My 3 year old daughter screams a lot!

Discussion in 'Ask a Mum!' started by Lilalylola, Apr 22, 2016.

  1. Lilalylola

    Lilalylola Well-Known Member

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    Hi everyone!

    I am after some advise.
    My 3 year old daughter screams a lot already for months.

    When somthing does not go her way, scream!
    When her brother does not like to play with her, scream!
    When her brother likes to play with something else then her ponies, scream!
    When something does not go fast enough, scream!

    To be honest she practically screams for everything :( and I am getting desperate :(
    I've tried lots to make it stop from ignoring,to explaining, to punishing it but nothing seems to help.

    Today I am at the end of my tether and I shouted back at her the shut the hell up!
    And I feel so bad:( because I know this won't do any good at all.

    Please does someone have some advise?
     
  2. BunnyN

    BunnyN Well-Known Member

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    Try not to panic. Its partly the age and some children are more vocal and have less patience than others. Have you tried walking away and ignoring her? Not getting any reaction from screaming might be enough to make it feel not worth doing.
     
  3. Lilalylola

    Lilalylola Well-Known Member

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    I have tried everything I can think of, when i just walk away and ignore her she will just follow me screaming every where I go and can easily continue this for an hour and half!
    When I sit her on a naughty step every time she screams it has no affect at all.
    Rewarding good behaviour worked for a while but ended up less effective after a few weeks.

    I do not panic, I just get really irritated by now to be honest, i wake up with her being loud and i go to bed with her being loud.
    I tried finding out why she is being so loud but no luck yet, I think its just her..
     
  4. BunnyN

    BunnyN Well-Known Member

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    Walking away doesnt work the first time. Infact it will make it worse to start with but it should help after two or 3 times if its going to. Dd can be a bit of a screamer but she doesnt follow me she stays where she is if I walk away so thats a bit different.

    Another thing to try might be to sit down and cuddle her. Tell her that you know she wants... but she cant have it right now because... Sympathise and say you know its hard to have to wait etc. My DD sometimes gets really fustrated that she cant comunicate what she wants. Letting her know that I understand and I'm sympathetic but making it clear she cant have whatever it is now helps when she is like that.

    Look out for any pattern as to when she does it like when she is tired or hungry or after she has eaten sweets or chocolate. My sister used to react badly to food additives in sweets and it made her into a totally different child.

    None of this might help you but just trying to think what I would do or what has worked for me before. I dont blame you for being stressed. It sounds really fustrating.
     
    #4 BunnyN, Apr 23, 2016
    Last edited: Apr 23, 2016
  5. MrsS15

    MrsS15 Well-Known Member

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    My niece (4) is a screamer and also her new thing when my sister asks her to do something is to hiss at her. Yes, hiss like an angry cat!!

    The first time she done it in my house I bent down to her and told her if she screams in my house one more time I'll sit her out in the hall on the step and she can stay there for 4 minutes. She done it again and I didn't speak a word to her, just took her by the hand and sat her there, walked away and left her. She went nuts! Screamed and threw an almighty tantrum but she stayed the 4 minutes. She done it one more time after that and eventually got the message. Thankfully she never screams (or hisses) in my house now. I know you say you've tried this but give her a warning first thing in the morning that you're going to have no more screaming and every time she does it she'll be in the naughty step. Its just about perseverance, even if you have to do 50 times in one day, do it. The next day might be 25 and the next less and less again.

    My son has behavioural problems and unfortunately I've had to grow to be very strict to have a relatively easy life lol. I had other issues with my son and we done the naughty step. The first day I was told to keep a record of how many times he was on the step and it was 38 times. By day 5 he didn't spend a day on it, hard work but well worth it! We also had to do back to bed routine, again we kept a record, the first night he got up 67 times. I've learnt to be very stubborn :lol: (although on the 60th time he got out of bed, I banged my own head off the hall wall - but we won't tell him that ;) :lol: ) xx
     

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