0
    Thankyou ladies, you're all amazing!

    I think it's worse because I can't pin point what's making me like this.
    My doctor didnt mention anything about counselling, but I'll definitely mention it when I go to see him in two weeks time

    Xxx
     
  8. SunnySue

    SunnySue Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 24, 2012
    Messages:
    3,235
    Likes Received:
    0
    So sorry you are having a tough time :hugs:
    I have no personal experience so cant really offer any advice but i can assure you that the way you are feeling right now does not mean you are a bad mother. You are a wonderful mum and you are seeking help for your problems which is something to be admired.
    These ladies know how you feel and, as always offer some sound advice and a friendly ear so please do continue to ask for support when you need it.
    Really hope everything works out and that you are feeling better soon x
     
  9. missyeovil

    missyeovil Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 9, 2012
    Messages:
    1,399
    Likes Received:
    0
    I was on Citalopram aged 11 for a couple of years and again from 17 until I found out I was pregnant(19). I never had any side effects despite being on a ridiculous dose of 80mg at one point. They did work for me (at lower doses than 80! It was circumstantial stuff that took me up to 80mg and once that was fixed I dropped the dose again). If you do decide to start taking the pills don't be disheartened if you don't notice a difference quickly, they can take a wee while to get into your system and start doing good, and also they tend to need to build up the dose a wee bit and it can take a bit of time.

    If you can get counselling do try it though! It didn't always work for me but there were times where just talking about how I was feeling and getting it out in the open really helped.

    Have you told your OH what the doctors have said? Talking to my OH about what was going on helped in the way that he was able to understand why I was being withdrawn or tearful or whatever. He picked up on changes in my mood before I did sometimes and meant he was always there with a cuddle when I needed it.

    I hope you feel better soon. Depression is a horrible thing but I promise it can get better. 2 and a half years ago I was in a horrible place but now I couldn't be happier :) :hug: xxx
     
  10. Karate Kid

    Karate Kid Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2011
    Messages:
    3,951
    Likes Received:
    0
    Massive hugs Hun, I know you are not looking for a compliment but you are an amazing mummy and in every picture that I see of your gorgeous boy he is so happy and that is testament to your hard work.

    I can't imagine what you are going through but I have been through eating disorders and I guess periods of depression. For me anti-depressants wouldn't have solved anything so I got myself to counselling and managed to work through some of my issues.

    This mummy stuff is so hard, you loose yourself completely and have no time for your own needs. I often joke that I am bottom of the food chain in our house hold but it's true.

    I hope you find your solution Hun, we will be with you every step of the way.

    Love Cx



     
  11. KarenC

    KarenC Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Nov 23, 2011
    Messages:
    2,113
    Likes Received:
    0
    Big hugs, sweetie. OH has been telling me for months to go to my GP about feeling just the same as you do. I know I am doing a good job with T, but I am so down and lacking in energy a lot of the time, I find everything really difficult... and this was before I fell pregnant with T, and before falling pregnant again this time. Please don't feel alone in this, and it is definitely not something to feel guilty about. You've done the right thing. I hope you find a way to help you feel better.

    now you need to kick my ass and tell me to go and get some help too...
    xxxxx
     
  12. ceebee

    ceebee Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Nov 15, 2011
    Messages:
    4,168
    Likes Received:
    0
    Oh hon, please don't think you're a rubbish person for having depression. I suffered from depression from the age of 14 so I was anti depressants for years when I was younger. You sound like you're much more together than I was - I used to get drunk and take drugs to try and deal with my issues... Also, being a mum, as much as we love our little ones can be so tough and I know you've struggled with Ethan, so it can really take it's toll. I mean, we're so busy looking after our little ones that we neglect ourselves and don't have time/energy to do things we need to do to make us feel good.

    I think counselling is a really good idea and also if you have the time to do any exercise, even like a brisk walk then that might help a bit. I think it's worth a try going on anti depressants. Seriously half the population or more have been on them at some point so you're just normal really!

    Big hugs and PLEASE don't beat yourself up. Maybe you don't have a physical illness, but depression is an illness just as real as anything physical xxx
     
  13. Leah04x

    Leah04x Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 23, 2012
    Messages:
    2,718
    Likes Received:
    0
    So I took my first pill at 7am this morning and I know the doctor warned me of possible side effects but Jesus Christ I am struggling! Not that I have any experience of this lol but I imagine I feel like a heroin addict that who hasnt got their fix! - headache, feel sick, dizzy, fuzzy head, shaking like a leaf & just feel a really weird feeling that my body isn't in sync with my brain.
    Cannot see me sticking to these! And these side effects can last weeks..

    To top it off, I've gotta go to work today :( waaaaa

    Xx
     
    #13 Leah04x, Jul 16, 2013
    Last edited: Jul 16, 2013
  14. AmyQ

    AmyQ Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 8, 2012
    Messages:
    1,303
    Likes Received:
    0
    It's tough but try and stick with it as long as you can - just watch out for loss of appetite, you definitely need your strength with a LO. From what I remember the side effects don't usually last for weeks, your body just needs to adjust to them.

    Big hugs xxx
     
  15. Leah04x

    Leah04x Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 23, 2012
    Messages:
    2,718
    Likes Received:
    0
    Thankyou lovely! Doctor told me anything up to 3 weeks, but I'm hoping less!!
    Luckily, the side effects have worn off during the course of the day and I don't feel too bad now. Good job, because I was ready to chuck in the towel this morning - I felt worse than I usually do! xxxx
     
  16. Gayle30

    Gayle30 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 2, 2012
    Messages:
    5,484
    Likes Received:
    0
    Sorry your struggling sweetie. One bit of advice id give you is to take your tablets after food. They made me exactly like that when I had them on an empty tummy. I didnt know and felt like death for werks. But hang in thrre. Xxxxxxx

    tapatalking
     
  17. ceebee

    ceebee Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Nov 15, 2011
    Messages:
    4,168
    Likes Received:
    0
    Yeah, the side effects can really get you but they never lasted long for me, so fx they won't for you. If you're really struggling, could you break the pill in half and start on a lower dose, then build up slowly? Good luck and remember that not all drugs are right for everyone so if this one isn't right for you, you may find another suits you better. Hang in there xx
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice