CH0C0H0LIC
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- Apr 22, 2008
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Well most of you have probably read that I have panic attacks/depression/anxiety and have also been diagnosed with gestational diabetes.
Well my anxiety levels rose after being diagnosed with diabetes to the point where I couldn't think straight, was constantly tearful/having morbid thoughts re baby's health and it was setting off my depression.
I decided that for a short while I would continue with the VERY strict diet I am on/continue with the tablets as prescribed and attend the regular growth scans so they can monitor babys size but knew I could not physically take my blood prick test as that was seeming to be the thing that was setting me off (6 times a day I had to do this) and at my 22w appt I could not have my bloods done so I told my consultant who obviously wasn't happy and gave me a lecture on neglecting my unborn child. I understand where she is coming from and obviously in my 'stable' state I fully agree that closely monitoring my diabetes is important. My partner has been worried that all the stress was heading me down the suicidal route and he is scared he is going to lose us both.
My consultant has written a letter to comm mw/gp etc but not sent a copy to me so no idea what it contained. I got a phone call this afternoon telling me that I'm being classed as refusing treatment and they are referring me to child protection if I don't do as I'm told. I explained that I was not refusing treatment but asking for space to reduce my anxieties so that I was able to continue with appts/blood testing asap. Have been told that if I don't agree to do what they say a social worker will be contacted. No-one has even once thought about me in all this, Obviously I don't want my unborn baby to suffer but just needed a few weeks or so to adjust and get back on track.
So scared I'm gonna lose my 10yo son and my baby when he's born now that my stress/anxiety levels which were coming down nicely (improved so much that I tested my blood levels this morning for the first time which was a big achievement for me) have now shot up to the point of mania. Told OH that we needed him to adopt son officially quickly cos I was considering moving away til things have died down, which is a stupid idea I know (before you lot say it lol)
Don't know how much more I can handle tbh - getting tired of fighting my 'inner demons' and truly feel i'm losing grip now.
Don't expect anyone to answer but just needed to vent a bit sorry
Thanks for listening girls, this forum is all i got right now as slowly becoming more and more housebound.
Sarah xxx
Well my anxiety levels rose after being diagnosed with diabetes to the point where I couldn't think straight, was constantly tearful/having morbid thoughts re baby's health and it was setting off my depression.
I decided that for a short while I would continue with the VERY strict diet I am on/continue with the tablets as prescribed and attend the regular growth scans so they can monitor babys size but knew I could not physically take my blood prick test as that was seeming to be the thing that was setting me off (6 times a day I had to do this) and at my 22w appt I could not have my bloods done so I told my consultant who obviously wasn't happy and gave me a lecture on neglecting my unborn child. I understand where she is coming from and obviously in my 'stable' state I fully agree that closely monitoring my diabetes is important. My partner has been worried that all the stress was heading me down the suicidal route and he is scared he is going to lose us both.
My consultant has written a letter to comm mw/gp etc but not sent a copy to me so no idea what it contained. I got a phone call this afternoon telling me that I'm being classed as refusing treatment and they are referring me to child protection if I don't do as I'm told. I explained that I was not refusing treatment but asking for space to reduce my anxieties so that I was able to continue with appts/blood testing asap. Have been told that if I don't agree to do what they say a social worker will be contacted. No-one has even once thought about me in all this, Obviously I don't want my unborn baby to suffer but just needed a few weeks or so to adjust and get back on track.
So scared I'm gonna lose my 10yo son and my baby when he's born now that my stress/anxiety levels which were coming down nicely (improved so much that I tested my blood levels this morning for the first time which was a big achievement for me) have now shot up to the point of mania. Told OH that we needed him to adopt son officially quickly cos I was considering moving away til things have died down, which is a stupid idea I know (before you lot say it lol)
Don't know how much more I can handle tbh - getting tired of fighting my 'inner demons' and truly feel i'm losing grip now.
Don't expect anyone to answer but just needed to vent a bit sorry
Thanks for listening girls, this forum is all i got right now as slowly becoming more and more housebound.
Sarah xxx