Nasty comments.....

Discussion in 'Trying to Conceive' started by vixxy86, Jan 25, 2012.

  1. vixxy86

    vixxy86 Well-Known Member

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    Me and my other half have been together for just over 8 months and TTC for about 5. Our families think its' fab! we all get on great!!.....me and him are just meant to be. I came out of a 6 year relationship where I thought i'd lost the man of my dreams but my OH now is amazing!! I have never been so happy or felt so loved!! He is the perfect man, He has faults of course but I trust him, completly love him and wanna spend my life with him. It feels right. Its all moved quickly but feels right. We live together too.

    I confided in my friend about TTC and she was not nice making comments about the fact we only been together for 3 months!! Thing is I have PCOS and could take up to 2 years and still might not happen, by then i'll be 29 and if i need 'help' i dont wanna be in my 30's starting anything! Does it all make sense. Maybe I am wrong for TTC so soon, I dont feel I am. I love him and him me and it feels so right!! :(
     
  2. CARNAT22

    CARNAT22 Well-Known Member

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    I think your friend means well hun - maybe her phrasing was a little off though!

    My OH and I moved in together very quickly BUT we'd been together almost 4 years before we started TTC. We had all of our fun (but also wanted to be financially stable) before we decided to start a family!!

    I appreciate that it could take up to two years to conceive BUT why not look at it like the longer it takes to concieve the more time you get to spend one on one with your amazing OH?

    xxxxxxxxxxxx
     
    #2 CARNAT22, Jan 25, 2012
    Last edited: Jan 25, 2012
  3. cosmicgirl

    cosmicgirl Well-Known Member

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    Hmm I think you're friend could have had more tact but I kinda see what she is saying (sorry)People are often in such a rush to make such life changing decisions and I do think that children should be born into long term relationships (sorry again)
    I must admit when I go onto forums and see "we've been together 3 months and got our BFP" it doesn't make sense to me and I wonder how many of these relatively new relationships stand the strain of pregnancy and babies (I'm sure some do)
    Just my opinion hun. not trying to offend at all x
     
  4. vixxy86

    vixxy86 Well-Known Member

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    Yes defo, its been almost 6 months now and nothing, so i think it will be a while. I hope it will happen one day, but being on the pill for so long i think has had an effect too. Im happy with things, it just knocked my good mood slightly!! I mentioned to my OH to stop TTC and he said we've come so far to stop now. "/ we'll just keep going but not with as much effort I dont think lol xx

    Thanks for your kind reply :) xx
     
  5. vixxy86

    vixxy86 Well-Known Member

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    I do understand your opinoins and in a way they make sense to me. I dont know, this just feels right. Maybe I am in the wrong then "/ xx
     
  6. CARNAT22

    CARNAT22 Well-Known Member

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    I am inclined to agree as well.

    I am not saying it never works out - my friend feel preggers 7 months into a new relationship and they now have 2 kiddies and are going strong.

    However when you are in the early stages you are in your honeymoon period [and are both always at your very best]

    I think that to truly know someone you need to have a history and have been through ups and downs together - sadly this is something that happens over time?

    I cannot imagine having decided to TTC a few months after meeting my OH. I wanted him all to myself !!

    xxxxxxxxxx
     
  7. netty

    netty Well-Known Member

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    at the end of the day if you KNOW you can do this, support this child and stay together then :yay: go you hun, but i agree with cos, too many people rush into this so unfortunalty you tend to get tarred with thier brush when people give you their opinion on your TTC plans.

    You seem clued up tho hun and u describe your OH like he is an angel so if this is what you both want then go for it xxxx
     
  8. vixxy86

    vixxy86 Well-Known Member

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    Thank you!! I do now see my friends point though.....i thought she was being horrible but I guess she was concerned. xxx
     
  9. netty

    netty Well-Known Member

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    its just stereotyping hun and everyone does it as people are pretty generic, just proove em all wrong thats all you gotta do lol

    like me.............i used to be an addict, people think now that i cant achiev anything coz they pitch me against other addicts who throw their lifes away, relaspe etc

    whos the one with a spanking job, brand new 3 bed house, gorgeous OH and ( hopefully ) a baby soon.............ME so F them lol

    its along different lines but you get me right?
     
  10. vixxy86

    vixxy86 Well-Known Member

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    Well done you :) you should be very proud xxx

    :dust::dust: thanks ladies for all your comments, lots of baby dust to you all xx
     
  11. netty

    netty Well-Known Member

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    you know who you are and if you can do this hun. xxx people will always worry about you lol
     
  12. Lynds77

    Lynds77 Well-Known Member

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    Hun, I am 35 in a few months and have pcos. I got preggers after just 2 months of properly ttc with opks and smep. A year before that we were not trying not protecting.
     
  13. JoS

    JoS Well-Known Member

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    I do agree with what everyones saying and like people have said I'm sure you're friend meant well, was just a little tactless. But I have to say I knew straight away when I met my husband that he was right for me. I was not long out of a ten year relationship and I have always said when you've been with mr wrong you know when you find mr right!
    So everyone is right, it doesn't always work out but I'm a big believer in trusting your instincts.
    Good Luck xxx
     
  14. leesey

    leesey Well-Known Member

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    If it's any consolation, I had a friend who insisted I was rushing things when I mentioned having a baby after 3 YEARS together!! This was nearly 3 years ago mind you, but still at the time I was in total disbelief that she was putting me down for wanting to have a baby with my boyfriend of 3 years!! Evidently after having the discussion with my then boyfriend (now hubby) he said he wanted to wait until we were married, and so we did!

    Point being, it's not friends' opinions that count, it's yours and OH's decision xx
     
  15. Katkin72

    Katkin72 Well-Known Member

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    Hi Vixxy, I believe when you find "the right man" you just know you want to spend the rest of your life with them. I had a whirlwind romance - met my husband in march 2010, it was love at 1st sight, we got engaged 6 months later and married in June 2011. We talked about starting a family very early into our relationship and agreed we would start trying soon after we got married. We wanted to start trying before now but as my husband is training to be a mental health nurse and qualifies this September we agreed to wait till early in 2012 (for financial reasons). Every couple is different and I would say go with your heart on this one, if you both feel ready to start trying for a baby then the time is right for you. I'm sure your friend didn't mean to offend you with what she said, she was probably just concerned you were making the right decision and wasn't very tactful in how she put it! Good luck on your journey TTC xxx
     
  16. vixxy86

    vixxy86 Well-Known Member

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    Thank you all.......really appreciate your comments :) xxx

    baby dust to you all.......:dust::dust::dust::dust:


    xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
     
  17. fairycake

    fairycake Well-Known Member

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    I had a similar whirlwind, got together with my hubby in oct 08, engaged in march 09, married sept 10. knew after a week of being together that we were meant tobetogether, informed him of all my problems in the fertility area and were ntnp from then until our wedding which is when we decided to 'officially' ttc.
    Its kind of a family tradition whirlwind relationships, my mum and day were together 6 weeks before he proposed, for my oldest sister it was 3 months, and when my other sister finally (after several engagements and several children) came out as lesbian her and her now wife were together 2 months before becoming engaged!
    I think that as long as you feel right and know its right then what other people say shouldn't matter xxx
     

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