I keep trying to post here in the loss forum over the last couple of days but dont seem to come up with the right thing to say. I'd like to post my story because I have found it a comfort and help to read the stories of other ladies and I think talking about it will help the healing. Maybe I'll just wait a few days and start my own thread when the time feels right. It struck me though that there has been so much bad news in the June Mummies thread recently that it might be nice to have a place to meet up and chat.
June mummies loss thread
- Thread starter BunnyN
- Start date
Redhead
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Oct 12, 2015
- Messages
- 143
- Reaction score
- 0
Hi
I've wanted to post a thread too but haven't really known what to say that hasn't been said already. I've got a scan tomorrow morning to make sure it's complete, I'm hoping it is but for some reason I feel like it might not be.
I hope everyone is coping OK
Xxx
I've wanted to post a thread too but haven't really known what to say that hasn't been said already. I've got a scan tomorrow morning to make sure it's complete, I'm hoping it is but for some reason I feel like it might not be.
I hope everyone is coping OK
Xxx
So sorry to hear about all your losses. How is everyone doing?
I was one of the first June losses, gosh it feels like forever ago that I was so happy and pregnant. If it helps at all it really does feel like time has flown past for me. I think I may have ovd last week so we are already trying again. Hoping so much it doesn't take as long again until our next bfp.
I was one of the first June losses, gosh it feels like forever ago that I was so happy and pregnant. If it helps at all it really does feel like time has flown past for me. I think I may have ovd last week so we are already trying again. Hoping so much it doesn't take as long again until our next bfp.
Eryinera
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Dec 19, 2013
- Messages
- 7,618
- Reaction score
- 0
I'm phoning up to book my "completion" scan tomorrow. When I get my scan I'm also going yo ask about my pathways for the next time. I'm hoping to push for clexane which I'm surprised at as I'm terrified of injections but we shall see.
I'm planning on trying soon. And the everyone I've spoken to actually seem to be thinking they will actually find a cause for my rcmc. After the 2nd I just kept being told "oo even if you have many mcs only a few do we find reasons for" but after my 3rd they found it "odd" that they all had hbs and all ended at the same time. I'm still doubtful. I've has that many tests and I've always had "normal" results.
I too don't quite feel like I have completed yet but Tmi I have passed several large clots that have been larger than my previous mcs "clots" I've passed one that could have been it but also two almost identical smaller ones about £2 ball shape it was really odd never had that before. I don't know you would think I'd be a pro at this by now lol!!
I'm planning on trying soon. And the everyone I've spoken to actually seem to be thinking they will actually find a cause for my rcmc. After the 2nd I just kept being told "oo even if you have many mcs only a few do we find reasons for" but after my 3rd they found it "odd" that they all had hbs and all ended at the same time. I'm still doubtful. I've has that many tests and I've always had "normal" results.
I too don't quite feel like I have completed yet but Tmi I have passed several large clots that have been larger than my previous mcs "clots" I've passed one that could have been it but also two almost identical smaller ones about £2 ball shape it was really odd never had that before. I don't know you would think I'd be a pro at this by now lol!!
Redhead
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Oct 12, 2015
- Messages
- 143
- Reaction score
- 0
Eryinera
I really admire you , all the posts I have seen from you have been so supportive of people, and you have been through so much. I do hope you have plenty of people supporting you.
Snowbee
I'm glad time has flown by and you are doing OK, fingers crossed for a BFP soon for you xxx
Tmi - I have had terrible terrible contraction like pain for two days and passed one largish clot, that's why I feel like it can't be done, but equally the pains have near enough gone so I don't know, I'll find out tomorrow I guess.
I really admire you , all the posts I have seen from you have been so supportive of people, and you have been through so much. I do hope you have plenty of people supporting you.
Snowbee
I'm glad time has flown by and you are doing OK, fingers crossed for a BFP soon for you xxx
Tmi - I have had terrible terrible contraction like pain for two days and passed one largish clot, that's why I feel like it can't be done, but equally the pains have near enough gone so I don't know, I'll find out tomorrow I guess.
