Is ur oh prepared for the birth?

Discussion in 'Third Trimester' started by Mrsmac1507, Jul 2, 2013.

  1. Mrsmac1507

    Mrsmac1507 Well-Known Member

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    I was having a conversation with oh about going over my due date (I'm only 36+2 the now) and I mentioned possibility of having a sweep. Oh asked what that was, I went mental telling him he should knows these things. Then we had an argument, albeit one sided, about how he's made no effort to read any of the materials iv asked him to, how he knows nothing about what could happen during birth and how I won't be in s position to coach him through it whilst in agony. He just keeps saying it'll be fine and if he doesn't know something he' ll ask the midwife. Am I being a bits nuts? How's everyone else's oh preparing?
     
  2. glowing

    glowing Well-Known Member

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    My oh wouldn't know that either I sat and worked out the birth plan with him was discussing the vit K injection for the baby and he was clueless. I still wanted his opinion etc.
     
  3. CARNAT22

    CARNAT22 Well-Known Member

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    I am pretty sure if my OH knew what labour was like he'd have been a wreck!

    I told him the in's and out's of course and explained that it could be gory, long and gruesome (it was all 3 and more!!)

    BUT I am not sure how much he listened to me.

    I think in some ways it is harder for them as we're the ones doing what we need to do and they have to watch, they can't help or intervene or take over in anyway... Also we get the Oxytocin rush (love hormone) after giving birth and they are usually left in a bit if a daze!

    OH openly praises me for getting through it though and despite him seeing things he didn't want to [he didn't want to be at the business end but I was in stirrups when I delivered and he saw everything] he is proud of me!

    Personally I was happy OH was blissfully ignorant as that kept me calm.

    xxxxxxxxxx
     
    #3 CARNAT22, Jul 2, 2013
    Last edited: Jul 2, 2013
  4. k8_005

    k8_005 Well-Known Member

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    Tom's pretty clued up on most stuff thanks to nct (bar one session he missed) but I filled him in. I think he will be ok if we hadn't done them he would prob be the same. He still asks me questions on things I mention but I don't mind it's more important he knows how to support me and doesn't fret about things happening because he has some idea of what is normal or not. Try not to be too hard on him my oh wouldn't read much books wise he does have one but he got bored of reading it lol. X
     
  5. xDenisex

    xDenisex Well-Known Member

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    I just asked oh if he knew what a sweep was an he was like a what? That will be a no then xx
     
  6. Mrsmac1507

    Mrsmac1507 Well-Known Member

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    We didn't get to go to antenatal classes as they ran on my the nights I work late. I know some of it is to do with my anxieties as a first time mum, but he is just so laid back about it all.
     
  7. Nat28

    Nat28 Well-Known Member

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    No is he eck!! He things i have all the answers and no what to do, think he thinks ill just get on with it and he will just sit there on his phone!!!haha i think hell just deal with it when it happens no point stressing about it! Weve got antenatal classes in august hopefully thatl prepare him abit!x
     
  8. giz

    giz Well-Known Member

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    My hubby learnt his lesson the hard way from last time...labour can be long and boring.

    I told him to pack himself drinks and snacks...did he? No. And would I let him leave the room?! No!!! He was quite hungry, although bless the midwives, they made him toast after the baby came!

    He'll be bringing a pillow/cushion to sit on this time. He got a rather sore bum sitting on a tiny hard stool (I had a water birth) last time.

    He's pretty much the same with regards to stuff like sweeps.
    ----------------
    baby giz born 6th Feb 2011
    next one due 12th Aug 2013
     
  9. JoeyClare

    JoeyClare Well-Known Member

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    Hubby was probably in the dark as much as me before our NCT course. He did say he felt a lot more prepared after our last class on Saturday. I overheard him telling his friend all about what he'd learnt the other day! Had we not had the NCT course though, I imaging he'd be fairly clueless.
     
  10. Msclaireypants

    Msclaireypants Well-Known Member

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    My husband had never ever seen a birth not even on telly. His first wife had a c section.

    When I was pushing and the head was coming out he was shouting at the midwife and saying I must be dying cause what I was doing was impossible! Made him see me in a new light afterwards cause I had zero pain relief.

    I think he's a bit afraid of me now haha!


