Not sure how I feel :(

Discussion in 'Relationships' started by jadelouise123, Jul 13, 2013.

  1. jadelouise123

    jadelouise123 Active Member

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    Hi all :)
    So I'm 21 engaged and live with my fiancé been together 4 years, we currently live in a flat but moving into a 2 bedroom house next couple of weeks,
    We lost a baby last June when I was early on, I got depression really bad n tried to commit suicide, my partner n i agreed it was best for me to have the implant, my mum sister n brother live in a safe house (dad was abusive to us) so haven't really got much of a family anymore as I hardly see then,
    So enough detail about my life lol,
    Basically I want a baby soo bloody bad! I'm a nursery nurse so that doesn't help but every where I look I see baby's or pregnant women I just want me own little family and a little bundle of joy I can love and they can love me unconditionally too, I know it sounds daft but since losing one and trying then having implant I feel useless, my partner doesn't want a child yet, he wants to wait till another 3-5years but I'm so desperate to start one :( I don't know if its because I haven't got much of a family or what :(
    Arghh it's so frustrating! Lol
    Thanks for reading, just needed a little moan haha
    X
     
  2. snowbee

    snowbee Well-Known Member

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    Hi,

    Sounds like you have been though a lot, well done for getting this far. I know it is very difficult wanting a little one and seeing them all around, it seems as though everyone has what you want. Have you been having help with your depression? If not I suggest you ask for help, there are so many people out there who can help you and who have been there and know what you are going through.

    If your partner isn't ready for a baby yet then don't pressure him too much. You are going through a stressful time already, try to enjoy your move and enjoy some couple time. You can always agree to reassess your baby situation in a couple of months time. How about focusing on decorating your new place or do a bit of wedding planning to take you mind away from starting a family? There are so many things that you can enjoy with your partner right now.

    Please don't take this the wrong way, but you can't know that your future child will love you unconditionally. While I am sure you would love them unconditionally as a parent you can't expect that from a child. You have to earn their love and respect as they grow. If you are searching for love then you need to focus on your relationship and on keeping in contact with your mum and siblings.

    Good luck and stay positive, hugs :)
     
  3. zogs84

    zogs84 Member

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    i agree with snowbee, you have been through a lot, i have a friend who is desperate for a baby, but it think like a lot of things in life, without sounding too philisophical, the more you want and say "why cant i have?" and "i want this so badly!" the harder it becomes, try and enjoy things how they are and believe you will get pregnant when its the right time. I know myself with my little boy i want to give him what i didnt have, i think thats natural. Like a lot of things, they seem to happen when you least expect because you let them happen instead of forcing the issue. good luck, and we all love a moan its good to get it out of the system :D
     

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