Eryinera
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Dec 19, 2013
- Messages
- 7,618
- Reaction score
- 0
I had that redhead - contractions, a clot, then it stopped. the next night I had more contractions and a really large clot and the pains been like period pains since only seem to get pains at night though. My son was born through the night too wonder if there is a link!
Support wise I have my oh and you guys really. told mum n mun in law I want no fuss. I have a few work friends too but again I don't do fuss. I hate fuss lol.
Good luck at your scan tomorrow hope you get good news x
Support wise I have my oh and you guys really. told mum n mun in law I want no fuss. I have a few work friends too but again I don't do fuss. I hate fuss lol.
Good luck at your scan tomorrow hope you get good news x
Last edited:
I wish there were not so many of us June mums to join this thread but its nice to know you are not alone.
I'm getting cramps and bleeding and a few clots, but they are just blood, no tissue yet. The bleeding still isnt super heavy so I think it is going to get heavier before anything more happens. OH and I have decided we want to save the remains to bury.
I'm getting cramps and bleeding and a few clots, but they are just blood, no tissue yet. The bleeding still isnt super heavy so I think it is going to get heavier before anything more happens. OH and I have decided we want to save the remains to bury.
Eryinera
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Dec 19, 2013
- Messages
- 7,618
- Reaction score
- 0
That's nice bunny. Not to be too crude but make sure you pee into a container if you aren't already. It may be too late for a lot of us but maternity pads are uncomfortable bit offer good protection for this time. Due to my health I've not got any this time round and we'll I've made a bit if a mess x x
I read to pee through a sieve, so thought I might do that, lol. I'm kind of counting on getting a bit of warning with heavier bleeding and stronger cramps but maybe I should start already incase I get taken by surprise. I passed some big blood clots and a piece of retained placenta after my births so I'm thinking this is going to feel simmilar.
Almost everthing I know about MC is from reading other womens stories online. No one writes a guide book to get you through MC and no one in real life seems to want to talk about the details. I'm the kind of person who wants to know details about what to expect TMI and all. What did women do before the internet?
Almost everthing I know about MC is from reading other womens stories online. No one writes a guide book to get you through MC and no one in real life seems to want to talk about the details. I'm the kind of person who wants to know details about what to expect TMI and all. What did women do before the internet?
Last edited:
Redhead
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Oct 12, 2015
- Messages
- 143
- Reaction score
- 0
Bunny. I've been exactly the same I've read so much but there really isn't a guide, I think everyones experience is totally different, pain, how much clotting, bleeding, it's all totally different from woman to woman. I did feel like the nhs didn't prepare me at all though.
After my early loss I mentioned it to doctors a couple of times and basically got met with awkward silence. To be honest I havent even bothered going to the doctor this time. We were doing our care with an independent MW because I wasnt impressed with the care I got from my other pregnancies and we had our births with her anyway so it seemed to make sense to do it all with her this time. I gave her a ring yesterday evening and asked some questions and she was quite helpful and I know I can get in touch with her again if I'm worried. I'm not planning to go to the doctors unless there is a problem. I've known too many others who have had bad experiences with doctors and hospitals so cant really see the point in spending hrs in a waiting room just to get poked and prodded and find out what we know already. I'd rather do it naturally anyway. Of course if there is some complication that is different.
Last edited:
Eryinera
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Dec 19, 2013
- Messages
- 7,618
- Reaction score
- 0
Every woman is diff and every mc is different.
Below is tmi so if people don't want to read fine for those who want to know here's my tmi stories:
To be honest I've had a good experience in the two hospitals I've has my mcs with this time I've pretty much done it alone. But my hospitals are both highly rated. The doctors I've dealt with have been aas holes with no bedside manner but it's mainly been nurse led when I was in hospital.
// @10:50 Edited a bit in tmi to clarify and stuff.
Below is tmi so if people don't want to read fine for those who want to know here's my tmi stories:
In the 1st and 3rd mc I got a "feeling" like I was going to pass something I got quite heavy down below and and the urge to basically pee. It kinda felt like i had a bubble waiting if you get me. With my 2nd mc I didn't get any warming at all and I didn't pass many. Erm... intact clots as it were. The 1st and 3rd I had quite neat large ball shaped clots. They are quite large. It started with smaller tissue looking clots. This mc the heavy bleeding started quite quickly once it started the first two it was more a gradual build up
In the first one I had a time I thought it was over then I stood up (after bubs had gone confirmed on scan) and I basically flooded myself with blood and needed a shower I almost called a&e but after leaving the shower I noticed the bleeding had pretty much stopped and it didn't pick up again.