    Spencer David Wilcockson 28/2/2013 6lbs 3.5ozs
     
  11. Holi

    Holi Well-Known Member

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    Unfortunately my OH thinks he knows everything cos he's a farmer! Wish he'd stop comparing me to a cow!! :) x
     
  12. specialbump

    specialbump Well-Known Member

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    lmfao made me laugh lol im a cow in general but my o.h is ready this time was shocked how big the head actualy was first time and think he is scared about it because he hates not being able to do anything for me and seeing me in pain,just preying this baby stays 7lb ish for the birth hes coming in at 6.5 this weeks growth scan 3 weeks to go were more than ready for him now,
     
  13. l_maclean

    l_maclean Well-Known Member

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    My mates bought DH the Haynes daddy manual (like a car one!) last time - but I don't think he bothered to read it.
    For most stuff his opinion last time was 'well its you that has to go through it' which I was happy with.

    I asked him the other week if ge was prepared for the possibility he might have to deliver this one himself ( I had quite a quick labour last time despite her being back to back!) and he looked totally unphased. Lol


    On my iPhone - so cant see tickers :(
     
  14. umbongo

    umbongo Well-Known Member

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    My husband has two kids so he's done it all before. Albeit with someone twice my size (LMAO...BITCHY!) So I'm lucky in that respect. Will be interested to see him cope as he's the most chilled person ever so he should be a great presence to have! Xx
     
  15. Hope81

    Hope81 Well-Known Member

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    My oh is a doctor and still wasn't prepared for what's to come....
    He knew I was getting an epidural as I needed invasive monitoring so he thought everything will be just oh so easy....
    For sure he wasn't prepared for an epidural that failed at 10 cm then 6 h wait for tw baby to turn in the optimal position with a drip and no pain relief, me crying 6 h solid with my head buried in his arms, a forceps with no pain relief and a failed local spinal in my foofoo that hurt more than the forceps and the delivery all together....
    By the end of it all he declared that if I want one more it will be either an adoption or a c section :lol:
    Me on the other hand I was fit to get up 10 min after labour and looking generally better than he did ha ha...

    Even the most prepared they have it all coming so I doubt it really matters there prepared or not lol
     
  16. LYLLJellyTots

    LYLLJellyTots Well-Known Member

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    I think as much as it might be nice for him to read up on things and know what they are.. Him knowing what a sweep is wont change the support he gives you during labour x this is prob more to do with your anxieties about the birth than about him in all honesty Hun and what you are really wanting is reassurance from him that he will be there every step of the way x

    Hugs xxxx
     
  17. LoopyLouize

    LoopyLouize Well-Known Member

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    The stories on this thread have made my day lol!

    My OH got the shock of his life last time, he actually promised to "treat me" to an expensive gift as a token of his appreciation.. 17 months on and I am still waiting for my gift lol! He obviously said it in the heat of the moment.... so I have 4 weeks left maybe less maybe more before we do it all again and I can tell he had forgotten how bad it all actually is..... he dares promise me another gift and ill knock his head off!

    Sent from my GT-I8190N using Tapatalk 2
     
  18. umbongo

    umbongo Well-Known Member

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    I'd be demanding that gift this time loopylouize! Don't let him wriggle out of it!! :).x
     
  19. Corrinne37

    Corrinne37 Well-Known Member

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    My Oh is clueless!!
    No idea what a sweep ir anything is.
    He was obviously there at te birth of my son and yes was in a daze, dozing in the chair the whole time and when my son had to be rushed to SCBU he was like well im going for a kip.
    I was left in bits wondering if baby would be ok, luckily my mum was there through the whole thing, as she ended up taking me to the hospital when my waters broke and ended up staying, im so glad she did as she was my rock!!!

    I am setting up a meeting with both of them on Monday evening, (i want my mum there again) and |I will brief them of my birth plan, and what I expect of them, and also for them to listen to my hypnobirthing cd and just get some understanding of the whole thing. So hopefully OH will be more prepped this time.
    But he would never do anythung off his own back, like read up on it, hes way too blokey for that!!!!!
     
    #19 Corrinne37, Jul 4, 2013
    Last edited: Jul 4, 2013
  20. Corrinne37

    Corrinne37 Well-Known Member

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    this is very true xxxx
     

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