New Year's pregnancy announcements - from OTHER people

[margaret]

Hi All and Happy New Year

When phoning around after midnight to wish people well I got not one but TWO announcements of upcoming 2008 babies. I cried for about an hour, had a fight with my husband about our TTC and then went to bed.

Is anyone else experiencing this? Other people think that this is just the right time to announce that they're pregnant and it just hurts you a little more because it's New Year's?

And it's so ridiculous--I am actually feeling MAD at one of the couples who got pregnant. It's their fourth in five years and obviously they have no problems getting or staying pregnant. Why do they get four and I can't even get ONE?

Rant over. Anyone feeling the same way?

 

[skairdykat]

Although I've not had any of our friends announce their PG I can totally understand how you feel as a couple had babies last year and it sucks But then I felt guilty for feeling that way lol. I felt a bit sad just b4 midnight thinking that it's a year gone and still no BFP (I came off the pill last Jan but didn't start TTC till April).

I'm sure we'll all have our babies for Xmas this year hun

 

[Steelgoddess]

Oh hon

Its compltly natural to think its unfair, I often thought why them and not me and you feel like you want an off button for Pregnancy anouncements until you're pregnant...

I think its harder about special times of year like christmas or nye because its extra good news...

I took comfrt in reading about how others had had no luck for a long time in ttc or had miscarriages and then went on to have a beatiful baby. One day we will too

xx

 

[Kittykins]

I know how you feel, and yes it's hard - but wouldn't you do the same? If I'd had my BFP just before Christmas, or the 12-week scan on the 29th December, I know I'd have told all the family on Christmas Day, or all my friends on New Year's Eve.

It is difficult - I spent NYE with DH, two couples with 6-month-old babies, and another couple who are expecting in March, all friends from university. Another friend was also present - he's single, desperate for a girlfriend and to settle down. Every time I looked at the babies or the bump, feeling pangs of envy, I realised that our other friend was as equally hungry for what DH and I take for granted. It'll all happen in good time - we just have to trust to that, and make sure we appreciate what we do have. I don't know what I'd do without DH...

 

[xJodieLoux]

I can totally understand how you feel. We were TTC for 10 months and a about 4 months before I got my BFP my OH's cousins (his cousin from his dads side and his cousin from his mums side are engaged, seems abit strange that two of his cousins are engaged to each other but oh well) announced they were going to start TTC and I was totally devastated, I was convinced they would conceive before us. And then everytime we had family get togethers I thought there would be an announcement but there wasnt. And then one day OH was talking to his male cousin and he said they hadnt started TTC yet because she keeps changing her mind.

Anyway, we announced our pregnancy on christmas day and she ignored us all day and I kept feeling bad thinking if they were actually TTC she would be so upset and it probably ruined her day. But last night she was fine, and I dont think they have been TTC. But I have a feeling they will have an announcement to make of their owm at some point this year. Just like you will too.

 

[Loola]

Casting my mind back to almost a year ago, I was desperate to start TTC but my OH was not ready. This was getting me down so much as my broodiness was taking over my mind. Then in early January my best friend emailed me saying that she was pregnant. I was gutted for 2 reasons, firstly because she had only been with her boyf for 1 month, he was only 19 bless him and this was his second child with 2 different mothers, and he had been led to believe that she was on the pill when she wasnt, so I felt angry with her for being so irresponsible. Secondly, I was jealous of course because I wanted to be pregnant, and now she was having her second child and had none. I just thought I havent got the ability to be that selfish or irresponsible, and I was angry with myself for not just taking what I want out of life like others do.

Then a week later my other best friend called to say that she was pregnant too! She was pregnant within a month of having her first!! Again I was gutted, I had been wanting a baby for so long and she has had 2 in the time that I have wanted 1!

After this announcement I went through a period of depression. I felt so angry with my OH for not wanting a baby yet. In retrospect I must have been a nightmare to live with. Its just so hard when you want something so much but you have to rely on someone else to help you get it. Im a very independant woman too, Ive never relied on a man for anything!

Finally after a couple of months I pulled myself out of feeling sorry for myself and started focusing on my career instead. I didnt mention babies at all, and just came to terms with the fact that I would have to wait until he was ready.

Then May came and my OH unexpectedly woke me up one morning and told me that he was now ready to start TTC. The night before we had been babysitting for my Niece and Nephew. My OH told me that he had watched me play with them and saw how good a Mum I would be and that he had always wanted kids with me but he had just been so scared, it was the realisation that he was really a grown up now and had to start really sorting out his life. I was so happy of course. We have been trying ever since.

I still have pangs of jealousy, especially as one of my colleagues got pregnant the first month of trying, and everyone coos over her growing tummy, but Im not half as bad as I was because at least now we ARE trying, and we will do everything in our power to make it happen. Im sure it will be worth the wait.

 

[Jollypops]

Hi Margaret,
As a newbie i just wanted to send you a hug and say the many words you've heard before which is it will happen one day. My partner and i have been trying for 12 years with no joy and last year had our first attempt at IVF at which they only managed to collect 4 eggs, one of which didnt survive, one went funny! and two grade 1's were put back but they didnt take. This all happened in October 07, so decided enough was enough, come off vitmains, folic acid, drank red wine, beer and started to laughing again with friends (all of which have children bar one), and purchased a clearblue ovulating monitor and test sticks, started this in december 07 and i found out on new years eve that i am now pregnant!
I'm trying not to get excited as its still early days but i cant help it and i really don't want to upset you anymore but just to maybe give you a little hope that it can happen

 

[notty]

I know how you feel too. I'm trying for my first and since i have been trying it seems that most women around me have become pregnant. I'm actually meant to be visiting friends tonight to see their new born baby but i've told them i'm ill because i can't face it. It is hard but you're not alone. And it's good to have a good damn whinge about it occasionally

 

[Loola]

Hi Margaret,
As a newbie i just wanted to send you a hug and say the many words you've heard before which is it will happen one day. My partner and i have been trying for 12 years with no joy and last year had our first attempt at IVF at which they only managed to collect 4 eggs, one of which didnt survive, one went funny! and two grade 1's were put back but they didnt take. This all happened in October 07, so decided enough was enough, come off vitmains, folic acid, drank red wine, beer and started to laughing again with friends (all of which have children bar one), and purchased a clearblue ovulating monitor and test sticks, started this in december 07 and i found out on new years eve that i am now pregnant!
I'm trying not to get excited as its still early days but i cant help it and i really don't want to upset you anymore but just to maybe give you a little hope that it can happen

Wow! Congratulations on your BFP!! That Im sure will give alot of us on here great hope

 

[Jollypops]

Thanks Loola, i'll help and support anyone i can and anyone who wants it!
Although its taken so long we are still only young (me 31 and hub 39).

It will be his 40th, our 10th wedding anniversary, hopefully the arrival of a bouncy baby that will arrive in the 2nd year of both of our nans birthdays who passed away within a week of each other 2 years ago as well (Hope your keeping up!)