husband thinks im unattractive

[Dolly84]

im feeling really down in the dumps at the moment my husband told me how him and his work mates were saying pregnant women dont look attractive so i was like thanx and he was like no dont be like that but be honest it dont look great, this has left me feeling so self concious and quite sad obviously im still wanting some attention from him but now i feel like i dont want him to even see me naked or even look at me i feel disgusting. anyone else having the same problem? xxx

 

[Young Mum 21 x]

what a stupid and immature thing to say! we have to go through all the pain, stretchmarks,
weight gain and what do they do ?? come out with some utter bull like that!!
its not long term and its perfectly natural.. i think a pregnant belly is abs gorgeous!!
chin up and set him straight!!! xxx

 

[i.love]

hm... that's not a very nice thing to say! But I guess at least he is being honest.

I think that the way guys look at us depend a lot on the way we see ourselves. If you feel unattractive and self-cautious then men might not find you especially sexy either. But if you feel sexy and gorgeous, and are confident, then they will look at you differently!

I suggest treating yourself to some lovely new underwear. Someone mentioned company HotMilk recently - they do have very nice maternity lingerie!

Or you could get yourself a new dress or a top, do your manicure, pedicure and make-up. For me this is a constant confidence boost.

xx

 

[teampc]

what?

honestly if my hubby dared say something like that to me he would be lucky to still be breathing by the time I was done with him, what a horrible and hurtfull thing to say, id have gone flipping mental at him.

urgh mens stupid unthoughtful comments drive me mad

I think you should explain to him that this is a big enough thing to be going through as it is without him making you feel bad about your body as well, he is the one person in the world who should be telling you how amazing and gorgeous you look, anything less in unacceptable

my hubby seems to like my bump and certainly still tells me how fab i look

 

[Iriki]

What a horrible hurtful thing to say
I know, none of us will look like swimsuit models by the time we're 6 months pregnant but honestly...what an insensitive thing to say.
Hubby is one of those quiet, deep, doesn't say a lot types of men but he spent most of my first pregnancy talking to my bump, and rubbing my tummy whenever he got a chance.
He was aware of the hormonal moodswings and changes to my body enough to know what to do /say and what not to do or say. And he read all the books I did.

Maybe your OH just needs some education - has he read anything in preparation for this pregnancy and the birth... and more importantly for afterwards and looking after baby!!! Load him up with some reading material and maybe he'll be more aware of whats going on and be more sensitive

 

[Lou_1]

my OH loves my pregnant belly lol or he says he does he prob gives me more compliments now that he even did... I think hel be sad when i dont have the belly lol x

 

[Sparkle24]

What a silly thing to say. My Oh said to me the other day when i get a belly its going to look so nice as his baby is in there.

Sod everyone else.
Have a nice romantic night in and see where it goes i bet you will feel better then

 

[Blondy locks x]

What a childish thing to say!! Its what women have to go through in order to have babies, are they completely numb or what! At the end of the day if these men want kids then there girlfriends/ wives will all go through pregnancy at some point! Honestly some men make you fuming!

Dont listen to what they say darling, i mean look at holly willoughby, jessica alba and natalie portman. There all absolutely gorgeous with baby bumps and i bet none of them men would kick them out of bed despite them being pregnant haha!

Just enjoy your pregnancy and dont listen to any of them idiots x x x

 

[clairebear22]

What a terrible thing to say!

My OH takes every opportunity to grab hold of my belly and have a 'chat' with his boy! He'd never ever say I was unattractive because i'm pregnant, in fact he still wolf whistles when he sees me getting dressed or undressed despite me feeling like a whale at the moment!! He wouldn't have any balls left if he did say something bad!! Just ignore him, you're growing a human being so be proud of your ever growing belly! x

 

[cherrybinky]

Oh Dolly thats an awful silly thing for him to say How mean. Women go through a lot and their bodies are bound to change and its for the beautiful amazing new little life youre growing. My OH thinks pregnant women are gorgeous and sexy and he loves all my lumps and bumps and thats before I have a pg bump!
I think your man needs a bitch slap from several pg women
X

 

[abbiecourt]

kill him chop his knob of lol, do u know what i get more attention of men when i pregnant then when am not sometimes i ask myself if they cannot see my bump but its huge and not hard to miss, if my fella was not happy wiv the way i look they he be out x

 

[cherrybinky]

LOL @Abbie Bobbit him lol

 

[inky]

That's so insensitive of him!!

I think the Bobbit job might be a bit extreme, especially if you ever want to be pregnant again lol! I would lock him in a room full of heavily pregnant women, tell them what he'd said, then see what happens!

 

[Callum]

I beleive honesty is the best policy, but somethings a better off not said.
would you rather him be honest, or not?
i personally think pregnancy is a beautiful thing so i wouldnt mind if my fiance was the size of a house i will still say she is beautiful (that doesn't mean i want to take her to the bedroom every 10 minutes!! lol).
im sure your O/H thinks you are beautiful, but some men are squeemish and others are eroused by pregnancy,
this is not an "error of choice", this is mearly a natural opinion that all men and women are entitled to.
dont let it get you down, i know its easier said than done but just make sure you both have some time available on a frequent basis to open up about how you feel...... you will feel alot better =D

Hope this helps.

 

[cherelle]

Hmmm he doesnt sound like a very nice person, thats very harsh!

My OH would never say it and i know he loves me - we are very close atm, however i know he isnt sexually attracted to me at this size and to be honest i dont blame him! We have only had sex twice during this entire pregnancy but to be honest i dont really mind, i dont feel overly sexy but i know after the birth ill be able to get sexy again and our relationship can survive be still be enjoyable without sex until then x

 

[Piglet10]

ok... im gonna play devils advocate !!

IF i was a man i wouldnt find a pregnant woman attractive, apart from knowing it was our baby in there but as for sexually attractive no.... BUT i dont think that means he wishes you werent pregnant or doesnt still want you or fancy you...

I think you should buy some nice lingerie the baby doll type that would look so cute with a bump and surprise him with how good you can look xxx

 

[i.love]

ok... im gonna play devils advocate !!

IF i was a man i wouldnt find a pregnant woman attractive, apart from knowing it was our baby in there but as for sexually attractive no.... BUT i dont think that means he wishes you werent pregnant or doesnt still want you or fancy you...

I think you should buy some nice lingerie the baby doll type that would look so cute with a bump and surprise him with how good you can look xxx

I agree. I think if I was a man I might find a pregnant girl attractive, but only if it was my child and only if she felt and behaved attractive too.

However, I must add, I would not tell this openly to my pg wife.

 

[suzzi]

i know how you feel, ive just posted a thread about stretch marks on '1st trimester' turns a lovely thing into feeling sefl consious and horrible. OH really dont have a brain when it comes to thinking before they speak!!

 

[Cantstop]

However, I must add, I would not tell this openly to my pg wife.

 

[Froslass]

I've asked my OH about this, and he said it's a diffrent type of attraction completely. He said i'm not sexy in the same way I was before, but my curves are still very sexy, and the fact that I;m no longer just his partner, but the mother of his child makes him more attracted to me x
He said it's strange, he can't describe it...

I think guys are just twats sometimes! They don't think before they speak!

OH was seriously ill with swine flu, in hospital, lost a lot of weight...He was very very thin before, but after this he was literally skeletal...you could see his ribs, it was quite honestly repulsive..
I never found him sexy like that, but the fact he was ok and better and I could cuddle him and stuff again made me realise how much I love him and I was attracted to him more in a diffrent way? If you know what i mean? I never told him i didn't like his stick figure lol x He put the weight back on though gradually and is now ok x