Joining you ladies

Discussion in 'Long Term TTC & Fertility Issues' started by Browneyed Girl, Jun 1, 2013.

  1. Browneyed Girl

    Browneyed Girl Well-Known Member

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    Hi ladies, I don't feel like I belong in ttc any more so I'd like to join you ladies if that's ok.

    A bit of background, I've been ttc since Oct 2011. At first I was just ntnp and got a bfp in Jan 2012, sadly I had a mmc confirmed in Feb and eventually an erpc in March. I have been trying again since May 2012 but not even a hint of a bfp. Over the last 12 months I have really struggled with this to the point where I've felt like I'm going to have a breakdown. Ttc and grief is a tough mixture.

    To add to the mix I also turned 35 this year so worry about age on top of everything else!!

    I had tests done in Jan, they all came back fine and my cycles are regular (except a wonky 25 day one I've just had, hope that's a one off!). My oh had a SA done a couple of months ago and his GP told him the results were fine and nothing to worry about - from what I've seen on the Internet though this could not be further from the truth! The count was 21million but 95% abnormal and only 35% motile (with only 3% of these having rapid motility). This seems bad to me?

    We have our first appointment at the fertility clinic next Thursday, I'm not sure what to expect.

    Look forward to speaking to you all xxx


     
  2. Alwaystrying

    Alwaystrying Well-Known Member

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    Welcome, of course you can join us here, loads of really good advise and there has been so many success stories in this section recently, makes you realise you should never give up :)

    I don't know too much about SA to be honest, but if you have an appointment soon they wil be able to go through all this with you

    Xx
     
  3. Browneyed Girl

    Browneyed Girl Well-Known Member

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    Thanks for the welcome Alwaystrying :)

    It is really good to see people who have been trying a long time finally get their bfp so fingers crossed for all us ladies xx




     
  4. Misspooh123

    Misspooh123 Member

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    Hello,

    Welcome! Best of luck at your clinic appointment next week. There is always support on here despite your situation. It's helpful just to get stuff off your chest sometimes.
    We have had 2 SAs through GP referral and waiting on a third from our clinic, but we are male factor fertility issues where there was 0 sperm, so I cannot really comment on your specific levels, however your clinic will be most likely take further SA samples to confirm any results.
    There are WHO guidelines on which any SA results are based so the clinic will use these to further analyse your OH's sperm and make any recommendations.
    They will most likely do basic blood work for hormone levels. Or you have had this done at your GP already?
    Best of luck with the appointment.

    Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk HD
     
  5. sunnyland27

    sunnyland27 Well-Known Member

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    Hi browneyedgirl,
    I'm so sorry you're going through all of this. Ttc is soooo hard- it must be so hard to be grieving too :( I know you will worry but I think maybe you should get a second SA done. They can vary a lot from one month to the next and the fact you got a bfp after 3 months the first time is very promising (no need to worry about your age). Although it seems like you've been waiting forever for your BFP, remember it often takes more than a year (a year on average) for a healthy couple. You have had a bit of a longer journey but you will be an even better mum because of it. I'm sure you'll get your natural BFP soon, but in the meantime focus on getting yourself healthy and happy again (My doc just referred me for counselling. Maybe you could ask yours about this if you'd be interested?).

    Really hoping for some good luck for u v soon. The ltttc ladies have kept me sane, just! x
     
  6. YvonneM

    YvonneM Well-Known Member

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    Hiya welcome chick, I too didn't feel the ttc forum was for me anymore so came on here and everybody is lovely!! I have only been trying for 9 - 10 months but recently found out hubby has been diagnosed with v low sperm count with very low motility so we kinda kno that ICSI is way forward for us. I also agree that another SA would be beneficial as it can change especially if you get ur OH on vits such as wellman, selenium and zinc xxx
     
  7. Browneyed Girl

    Browneyed Girl Well-Known Member

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    Thanks hun :) I've had some blood tests done at the doctors already - ovarian reserve, thyroid and progesterone, they just said the results were good but no explanation/interpretation although I do know the progesterone was 40 which is good. I've got printouts to take to the hospital so it will be good to hear a professional opinion and of course of the SA as well. I've read that you can have a dodgy sperm sample so one on its own isn't enough to confirm a problem, I've upgraded my oh's vitamins to wellman conception so I'm hoping that will help!

    Sorry to hear about your oh's results. Is it possible that there's a blockage or something, have they done any tests to check? Have they said what your options are?

    I hope that once you've had the third set if results they can offer some options. Good luck to you too xx


     
  8. Ann30

    Ann30 Well-Known Member

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    Hiya, yeah everyone here is lovely and it really does help just knowing you are not on your own. Everything sounds promising there is nothing "wrong" with you by all accounts and you did manage to get pregnant once so I'm sure u will again. Talking to others on here has made me realise there is no rhyme or reason for it taking some people a long time and others not so long.
    I'm in a similar boat to u, although never actually got pregnant. Been trying since August 2011 , had all the tests me and hubby and everything fine apparently. We r currently giving clomid a try as fertility clinic said it may help give me a boost so here's hoping. I'm on the second month now was really gutted last month when I came on :(
    As long as we all remember we r all in the same boat and try to be positive them hopefully it will make the whole ttc thing a bit easier cos we all know how absolutely devastating it can be xxxx
     
  9. Browneyed Girl

    Browneyed Girl Well-Known Member

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    Thanks sunnyland27. I think the clinic will repeat the SA and I've started my oh on wellman conception as I've read quite a few people saying it has really improved their oh's results. I think I will just be happy to have some professional input rather than driving myself insane reading all the conflicting info on the Internet - google is not always a good thing!!

    I think you're completely right, I do need to focus on getting myself mentally healthy and happy. It's been a long time since I've just been myself and not obsessing about ttc. It has crossed my mind about some sort of counselling as I suffered from depression when I was younger and I feel so fragile now mentally that its almost as bad. I will give it a couple more months and if its no better i will definitely look into it. I think I need to get out of thinking negatively about ttc and worrying about whether its going to happen. I could spend the next 10 years in a state of misery and worry and still never have a baby - there has to be a better option. I think I'm scared to truly admit its what I want and focus on it because I don't want to set myself up for disappointment but just having negative thoughts about it or trying not to think about it doesn't make it any easier when af arrives, it's probably worse because I've been trying to suppress the feelings and the floodgates open. I've started reading a book which is designed to make you hold positive thoughts and beliefs about your fertility that in turn will improve your fertility so I'm giving it a go - if the only outcome is that I feel more positive that can only be a good thing.

    Thanks for your reply, it means a lot :) xx


     
  10. Browneyed Girl

    Browneyed Girl Well-Known Member

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    Hi, sorry to hear your oh has low sperm count and low motility. I think mine has low motility although that is just my interpretation!! Have you been referred for ICSI and is it available on the NHS?

    I think they will do another SA and I have got my oh on the wellman conception in the meantime to try and give them a boost! Has your oh been advised to take selenium and zinc as well as wellman? xxx


     
  11. Browneyed Girl

    Browneyed Girl Well-Known Member

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    Hi hun, thanks for your kind reply :) Logic tells me that things are ok but I've always been a worrier and I have really excelled myself with the amount of worrying I can do about whether ill ever conceive!! I am hopeful that there is nothing wrong as such, I wonder if I've got so negative that its actually affecting my fertility? Who knows, like you say there doesn't seem to be any rhyme or reason to conceiving!! I'm going to work on getting a more positive healthier attitude, I can't feel more disappointed or worse than I do now each month.

    I've read so many cases of clomid working - have faith in it and believe it will work for you. A book i have been reading on positive thinking talks about the placebo effect ie if you think something will work then it often will whether the actual drug does anything or not. I hope this hasnt offended you and really hope it works for you very soon xxx


     
  12. sunnyland27

    sunnyland27 Well-Known Member

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    Glad youre going to focus on the positive. The books sound like a good idea too :) I had a hard childhood but used to cope fine, then when I was about 19 it finally got me and I got depression for 2 years. Now with the threat of never having children, stress of being a carer instead of having a good career, and my dad being seriously ill I just feel like I need to sort everything out forever. My doc was actually really good! Hoping counselling will be the answer and help me deal with things better. Hope we all get our bfps through a positive mental attitude (and lots of sexy time and supplements) soon x
     
  13. YvonneM

    YvonneM Well-Known Member

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    Hiya I just did some research online nd prob went a bit OTT with bits lol!! Doc did def recommend zinc tho!! We have our first appt with fertility clone at end of June so hoping we will get more answers about the possibility of ICSI I think in my area u get 3 rounds free on NHS lol xxx
     
  14. Browneyed Girl

    Browneyed Girl Well-Known Member

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    [/QUOTE]

    Hiya I just did some research online nd prob went a bit OTT with bits lol!! Doc did def recommend zinc tho!! We have our first appt with fertility clone at end of June so hoping we will get more answers about the possibility of ICSI I think in my area u get 3 rounds free on NHS lol xxx[/QUOTE]

    Haha thanks for looking! I've read about zinc before but I'm not sure my oh trusts me to prescribe all these pills for him so I think we'll wait to see what the clinic suggest lol!

    That's good if you get 3 rounds on the NHS. Until recently my NHS trust didn't do IVF or IUI at all but I think now you can get one round of IVF.

    Good luck for your appointment xxx


     
  15. Browneyed Girl

    Browneyed Girl Well-Known Member

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    Thanks, I am feeling a little better and I hope it continues - I need to get some happiness back in my life regardless of whether I have children or not.

    Sounds like you have had a very hard time and I'm really sorry your dad is very ill. I don't know your circumstances or what your ttc issues are but try not to overload yourself, you can only do so much and I'm sure your dad would want you well and happy above all else.

    I hope the counselling helps, I have heard that sometimes it is a case of finding the right counsellor, someone you click with. Don't be afraid to ask for someone else if you don't feel it's working xxx


     

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