miscarriage paranoia

Discussion in 'First Trimester' started by petchy, Jul 14, 2005.

  1. petchy

    petchy Well-Known Member

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    i was just starting to relax again after the small bleed i had a couple of weeks ago, and then a colleague walks in to our office and proceeds to tell me that a girl that used to work here miscarried last week at 4 months...

    i know these things happen, in fact one of my close friends had a late miscarriage at 5 months last year (she's now pregnant again - 33 weeks - thankfully it has all been ok for her this time!), but i wish my colleague hadn't told me now.

    maybe it's insensitive of me, but i really would have preferred not to know... what do you think? am i being really selfish??
     
  2. Sarah W Baby Belly

    Sarah W Baby Belly Well-Known Member

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    I agree with you totally.

    Why tell any pregnant woman horror stories about miscarriage when it isn't necessary.

    The DH and I have been really worried about this happening to me.

    However I thought I was nearly out of the woods until a bloke at work told me that his wife miscarried at 20 weeks.

    I mean, was that necessary? It upset me for the rest of the day and I am going to be worried about miscarriage for the whole journey now.
     
  3. petchy

    petchy Well-Known Member

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    thanks. sarah - i'm glad it's not just me! was thinking maybe i was hormonal and over reacting.

    i mean i feel sorry for the girl who lost her baby, but i would rather not have known as it unsettles me and makes me worry unneccessary - especially since i had that bleed before. (my colleague knows about my scare as well so you would have thought perhaps she would think twice before telling me??)

    arghh, rant over!
     
  4. newbump

    newbump Well-Known Member

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    I totally agree with you, it always makes me panic for a few mins when i hear about late misscarriages, i would rather not hear about them!!! not selfish as far as im concerned!

    Natalie x
     
  5. lisa31

    lisa31 Well-Known Member

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    Evening Girls

    I thought I was No.1 Miss Paranoia when it comes to miscarriage. As some of you already know I had to have emergency scan this Wednesday (due to bleeding Sunday and Monday) - they could only see the sac and confirm it was in the right place, anyway all day/night tuesday and wednesday - bleeding gone - so started to relax and decieded to go back work this morning. What do I get when I got up this morning and was about to leave for work - more blood.

    I rang the hospital as they told me to do and they proceeded to tell me I had to wait for the next scan (3 weeks) as they wont be able to tell me anything different from yesterday.

    It really is awful these first few weeks and I, like all of you, just want to be excited, and choosing stuff for the baby etc etc and you just feel like you cant until you know its ok.

    Never knew it would be this hard Thank goodness for this forum we are not alone!!

    You would think that you would be allocated a midwife straight away so you could air your concerns etc and know what to be worried about etc.
    (or am I just a moaney old cow!?!?!?)

    Sarah - lovely wedding photo - you look great - Im trying to figure out how to get mine on here - (my 2nd wedding anniversary this sept)
    Have to get DH on the case lol.

    L x
     
  6. Sarah W Baby Belly

    Sarah W Baby Belly Well-Known Member

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    Hi Lisa

    Yes I didn't realise that pregnancy was going to be so hard work emotionally.

    Every day we have something that takes its toll on the mind. One day I'm so tired that I worry I might crash on the way home, the next day I'm worried that I might be sick on the way to wotk, the next day I have the migraine from hell and I'm worried if I can take paracetaol or not, the next day I have fairly severe pains in my tummy and I wonder if it is trapped wind again or something more sinister, and then there are the worries that are just there all the time, money, weight, food, labour, stretch marks, gong back to work, will the scan be ok, etc etc etc.

    Don't get me wrong. I've mostly enjoyed this but I didn't expect to be so worried all the time. I normally don't worry about anything! :shock:

    Oh well, just another six months to go! :x
     
  7. petchy

    petchy Well-Known Member

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    it seems we take up worrying for britain when we become pregnant....

    at my scan at 9+4 (due to some bleeding) they were able to date the pregnancy and so said the routine 12 week dating scan would not be necessary and that i should phone up to cancel when the appointment came through. well the appointment came through, but i have no intentions of cancelling - if they question it i will just play stupid... "oh, but i wasn't told... i just assumed...."

    as i have almost no symptoms i get really paranoid that something is wrong, and especially since i'm supposed to fly out to norway to visit family on the 29th i really want to go to my scan on the 25th just to make sure everything is ok before i go! i feel a bit cheeky, but hey.... :wink:
     
  8. Manda

    Manda Well-Known Member

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    Hi all, this should hopefully put some of you at rest.

    Most late miscarriages are caused by incompetent cervix, this normally happens if you have had any surgery to your Cervix (ie biopsy) or if you have had late abortions.

    I've had this worry due to a cone biopsy and when they checked me out my cervix was shortening so i was monitored really closely, i have now got to 25 weeks so have relaxed a little as baby has a chance of surviving i'm still being monitored and i will advise any of you that have any worries due to cone biopsy or late abortion to ask your midwife if you can have a scan to check your cervix if they say no demand it it's your right, if i hadn't had such an understanding dr i probably wouldn't have carried this far.

    Manda x
     

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