Not sure I can cope...

Discussion in 'Baby & Toddler' started by Kbex, Feb 17, 2012.

  1. Kbex

    Kbex Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Dec 15, 2011
    Messages:
    329
    Likes Received:
    1
    My husband has just left me. Been having a hard time on and off for ages. ThAt joke about mil's recently was so true. In my husband she has made him feel so guilty, insecure and self pitying. He has now left us saying we are better off without him. My toddler is ill and I came back from the doctors to a note Nd his keys. I am sat here trying unsucessfully not to cry and have no one to talk to. My mum passed away three years ago and was my best friend and I miss her so much and now need her more than ever.
    Sorry I know theres nothing you guys can do I am just so tired, upset and feel so alone.
     
  2. beanster

    beanster Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 19, 2010
    Messages:
    770
    Likes Received:
    0
    really really sorry hun. You know we are all here for you to rant, cry,talk to any time. Can you contact you oh or any of his friends who could talk to him?
     
  3. Lilelephant

    Lilelephant Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Feb 3, 2010
    Messages:
    13,225
    Likes Received:
    0
    Is there a friend u can ing to come over ? :hugs:


     
  4. lewisca

    lewisca Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 7, 2011
    Messages:
    1,798
    Likes Received:
    0
    Oh Hun hope things work out for u ! Can u not arrange to meet up with him talk things through ? We r all here for u hun xxx


     
  5. pinkyprincess

    pinkyprincess Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Oct 21, 2010
    Messages:
    10,660
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gosh that's a shocker are you ok? I'd ring someone to come over you need a shoulder! We're all here for a rant if you need to!


     
  6. JoS

    JoS Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 25, 2011
    Messages:
    264
    Likes Received:
    0
    So sorry to hear this, I hope we can all support you as much as we can xx
     
  7. Kbex

    Kbex Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Dec 15, 2011
    Messages:
    329
    Likes Received:
    1
    Thanks ladies. Not really ok but luckily the eldest is too young abd too little to realise I am crying. At least with her being ill she just wants lots of cuddles. Plus she refuses to nap at home now but is drifting off. That gives me a bit of time to digest it And just concentrate on baby. Not sure this stress is good for my milk supply though. Struggling with who to call to come round at moment as everyone either going away for weekend, at work or got half term plAns. Plus not ready to tell people. He's threatened it on and off over last few years as whenever I challenge things he's done he goes on the defensive attack. He then does his usual 'I don't deserve you.... You are better off without me' self pity. This time he has gone further though probably because I am not in the mood to pander to it. He's just sent me a text asking to see our eldest later. I replied that he could and that he could also see put youngest too. Part of the argument has been around the youngest as he isn't that interested in her. He forgot it was her injections and 8 week check yesterday and never asks about her. It's not helped by the fact he spent his weeks paternity leave ill in bed so never saw her. He was then ill but working do barely saw her. Plus he has been so busy at work for the last few weeks apart from the odd few mins. He hasn't seen the children at all apart from two Saturdays and one Sunday afternoon. So I am exhausted dealing with the two of them day Nd night. The final straw to s week of smaller things was when he went out on a work thing last night. Having been away for tri nights this week. He got really drunk. Woke me up banging around downstairs on and off all night. He knew our eldest was ill yesterday and I told him yesterday morning I was struggling to cope. At 5am I came down to get the eldest water. Told him she was burning up. He said 'oh' then went back to sleep on the sofa. I settled eldest but for only 30 mins and then she was in bed with me. Sent him a couple if texts telling him he needed to act more like Z father And husband. Hes just so selfish. I know he's having a busy and hard time at work but I am fed up with him not thinking about us at all. In the argument this morning he needs to decide if he wants to be a single man and carry on putting himself first or whether he can think about us. As you can imagine lots was said but I never lose my temper in arguments. I don't think I am being unreasonable am I? His solution is to just run away. On one level he will almost be pleased as he doesn't think he deserves us so will now think he's right. Nothing else I can say to him as been almost here so many times. He has been to counselling. I want him to do cognitive behaviour therapy but whilst he says yes he's not done anything about it. Sorry long post... Just getting it off my chest x
     
  8. Pinkprincess23

    Pinkprincess23 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 20, 2011
    Messages:
    220
    Likes Received:
    0
    So sorry hun. Is there someone that could look after the children while yous had a chat and put your cards on the table and both express what you want?

    S
    xx
     
  9. ChrissieCool

    ChrissieCool Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 17, 2011
    Messages:
    3,422
    Likes Received:
    0
    So sorry to hear that, hugzzzzz
     
  10. Sarah13

    Sarah13 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2011
    Messages:
    8,622
    Likes Received:
    0
    Oh you poor thing, you must be so stressed. Men can be so immature and selfish sometimes. Maybe him not being there will give you some space to get your own thoughts together about what you want too, not just him. Do you have any family you could spend the weekend with to help with the children and be a shoulder to cry on? Or a good friend? I'm sure they will want to be there for you so don't worry about them having plans etc, I know I would drop stuff for my family or friends if they needed me. And you can off load to us lot as much as you like x
     
  11. ForestLas80

    ForestLas80 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 5, 2011
    Messages:
    1,699
    Likes Received:
    0
    Oh my goodness that's so awful. I'm so sorry to hear what's happened to you. Wow your husband really needs to stop being so selfish, he's been quite shocking. I hope a friend can come over and help you get through this xx
     
  12. Olive

    Olive Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jun 16, 2010
    Messages:
    8,174
    Likes Received:
    0
    So sorry chicky :hug: You're at the right place for some girly support and chat x
     
  13. LaurenMM

    LaurenMM Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Feb 5, 2011
    Messages:
    1,763
    Likes Received:
    0
    Really hope you're ok hun :( I agree with what Sarah13 said. Maybe this space could help you? You sound so lovely and you're being treated so unfairly, you do deserve better. xxx.
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice