Me and my pregnant girlfriend aren't getting along. What should I do?

[Famguy573]

Hello,

I don't know if this is the right place for advice, but here it goes.

Recently my girlfriend and I were having sex, and she ended up getting pregnant because of a rediculous situation where she was on top of me while pinning my arms to the bed. She got lost in the moment while I tried to pull out, but the position I was in, she just overpowered me and it resulted in me ejaculating inside of her. Then afterwards she apologized, and said that her actions were only sexual. I then went and bought the plan B pill. She took it but ended up becoming pregnant anyway. The moment we found out that she was pregnant I flipped out because we are both only 20 yrs old and still in college. But she for some reason was happy and thinks that it is a wonderful thing. While I on the other hand am shattered because I probably won't be able to finish school while having to support a kid. Today we have been arguing about this entire situation and have been disagreeing with everything. But the thing I am most afraid of right now is if she was to physical with me because of her poor decision. My girlfriend is about an inch taller than me and outweighs me by about 50 lbs while her body is mostly muscle from working out at the gym and doing cross fit. So she is very strong, while I am only 145 lbs and rather skinny from running track and cross country. So if she was to get physical with me over this situation, I am afraid that she could easily overpower me to get what she wants.

So, What is the best decision I should do right now? How should I deal with this situation without making problems worse?

 

[Emily0505]

Physical abuse is unacceptable regardless of your gender somif she gets physical, you call the police. Simple.

In regards to the pregnancy, you just have to suck it up and deal with it. Withdrawal isn't 100% effective anyway so there's always a risk of pregnancy. If you're sexually active you need to be prepared for the consequences, especially if you're not using any contraception.

You and your gf will just have to try and talk things through and decide what you are going to do but ultimately as it's her body she will have the end say.

I reiterate my first point though- violence is unacceptable be it make to female or female to male so keep safe and get help if you need it.

 

[redbear]

She should never become physical that is wrong no matter what sex. You are going to be upset if you bought her plan but no it failed or she didn't take it but it's part of having sex. There isn't anything you can do about it now. Does she work or is she at college because she can always be the breadwinner while you finish education?

 

[cassi]

Those pills very very very rarely don't work, we're talking pills that are over 99% successful. Did you see her take it? Call me cynical but she overpowered you in bed and let that happen, you had to buy her the pill, then seemed happy she was pregnant...also, how recently was it? Is there any chance if she did take the pill she was already pregnant and trying to cover it up? She probably wouldn't know she was pregnant until at least a month later.

She sounds like a bully....no one should ever be physical with anyone, wether she's the female or not.

 

[redbear]

Cassi I thought the same thing tbh I know it's rare but those pills do work really well. She may have done all of it planned. It all sounds a little set up.

 

[JD.Deedee]

If she's done it because it was sexually intended she could've been ovulating right at that moment and then the morning after pill doesn't work as it's supposed to prospone ovulation. I don't get why you wouldn't be able to finish college tho? Do you live together, do you not live in the U.K.? Why are you scared of her getting physical with you has anything happened in the past that makes you think that might happen other than the pinning down during sex?

The best thing you can do is just let her know your concerns but anything other than that it's up to you whether you want to stay with this woman or not. You can't force her into anything but you can make decisions for yourself.

 

[redbear]

I don't know about the pull in America but the one in the UK works no matter what time of the month as long as it's taken within a certain time.

 

[Famguy573]

We do both live together. She is very sensitive and can get very emotional. It's just that she is bigger and a lot stronger than me, so I feel like the next decision that I make whether it is to leave her, she would definitely Te upset. I just feel like leaving her in this situation wouldn't be the courageous thing to do.

 

[JD.Deedee]

If you want out, you want out don't stay because you have to.. support her and your child if that's what you want but you don't have to stay in a relationship where you're not happy. Whether that's courageous or not. We live in 2017 not 1917

 

[cassi]

Don't stay because you are happy or because she has tried to trap you (I'm sorry but that's what it seems like reading your initial post).

Do what is best for you, you can't spend your life with someone you're not happy with and worse scared of.

 

[bellecat]

If you're unhappy then leave, easier said than done I know.. but ultimately if you stay with her, you will end up building up so much resentment towards her and it'll only make things worse.
I hope everything works out ok.

 

[redbear]

There is nothing worse than a child raised in a unhappy home. Two parents can do parent and do it well. Being separate doesn't change the love for your child as long as your willing to put the effort in xx

 

[prayforme]

My advice for you is to have an open mind. I know you are trying your best to understand your girl and find a solution for your situation, but you need to remember that the baby is the most important. Maybe that little one is made by accident, but you need to take the full responsibility even if you are not ready. You also need to be patient with your girl because she's pregnant.