New, Single and 21 weeks pregnant

Discussion in 'Pregnancy Chat' started by Mum2beMarch17, Oct 16, 2016.

  1. Mum2beMarch17

    Mum2beMarch17 New Member

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    Hi all,

    I'm pretty new to those kind of Forums but I thought I'll give it a try.

    I'm 29y from Scotland, 20 weeks 4 days today feeling finally better after a pretty exhausting first trimester.
    Had a growing scan last week which showed I'm going to have a wee baby boy due 02.03.17:dance:

    Baby's Dad and me were right in our dating time when I fell pregnant.
    As we used protection (condom) and we never realized something happened, we never expected anything like a pregnancy.

    We got on very well and he has been there so far BUT he doesn't want a relationship.
    He will take care about the Baby, happy becoming a Dad BUT again he doesn't want me.
    I suffered a lot at the beginning as I know he has feelings for me (he told me) but he doesn't want anything for the sake of a baby. On one hand he is right and I didn't want him to stay just because but it's hard if you can tell he still likes you a lot (he is very emotional and likes being close to me).

    I guess a big point is his family. He hardly told anyone and when he told his mum which is pretty close to him, she wasn't happy or supportive and got angry with him.
    In my opinion she should be really really proud about her son taking care about me and the Baby. He's a growing up man.
    But because I don't know exactly how this talk went I can't and won't judge anyone from his family and would love my wee baby to be a part of them one day.

    I'm on my own here as my whole family lives in another country.
    I'm starting to worry how I'm going to deal when completely on my own but I'll somehow:roll: I'm working full-time which helps to distract me a lot but I do miss him.:roll:

    I hope to get to chat to some other women here:wave: sorry for my long text

    Cheers Mum2be
     
  2. becsybabe

    becsybabe Well-Known Member

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    Hiya firstly congrats on your little bundle. Half way there how exciting. You can do this and although you feel alone now as soon as you hold your little baby boy othing else will matter. Iv got 3boys already and they are just ace. I'm only 10w5d with my 4th and my god it's been awful I feel so ill so hoping that gives up soon. There are lots of ladies on here to offer support :) xxx
     
  3. Mum2beMarch17

    Mum2beMarch17 New Member

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    Thanks Becsy:) I just feel so lonely on those sunday autmn afternoons realizing he doesn't will feel the kicks etc.
    But his loss not mine, I try to keep that in mind.

    Oh I hope you feel better soon. Have you got any appointments or scans soon??
    xxx
     
  4. becsybabe

    becsybabe Well-Known Member

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    Ye I C an understand that but it most definately is his loss. Iv already had an early scan at 7 weeks due to my ruptured ectopic last year. Luckily this time baby is in the right spot :) Iv had my booking app and I have my dating scan on the 26th so very excited about that it will show that all the sickness is all worth it when I see an actual baby on the screen since at 7 weeks it was just a blob with a little heart beating. Xxx
     
  5. Cameron2010

    Cameron2010 Well-Known Member

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    I'm in the same situation as you. 25 years old, also from Scotland. I fell pregnant by accident but my OH and all his family were absolutely elated, I've never seen him so happy. Heartbreakingly, I miscarried in the second trimester in February this year, he was absolutely devastated and it tore him apart. We realised how much we wanted a family together and started actively trying. I've had three early miscarriages since. Every time I fell pregnant he was ecstatic. About three weeks ago, he decided he was leaving me. Said he didn't want to be with me anymore, can't imagine being with me forever and wanted to go traveling etc. Well I've just found out I'm pregnant again a week ago. It seems to be sticking this time with my hcg levels progressing well. I really thought he would come back as I thought it was maybe just everything we've been through as he took it really hard, but no he still maintains the same position. He said he is happy I'm pregnant and will be there for the baby but that it's over for good and we will never get back together. I don't know how to cope with it, I can't believe he's left me in this position. It seems so unfair, we have desperately wanted this for a year and now that we have come close to having it, he's changed his mind. We should be over the moon right now and all smitten and excited but instead I'm terrified, heartbroken and feel so lonely. I also worry about how lonely I'm going to feel going through the pregnancy, I imagined him there helping me through it and being there for every little kick and the way he was before kissing and talking to my bump etc. And I am absolutely petrified about how I'm going to cope as a single mum to a newborn. I already have a 6 year old who's dad takes nothing to do with him. I also worry so much about what people are going to think aswell, single mum, 2 kids to two different dads. In actual fact I've been in long term relationships with both but people won't think that way. And I feel like I've been robbed of what I've always wanted of having a proper little family, now I won't be able to meet someone and settle down with them and have a family with them. I thought he was the one I was doing that with :( Sorry I completely just spoke about myself there but just wanted to rant lol and also let you know I'm in the same position x
     
    #5 Cameron2010, Oct 17, 2016
    Last edited: Oct 17, 2016

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