The second was very much like a constant heavy clotty period snd I was actually shocked when they told me it was completely gone. I didn't think I had passed enough of anything really.
On my early 4 1/2 week "chemical" one day I woke up and there was a gush of blood and again shower that was over pretty darn quick.
My 2nd mc I didn't get much pains or cramping at all
.with my first I got an urge to be alone for min and basically got on my knees by my bed and felt my body push.
This time as I have previously said I had two large almost identical clots then a third really large one a day later (so I would keep on with the sieve/container for a while and don't forget to also hold it in front of you need a no2 if you get me...) I do have a seeky feeling this time though I had an empty sac twin that never developed but that's based purely on something I saw when they last scanned me confirming lack of hb she then looked around and kept going back to this empty sac looking bit before going on to check my ovaries. She didn't say anything but I watched the whole thing on a large tv screen in front of me. Though I know you can pass quite large clots even in a singleton pregnancy as well as bubs.
In the first one I had a time I thought it was over then I stood up (after bubs had gone confirmed on scan) and I basically flooded myself with blood and needed a shower I almost called a&e but after leaving the shower I noticed the bleeding had pretty much stopped and it didn't pick up again.
The second was very much like a constant heavy clotty period snd I was actually shocked when they told me it was completely gone. I didn't think I had passed enough of anything really.
On my early 4 1/2 week "chemical" one day I woke up and there was a gush of blood and again shower that was over pretty darn quick.
My 2nd mc I didn't get much pains or cramping at all
.with my first I got an urge to be alone for min and basically got on my knees by my bed and felt my body push.
This time as I have previously said I had two large almost identical clots then a third really large one a day later (so I would keep on with the sieve/container for a while and don't forget to also hold it in front of you need a no2 if you get me...) I do have a seeky feeling this time though I had an empty sac twin that never developed but that's based purely on something I saw when they last scanned me confirming lack of hb she then looked around and kept going back to this empty sac looking bit before going on to check my ovaries. She didn't say anything but I watched the whole thing on a large tv screen in front of me. Though I know you can pass quite large clots even in a singleton pregnancy as well as bubs.
To be honest I've had a good experience in the two hospitals I've has my mcs with this time I've pretty much done it alone. But my hospitals are both highly rated. The doctors I've dealt with have been aas holes with no bedside manner but it's mainly been nurse led when I was in hospital.
// @10:50 Edited a bit in tmi to clarify and stuff.
Last edited:
Lilmisshopeful
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- May 21, 2013
- Messages
- 5,793
- Reaction score
- 0
So.sorry your all here girls it's a rubbish place to be. Bunny deffo use a pot or a sieve every time if you want the remains. You need to check everything as our bodies are clever and will cover the baby in blood and will clot to make it easier to pass so you can easily miss it and would be a shame as you want to bury them. It's not nice to do but needs must if it's what you want. But it could also be obvious if the sac hasn't broken. Massive hugs xxx
Last edited:
Eryinera
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Dec 19, 2013
- Messages
- 7,618
- Reaction score
- 0
Thanks lilmiss. And thanks for the help a few days ago when I was freaking out x it's not as bad as I feared it would be it actually feels very familiar. That's dome comfort I guess. I've done this bit before! I hate the confirmation scan though always makes me cry!
