I'm at my wits end now and don't know what to do

emylou

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my son is 20 months old and weighs 21lb and 0.5 oz's he is 81 cm tall and is refusing to eat. we have been to docs twice and they keep saying we will review in a month or two....they have told me to put him on a high calorie diet but this is making him act out and he thinks it is funny to punch me. today i have taken him to my mums as she looks after him whilst i work a few hours and he has refused to eat a thing... so since 9am until now at 4:30 he has had half a bowl of cherios. this is getting to be a regular thing with him.
 
There are so many tricks to get kids to eat and I'm sure you've tried them all already. Isaac eats well but refuses some things before he has even tried them. I find that eating round other children at playgroup has really helped him to eat new things and also telling him that his friends eat certain things makes him eat them. Kids copy other kids so it might be worth a try if you think its behavioural. I got Isaac to eat cheese for the first time a week or so ago by telling him that Maddie at playgroup loves cheese.

Good luck x
 
I've no personal experience but wanted to give you these :hug: :hug: :hug: and tell you about my best friends 2 boys. They're now 7 and 3yrs old, they NEVER ate well as toddlers, under 2yrs, they could go hours on a bite of a sandwhich :shock: My friend worried sick about them both, but I must say they are now both very happy, healthy and eating much better.

Her GP settled her mind one day by simply saying he's never known a toddler die from starvation in England and he didn't see toddlers choosing it anytime soon.

Toddlers are very body conscious and know when they are hungry and eat when they are hungry. I would suggest offering little snacks as often as possible, and also offering him food when you are eating, and letting him see you eat. If you do all those things anyway then I hope you find some relief in that because you are doing everything you can, he sounds active and full of character. There's also the old classic of taking him shopping with you, letting him choose, prepare, cook and eat different vegetables, fruits, I just think if there was any concerns your GP would have been more aggressive in their advice, though suggesting high calories isn't great advice in my opinion but I'm not a qualified GP.

If you feel that's effecting him negatively I'd just stop, talk to your LO about what he wants, go from there. I'm sure he will be just fine, I really hope everything works out for you :hug: Like I said I've no personal experience and I'm just trying to think what might help, I just hope you go easy on yourself, forcing LO's to do anything is never received well :hug:
 
DD often went through stages where she wouldn't eat... used to worry my mum silly but not me.. My GP told me that a two year old does not have the mental capacity to starve themselves intentionally and as long as they weren't listless and loosing weight rapidly then it wasn't anything to worry about.

I was told to give Tia lots and lots of milk (either plain or chocolate) and to make it full fat milk. Tia was lactose intolerant so I used the soya milk with load of nesquick and well that went down really well... :) As long as they are drinking then that is the most important thing.

Also I was advised to give her choices at her meals (just between two options) because two year olds tend to start wanting to take control. So the option meant that they thought they were taking control of the situation. Also never to make the meal the issue, food went down for a set amount of time if it went uneaten it was taken away. Nothing else was offered afterwards like sweets or crisps and no comments were made.

After a few months of eating barely nothing, all of a sudden she would eat like a horse for a few weeks then go back to eating nothing at all... You get used to it after a while...

She's a really healthy 8 year old now, she eats her meals (not everything all the time, but she sits down and eats something and again during growth times, she eats everything and then some)...Now she's at an age where she's more picky... but she's old enough to make those distinctions now... Apparently she's "allergic" to onions.. :rotfl:

Take heart your LO is not the only one, and the more he sees other people (either kids or yourselves) eating the more likely he is to join in with eating. :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

Oh and what redshoes says about forcing your LO's do ANYTHING is never well received.. well there was never a truer word said.. the more you try and force them, the more they will resist... if they think you don't care... then they will just get on with it.
 
If I want Isaac to eat something, like last night I chopped him up a banana, and he refuses it as soon as I put it on his tray then rather than take it away from him I turn my back and start wiping the sides down or washing up and when he see's he's not getting a reaction 9 times out of 10 he will just eat it. He ate half of his banana last night when initially he had pushed it away. It is so true what the other girls have said, you have to negotiate and use reverse physcology sometimes to get them to do what you want. You can't force them but you can get your own way without them even realising it.

Lou :)
 
the main thing is he has repeatedly lost weight he doesnt seem to get above 21lb no matter what i do.
he has started to lick and gag on food, when he does eat the food i have been suggested to offer him he gets out of control.

when he goes to his dads they give him anything he wants whether its good for him or not. he doesnt have to eat fruit or veg there.

i phoned the docs on friday after i posted on here and spoke to the main childrens doctor at my surgery he has been looking after him for the last three months since my health visitor listened to me and took notice that he wasnt eating properely and we are having blood tests done in the morning. he has to fast for the blood tests though. they are doing a coeliac screen and a diabetes test and checking liver function, thyroid function, a full blood count, iron levels and all that. i know it sounds evil but im glad they are doing it. i have been telling my health visitor and my doc for months that something isnt right with him. they have also refered him to a piediatrician (sorry can't spell) so they will finally sort this out.

there is something stopping him from eating there has to be. he used to eat loads....then one day he just turned now i am lucky if he eats a full weaning bowl size of cereal.

Am i over reacting??
 

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