Low

[Skidoo]

I've been sending positive upbeat replies to messages from ladies in the early days saying 'it will get better', but the truth of it is that right now I'm feeling really miserable.

It's a combiniation of things really. Not sleeping well and worrying about getting into the evil sleepless cycle that haunted the first several months of my pregnancy. Feeling worried that we will be stuck in our current tiny 2 bed with OH's 13 yo son when the baby arrives. Feeling mad at my Dad who pampers and cossets my younger sisters when I was working and paying my own rent at their age and I'm still struggling (one of them is doing an 6 month internship in Paris and getting £800 a month allowance while I have to borrow £5k from him so that we can have somewhere decent to live). Feeling like my friends aren't really there for me as I'm not the all singing all drinking girl I used to be. Stressing about not having bought any presents and having no time do so before xmas. Stressing about having a ton of stuff to do at work before Mat Leave starts and not actually doing much about it. Fretting that even though all the tests and scans have been fine, there will be something terribly wrong with my little darling. Wondering why my OH can't understand when I tell him I'm upset about something. Feeling like I have to do everything for myself and can't expect OH to do stuff or encourage me or remember anything.

I just want to sleep and/or cry only I can't at work and we have both of OHs kids this weekend so I can hardly have a good cry there as the walls are so thin you can hear heavy breathing from the next room! Oh, and I'm going to see my nearly 100 yo gran with one of my sisters tomorrow and could really do without the strain of that.

Okay. Rant over. For now. I'm having a bad day.

 

[Layla]

hugs ((((((((((((((((((Skidoo)))))))))))))))))))) xx

theres not really anything i can say that will make you feel better, im sorry you feel so low tho, hope it passes soon.
maybe make time for yourself tonight, have a hot bath and try to relax a bit if you can.
sorry, i dont really know what else to say

xxx

 

[hels]

i know just how you feel babe!!!
most of the points you have mentioned im feeling too! worried about the 2 bed house situ, we have got OH 6 year old ALL christmas from 21-28 dec, feel bad cos im so tired and only finished work today and wanted time to myself. Sleep is driving me mad...hope tonight is better. im worried about money and how are we gonna buy all that we need??
sometimes its so hard to keep smiling, just wanted to say that your not alone. big hugs, and keep your chin up.
xxxxx

 

[Rosieroo]

{{{{{{{{{{{hugs Skidoo}}}}}}}}}}}}

 

[lisa31]

Hi Skidoo

If its any consoloation I know exactly what you mean. I'm having a bad day too. All i can think of is how much I am missing out with stuff e.g. smoking, Works christmas 'do' today which is normally the best night out of the year -starting at 1.00pm - but there was me at 3.30pm having to go home after my meal while they all went out on the lash - did I feel sorry for myself or what driving back from the restaurant this afternoon (all that free booze too .

Got home and sat here on my own all night as D/H is at his party - bah humbug. Also got a few more social gatherings to go to and really dont want to go to anymore - fed up of being the only sober one and listening to: "It'll be worth it"

ARGHGHGHGHGHGHG I know it will be worth it, but surely we are allowed days where we miss our old life?! - and we dont need people telling us!!!!!!?????

I am such a moaner these last few days!!!!!

Hope you feel better soon

L x

 

[Tineke]

Awwwwwww... HUGS to you form Australia, you are in my thoughts and hoping you don't let yourself get too down about it all.

Sometimes we forget how easy it can be to make the smallest of changes in their lives, just to add that excitement and make things seem worthwhile. I think things have come to a head to you, yes you are feeling hormonal, but screw that right now because you are feeling NORMAL and generally pi$&ed off, and I don't blame you really. For one it is bloody expensive to live in the UK, I know it because I lived there for 4 years for my University - there's nothing worse than wondering how things can get better, but there are always options. I am not sure what you are doing for a living but I have always said and lived by the fact that if you are not happy, it is never dificult to make some changes to your life. I was a teacher at a school, that I just couldn't stand, the children were FANTASTIC, but the administration part of it was sneaky and rubbish, so I qiut, not thinking for a second what I would do, before i knew it I was the first of 27 teachers (JUST IN THAT YEAR) to quit.

Since then things have just gotton better, I made the decision that I won't take crap from anyone EVER and it's amazing how I have applied this to my everyday life, without turning into a total bitch LOL - I mean it LOL

I also have found out that many friends that I had before I was pregnant have disappeared form my life.. I lived on a small island on and off for 10 years and I don't even know those people anymore, i fell out of the going out scene, although I did not change as a person - and, unless you are pregnant yourself, people just do not understand that we still need our friends around us. It doesn't help that I have moved to another counrty in the past 3 months, and now I am contemplating moving to States as the work will be better for my partner. We were going to apply for his residency here in Australia (I am Aussie) but it will take YEARS, and we can't really sit back living off of my svaings waiting for it to process, so we are thinking about leaving for the States again, after June sometime (as we are getting married in June, we can't really eave before then) SO........ we will most likely return to Oz in a few years when we have more money saved.

I am sorry you are feeling like this, although these are all things that can be worked through and resolved, just keep that in mind!!! It may be a small place for now, but in your 3 year plan, things might be different, write down your expectations of both you and your OH and see what comes up, regardless of it all, just remember that 'the world is your oyster' and it is up to you to make any changes in life that you want... There are no boundaries to what you are able to be and aquire.... It's true!!

Ok I have written a story here... thinking of you and all others in these situations.

Tineke oxoxoxox

 

[*saulino*]

Hello

Im so sorry you feel so horrible, but i know it happens to the best of us.
Ive been feeling crappy as well and like everyone else said the christmas season doesnt help, cuz theres somany partys and get togethers and we get to sit there bored and sober........ what i would do for some whisky right now lol.

My friends have also not really been there but at least you will know who your true friends are in the end and you can do the same ot the others when they are preg. Always remember what goes around comes around.

We as well have been worrying over expenses as my OH is the only one working and i dont get any money cuz i havent worked in over a year.
Plus the lack of hours OH has been getting due to christmas holidays.
Just hoping our daughter doesnt arrive till January.

All you can do is hope for the best and as long as you have eachother to lean on everything will be fine., When the baby arrives, you will be so happy you will forget about most of these problems.

Well i hope you at least get some time to yourselves to get yourself together and try and relax.
Best of luck
Katrina xxx

 

[lisa31]

Thanks Saulino

I feel a bit better today and am off in town in a minute to do some christmas shopping - I did sound like a whingy so and so - but its true - I am fed of going out and being the designated driver and people leaning over drunk saying "whats up with you" blah blah blah lol - making myself laugh now!

I also got other things on my mind about my job which I hate (well not the job - the idiots I have to work for - and how I cant leave because we need the money. I also have a company car which means I dont pay any petrol / insurance etc so its not just so easy for me to pack it all up as I dont have the qualifications to go to another job as easy as that - I sort of worked myself up in this one.

So theres that then theres the money worries - I worry we wont be able to afford our ridiculous mortgage when Im on maternity leave.

Think I'm just worried about eveything at the moment and cant do a lot to change anything right now - cant really hand my notice in at work right now - as I only have 6 weeks to go before maternity leave so I guesss I just got to sit tight.

Hope you all feeling better today

L x

 

I hope you're feeling a bit better today Skidoo,

Sending you big hugs,

xxxxxxxx