I can't cope any more

Discussion in 'Second Trimester' started by debecca, Nov 19, 2007.

  1. debecca

    debecca Well-Known Member

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    Well I think I've just about had it with my job.

    Today I taught every single lesson had no break, no time for a wee or even a sit down, and now I have to go home and mark 6 bits of A level coursework and Year 8 books before tomorrow.

    I have no classroom of my own and nowhere to work provided in school so I'm carting heavy books round everywhere.

    I teach more than anyone else in the school at the moment.

    I'm completely overwhelmed today as it's reports and assessments deadline for my biggest year group too. I barely coped with this job before I got pregnant but now I'm a wreck.

    I just rang my OH in floods of tears and he is great and wants to help me come up with strategies but I don't even think I can make it in tomorrow any more. I feel so depressed and overwhelmed by it all.

    Now I have to drive the half hour home across country lanes in the dark while crying without running over any sheep. Great.

    Sorry for the rant, I really have reached the end of my tether today :cry:
     
  2. debecca

    debecca Well-Known Member

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    Oh and I should probably say that wondering about how this is all affecting Maurice is making it 100 times worse :cry:

    Poor SheMaurice.
     
  3. Tillytots

    Tillytots Well-Known Member

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    oh hun! Im feeling crap too today. :cry: :cry: Dry your eyes sweetie and drive safelty home and have a good cry when you're indoors :hug: :hug: Il be around later for a chat if you like

    xxxx
     
  4. littlepip

    littlepip Well-Known Member

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    aww bless you :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:
    Try and calm down i was like that yesterday. Maybe have a nice bath before you go to bed and relax.
    im sure maurice will be fine xx :hug: :hug:
     
  5. loz

    loz Well-Known Member

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    What's the boss like? Can they help reduce your workload? :hug:
     
  6. GBLiz

    GBLiz Well-Known Member

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    i know how you feel, the contract i was working on while i was weeks 10-16 i was working manic 12 hour days with no time to eat or even go to the loo, no exaggeration i would have a sandwich there by me and every time i took a bite someone else came in i had to deal with so by the end of the day i would have eaten half a sandwich and i'd be shaking with exhaustion

    I know legally blah blah blah but sometimes in practise we ARE under more pressure than we're supposed to be


    Like you I was also really quite worried about how the baby would be affected by the stress hormones

    The good news is now i had my 20 week scan and everything is perfect, we might fall apart but the baby is ok, and i'm sure maurice is too.

    In the meantime could you have a chat with your boss and see if you can get more support??
     
  7. Nicola g

    Nicola g Well-Known Member

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  8. flowergirl

    flowergirl Well-Known Member

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    I've PM'd you
     
  9. kalia

    kalia Well-Known Member

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    :hug: :hug:
    I put in writing to my school that I wanted a risk assessment done on my job as like you I do not have my own classroom. They are making me a little 'office' in the corner of the staffroom and supplying me with chairs so I can sit when teaching. :dance:
    Maybe if you put in writing to the school a request for a risk assessment listing your concerns they will adjust things for you. My school did it because they are lovely. To be honest (please don't be offended) from what you've said in the past your school sounds awful! But maybe giving an offical letter (with copies to more than one person, maybe the head and the governers?) will make them worry that they could be legally responsible for any problems arising from their neglect of you.
    Not that I think there will be problems with Maurice - it seems to me these little creatures we are growing are fairly resilient. It's you I'm worried about :(
    :hug: :hug:
     
  10. Bee

    Bee Well-Known Member

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    Hope u are feeling better
    I know how you feel - I am a teacher too but I am in my probation year and it is tough. I haven't told the school yet apart from a few people so its even harder :(
     
  11. Bloom

    Bloom Well-Known Member

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    Aw i hope your ok. :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: I dont really know what advice to offer but like everyone else said can you have a word with your boss. Have you thought about moving your maternity leave forward as all this stress is not good for you but these little babies are stronger than you think and im sure little Maurice is doing just fine.

    Have you had more movements i think ive had a few.

    Just think only 3 weeks till the big scan day :cheer: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer: that should cheer you up.

    Oh and if it makes you feel better my boiler and washing machine have broke so i have no hot water, no heating and now nowhere to wash my clothes!
    You know where i am if you want to chat :hug:
     
  12. muppetmummy

    muppetmummy Well-Known Member

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    :hug: :hug: I would definately speak to your boss, it sounds like they're expecting far too much of you
     
  13. Magic Monkey

    Magic Monkey Well-Known Member

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    Can you speak to your head/head of department and tell them that you are not coping at the moment? I am fairly sure that schools (and poss all employers) have to do a risk assessment of you as soon as they find out you are pregnant and then again throughout your pregnancy (mine did one at about 16 wks, which was a standard form)

    If your school aren't supportive, go to your docs and get them to sign you off, i am sure they won't have any problem doing it esp if you explain everything that is happening to you.
     
  14. kalia

    kalia Well-Known Member

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    That's a brilliant idea from Sass - I feel a bit stupid for not thinking of that as the doctor offered to sign me off :wall: It sounds like you really need a break and unless you work supply this way you would get a paid break until you feel more like yourself. Also it might spur the school on to sort things as it is far cheaper to off-load some of your classes onto other teachers than to pay for cover teachers.
    Let us know how you get on.
    :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:
     
  15. Happybunny

    Happybunny Well-Known Member

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    Aw Rebecca honey :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

    Teaching is very hard work!. It sounds as though you need to confide in someone you can trust at work, someone who you know will sympathise and take your case to the head for you, if you feel you can't go yourself.

    Everyone who has mentioned the risk assessment is right. I had one done and the school have made provision so that I can just nip off to the loo or have a sit down etc when needed. The head has not been chasing me for all the usual paperwork too, obviously it is better for me to get it done (I need to know what I am doing), but I don't have to do everything so long winded and formally.

    I know that you work at a public school so the pressure to perform can be intense. You need to put the health of yourself and your baby first. Prioritise your work load...who cares if your lesson plan is a few notes scribbled on A4? You don't need to be writing every objective and outcome and activity in detail, I am sure you are an experienced teacher and know what you are doing. As for marking...admittedly that is a massive job, especially at A level too. I would explain your feelings and get some additional PPA time so that you can assess the work accurately and not have to be working at night time, when you should be resting. Your managment team have a responsibility to help you, please, please, please don't be afraid to ask for what you are entitled to.


    i am thinking of you honey :hug: :hug: :hug:
     
  16. Bloom

    Bloom Well-Known Member

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    Rebecca how you feeling today? :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

    I think what Sass said is a brill idea about getting signed off even if its for a little while just to give you a break. You have to put yourself and Maurice first. :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:
     
  17. Ginnymarie

    Ginnymarie Well-Known Member

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    Hi pet

    i work in a college but used to be a teacher and god i know how it feels hon, i ended up being signed off for 7 weeks and thank god i did, i was a wreck, the doc was amazing, I mean HR are being a pain wanting docs reports but hey.....please take it easy if you can and im thinking of youxx
     
  18. debecca

    debecca Well-Known Member

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    First of all thank you thank you thank you for all your lovely messages of support :hug:

    I haven't had time (!) to come on here for a little while but I wanted to let you know that I'm bearing up, just about. I took the advice some of you gave and went to see my Head of Department to let him know how I feel and what's going on, and although he was very supportive of me maybe not being able to keep on top of marking and whatever he basically said that there's nothing he can do, the school is sh1t and everyone feels the same! :wall:

    I've made an appointment to see my deputy head later in the week so I'll let you know how that goes. In the meantime I'm going to soldier through till Christmas and look forward to my 11pm finish tomorrow night joy of joys :sleep:

    I know Maurice is my number 1 priority at the moment and he hasn't half been letting me know it today by kicking me virtually all day - and I'm REALLY starting to feel it now so regretting wishing for it!!!!!

    Right, now I have to:

    * write Year 9 reports.
    * Mark M1 work.
    * Plan 2 sixth form revision lessons.
    * Turn up the hem on my maternity trousers cos I'm fed up of them dragging along the ground.
    * Try not to lose my mind.

    I'LL BE FINE! I had another minibreakdown today and the Head of Science tried to make me go to the doctor and get signed off but I really don't think I can do it - the only people whose lives it would affect are the kids, not the sh1tty school, and that would make me feel awful.

    Not long to go till Christmas, chin up.

    And BIG UP all the teachers out there. I swear we do one of the hardest jobs in the world! :roll:

    Thanks again for everyone's help and support xxxxxx
     
  19. Bloom

    Bloom Well-Known Member

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    Glad to see your feeling a little better hun. :hug: :hug: :hug:
     
  20. debecca

    debecca Well-Known Member

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    I'm worse again today but I think after a while feeling this low you start to get used to it and crying in the middle of the day becomes completely normal.

    I was on duty till 11pm last night so I am absolutely shattered today.
     

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