Lilmisshopeful
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- May 21, 2013
- Messages
- 5,793
- Reaction score
- 0
Any time hun x
I hate the scans too it's that first few moments when your waiting for them to turn the screen then when they don't you realise it's all over I hate it. Even when it's good news those first moments suck. With my loss in April i had so many scans incase it was a late starter like oliver that when they finally decided it wasn't going anywhere I already knew but at my scan to check it was all gone I made her show me I needed to see myself. Weirdly it actually helped me accept it. Xxx
I hate the scans too it's that first few moments when your waiting for them to turn the screen then when they don't you realise it's all over I hate it. Even when it's good news those first moments suck. With my loss in April i had so many scans incase it was a late starter like oliver that when they finally decided it wasn't going anywhere I already knew but at my scan to check it was all gone I made her show me I needed to see myself. Weirdly it actually helped me accept it. Xxx
I think my sac might have broken lastnight. I went to bed and I think I must have fallen asleap. After a while I got up to change my pad because I thought it was soaked with blood but there was no blood it was only wet.
Lilmisshopeful
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- May 21, 2013
- Messages
- 5,793
- Reaction score
- 0
If you really want it then hun I'd use the sieve or a pot as it's very tiny and easy to miss and might just look like a clot at first. Hope it's over soon so you can bury your little one and start the healing process xxx
I know what you mean about those awful first moments. On Friday afternoon it was like one long awful first moment. She couldnt see it on the external scan and told me to go empty my bladder to do an internal one. By that point I was 99% sure there was no hope. I wanted to see even if there was no heartbeat but she basically wouldnt show me the screen. I asked her to print pictures for us at the end and she said something a bit grumpy about we could get a second oppinion if we wanted. My husband said we just wanted a picture because it was the only one we would ever get. She seemed to think that was strange and kind of mumbled about it under her breath but printed it for us. I can understand why others wouldnt want to see but surely I cant be the first person who wanted to see my baby even if there was no heartbeat? The weird thing is that she wouldnt even confirm the baby wasnt okay. She told me to rest and not worry and come back on Monday to see again. We had to push her to even tell us that she hadnt found a heartbeat. I mean baby stopped growing at 8+6 so at that size it should be pretty obvious? I'm not sure if she really thought there was hope or she thought she was letting us down gently. Maybe she was hoping she wouldnt be the one to tell us incase I started sobbing or something. Anyway, sorry, rant over.
We phoned the sonographer we did our scans with the last two pregnancies and he squeezed us in for a last minute appointment that evening. We only hadnt gone to him first because its a 40min drive. I was already sure there was no hope but kind of felt like I wanted a 'propper' scan. There I got to see the whole thing on a big screan. He was very up front about there being no heartbeat and that there was no hope at this stage it would be easy to see if there was one. He answered our questions and had a really good look at the placenta because we had problems with the placenta when I was pregnant with DD. He also had a good look at the baby and said everything was were it was supposed to be so his best guess was that it was a heart defect. When we said we wanted ppictures and the DVD from the scan I think he thought it a little odd but went out of his way to take a lovely 3d pictue. Our little baby looks so perfect.
We phoned the sonographer we did our scans with the last two pregnancies and he squeezed us in for a last minute appointment that evening. We only hadnt gone to him first because its a 40min drive. I was already sure there was no hope but kind of felt like I wanted a 'propper' scan. There I got to see the whole thing on a big screan. He was very up front about there being no heartbeat and that there was no hope at this stage it would be easy to see if there was one. He answered our questions and had a really good look at the placenta because we had problems with the placenta when I was pregnant with DD. He also had a good look at the baby and said everything was were it was supposed to be so his best guess was that it was a heart defect. When we said we wanted ppictures and the DVD from the scan I think he thought it a little odd but went out of his way to take a lovely 3d pictue. Our little baby looks so perfect.
Last edited:
Lilmisshopeful
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- May 21, 2013
- Messages
- 5,793
- Reaction score
- 0
Oh hun I'm so sorry you had a rubbish scan. Some people shouldn't be scanning in the epu. Our epu does a rescan before confirming bad news so maybe that's what it was but she should have explained everything and the reasons for it. I'm glad you got the scan you wanted even tho was bad news.
I asked for pictures before with one of my losses but she couldn't get a good view as to much blood but she was happy to do me one and didn't make me feel bad at all.
I know their job must suck at times but that shouldn't be a reason to treat you that way xxx
I asked for pictures before with one of my losses but she couldn't get a good view as to much blood but she was happy to do me one and didn't make me feel bad at all.
I know their job must suck at times but that shouldn't be a reason to treat you that way xxx
Last edited:
