- Joined
- Sep 15, 2010
- Messages
- 13,877
- Reaction score
- 14
Hi ladies...
I don't want to go into dramatics but I've got two sleeps left til my appointment and I'm actually terrified.
It's a mix of feeling scared, excited, confused and happy all at the same time! I guess the reality is hitting me that we're going to see a "proper" doctor and hopefully get some help in getting pregnant.
I've been on my own all afternoon as DH's been out and I've been thinking a lot about Tuesday's appointment...What we'll say, what will the doctor ask, will he do a scan or just prescribe something, will it take a long time to get somewhere?
In between thinking through different possible outcomes, I've been browsing Facebook and noticed all the girls I went to school with who are having their second babies or are pissed off that they've fallen pregnant and the FOB has buggered off or whatever.... It frustrates me that I'm on the other side of the screen and having to go clinical for my baby.
I'm 21 years old and I'm having help with my fertility.
I hate how bratty and OTT that might sound but I don't think I looked at it that way before. It was more "I'm married, the time feels right for a baby, let's get cracking" without even thinking of the additional bits to TTC.
I'm scared it won't work.
I'm scared DH will go through all the pressures and stresses of fertility stuff he went through with his previous partner. I don't want to put him through that again.
On the other hand, I feel really excited that it WILL work, we'll fall pregnant and I'll be thinking "oh feck, what have we done?" I've had 2 dreams this week of me having a baby girl, both felt so real and I wondered whether it was a sign. I know I need to be realistic but I can't help it. Doesn't everyone in LTTTC dream of their babies?
I don't want to expect too much from my gyno appointment, I know I won't walk away from it pregnant (wish it was that easy!) but I'm going to throw a tonne of PMA at it!
Sorry for the pointless thread, not expecting replies but I just needed to empty my brain of these thoughts, they've been swimming around for hours.
x x
I don't want to go into dramatics but I've got two sleeps left til my appointment and I'm actually terrified.
It's a mix of feeling scared, excited, confused and happy all at the same time! I guess the reality is hitting me that we're going to see a "proper" doctor and hopefully get some help in getting pregnant.
I've been on my own all afternoon as DH's been out and I've been thinking a lot about Tuesday's appointment...What we'll say, what will the doctor ask, will he do a scan or just prescribe something, will it take a long time to get somewhere?
In between thinking through different possible outcomes, I've been browsing Facebook and noticed all the girls I went to school with who are having their second babies or are pissed off that they've fallen pregnant and the FOB has buggered off or whatever.... It frustrates me that I'm on the other side of the screen and having to go clinical for my baby.
I'm 21 years old and I'm having help with my fertility.
I hate how bratty and OTT that might sound but I don't think I looked at it that way before. It was more "I'm married, the time feels right for a baby, let's get cracking" without even thinking of the additional bits to TTC.
I'm scared it won't work.
I'm scared DH will go through all the pressures and stresses of fertility stuff he went through with his previous partner. I don't want to put him through that again.
On the other hand, I feel really excited that it WILL work, we'll fall pregnant and I'll be thinking "oh feck, what have we done?" I've had 2 dreams this week of me having a baby girl, both felt so real and I wondered whether it was a sign. I know I need to be realistic but I can't help it. Doesn't everyone in LTTTC dream of their babies?
I don't want to expect too much from my gyno appointment, I know I won't walk away from it pregnant (wish it was that easy!) but I'm going to throw a tonne of PMA at it!
Sorry for the pointless thread, not expecting replies but I just needed to empty my brain of these thoughts, they've been swimming around for hours.
x x
Last edited: