In Laws

[littlemuffin]

Is anyone else living with their in-laws, or is your OH is living with your parents.

We currently are, as my DH wanted to go back to uni, and I couldn't afford the rent and bills all on my own.

I am a bit worried about when the baby comes, that they are going to be a bit on top of me, and I don't really feel at home. I wanted to get up the other night but was told that I wake the dog up. (Their dog is their world, and god forbid I do anything to upset it.)

I am just worried that I am going to be in our bedroom the whole time, and right at this moment I just wish it was a little bit different.

 

[Bee7]

Bless you hun, that doesn't sound fun at all. I couldn't imagine living with my OH's mother *shudder*. I'm guessing you don't feel fully at ease, like you're a guest in someone elses home and have to ask permission rather than just doing what you want, when you want. When baby comes this will probably grate a bit. Is there any chance you could apply for social housing or something? You'd probably be entitled to some benefits if your OH is a student? I guess it's very generous of your in-laws to let you stay with him and you could always use this time to save up as much money as poss for a deposit or something? xxx

 

[BabyBrain]

Funnily enough lol I have just been watching an argument between my in laws about painting their new much smaller bedroom cos we are getting the bigger one . We live with them and although my FIL can be the biggest asshole on the planet, since I've been pregnant he's been a diamond. He's decorating all the rooms we need and will be paying for a 2 bed extension on the house .

Chances are you will feel better for having other adults to talk to when baby arrives and your OH is out at uni. I am thinking that in the long term living here will be better for our finances and therefore better for Albert.

If it gets really bad I am sure there's room under the patio for them though so all is not lost xxxxxxxxx

 

[l_maclean]

Is there anyway you could talk to them about how your feeling?? MY bro and now SIL lived with my parents after they're first was born - she was nearly a year old when they finallly got their own place - but listening to my parents - they felt just as awkward as Kirsty did. They were worried about stepping on toes, and little things that they'd normally have done in their house they didnt feel able to.

I know in-laws can be a nightmare - god know i couldnt imagine living with mine - but as much as you feel you'd have to hide in your room the whole time - that might really offend them. They prob want you to feel as at home as possible. xxx

 

[jojo_2012]

I couldn't bare it. Aren't you entitled to housing benefit and isn't he entitled to jobseekers?

 

[littlemuffin]

He is at Uni until July, and then about August we will look for somewhere to live where he can get a job. So it wont be that long.

They are doing us a massive favour, and my parents did offer, but my mum was worried as she has 2 cats that go where they want in the house to sleep, they might try and get in with the baby, where his parents only have the dog.

I am not sure on the benefits front, I am working and saving like mad, we have our deposit on a house ready, it's just getting to that final step. They are nice to me, of course there are the odd moments when it's a bit too much. Like last night our room basically flooded, there was water coming down the walls, and in one corner there is like a large green patch, and when they saw, they were like, well what can we do about it. ERM, we have a baby coming in here in 2 months. They just leave everything, until it become so much of a hassel they have to get it sorted.

Thank you girls for your replies and Baby Brain for me not feeling like I am the only one who doesn't have a house, and that all set up.

 

[Zoeox]

I live with my parents, and OH lives with us, obviously I see it different to him but I do feel sorry for him living with us, although he has lived here for a long time now. My In laws are worried they won't get to see LO as much now but I will make sure we go visit them often with LO so it's shared out. I think its difficult when you live with other people and don't have your own space, we are rather lucky in the sense I'm an only child so we have our own living room, own bedroom and the nursery, although we are hoping to move out before the nursery actually gets put to use. xx

 

[BabyBrain]

I think the plan is for us to stay here. We are applying to have a 2 bed extension on the back of the house (most houses down our road have them already) which in time means we inherit a 5 bed house in a rich area. The gardens still big enough for grandad to turf a mini football pitch for Albert