How often?

Sunflower1

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So my fertility doctor said we should dtd every other day in my fertility window, but we've had no luck so far. What's everyone's approaches? I think my other half would run out of steam if we tried every day. And do you wait til your fertility window or start before? This month I waited til day 12 (was gonna aim for days 12, 14 and 16 as my BBT usually rises on day 17) and now seem to have ovulated early for once (day 12) so am kicking myself that we might have missed this month. Plus the EWCM has disappeared.

My husband doesn't have unlimited energy so am trying to pace it but also have as much chance as possible. This TTC stuff is so frustrating!

Thanks for any advice!
 
Hi, Sunflower1!

We dtd pretty much every other day, or at least every three days, which is what my GP recommended. This month we got a bit overly enthusiastic, and managed it five days in a row when I reckoned I was ovulating. If his sperm are standard, hard-working boys, every other day is ideal. Is he taking zinc and vitamin c? They're supposed to be very helpful for swimmers!

How long have you been trying? We've been going eight months and I'm slowly losing the plot :D
 
Hi, thanks for replying. This is the fourth month we've managed to dtd on schedule. We started trying spring 2015 but then discovered I had some hormonal and fertility problems which we've hopefully dealt with now after a lot of weight loss. Then my husband had lots of health problems which interferred with us being able to try and he's still a bit run down. I also have to not tell him 'I'm ovulating today!' as that freaks him out.

Yes he's on zinc and we eat lots of vitamin c rich food. I'm trying to get him to reduce his caffeine intake too.

Not surprised you are getting frustrated at 8 months. 5 days in a row is pretty epic...hope it works for you this month. It's really hard not knowing isn't it?
 
Some men prefer not to know ins and outs of TTC. I keep ovulation days to myself. Ideal situation is to DTS every 2-3 days before opk gets positive and then every day once opk is positive.
Choose his fav positions to make him more interested. X

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We do it every day during the fertility window (when I spot the beginning of EWCM). And then every 2 to 3 days... But we both have different schedules and I am abroad a lot, so we do it a lot when we're home together.
 
We tried to dtd everyday over my fertile window and every other day either side of it usually, sometimes things don't work out that way though and I don't think it helps to get stressed about missing a day etc. Something else we tried was to do a mix of mornings and evenings (I usually ovulate in the evening but before we have gone to bed, so I had a bit of a theory about doing it in the morning to have the sperm there fresh ready and waiting!).

My oh liked to know when there was an egg due but some men don't like the pressure. He also liked to do some dress up over the fertile window as he said it helped to invigorate his sperm (any excuse for the stockings as far as I can see, but helps to keep it fun!).

The cycle we got this bfp we dtd two days before ov, ov day and every day for three days afterwards. We also dtd before and after that but I'm pretty sure it would have been the ov day sperm that got there, or possibly the ones from the day before. I was expecting to ov a day later than I did so I had planned on everything being a day further on but it seems that didn't matter.
 
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Thanks for the SMEP link and preseed recommendation Candy. I am thinking of using Preseed if it takes much longer. That's great about your BFP Snowbee! How brilliant! Good idea about the favourite positions Charlotte!

Thanks all for your responses...seems like every day after a positive test is common. I hadn't thought of switching to every day after a positive test. Really valuing the support on here. My husband gets really stressed if I go on about this stuff. I think it's a lot of pressure on him, so I try to act calm and laid back if I think I'm ovulating but it's really difficult!
 
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My husband gets really stressed if I go on about this stuff. I think it's a lot of pressure on him, so I try to act calm and laid back if I think I'm ovulating but it's really difficult!


I hear that! For a while DH was getting turned off my the pee sticks (I can't imagine why), so I stopped telling him when I was ovulating and started walking around the house in my most sexy/least comfortable pants, and little else. He knew what was going on, but at least we avoided the unsexy science talk!

To clarify, I don't think every day over the fertile period is necessary at all, it's just that we're a bit fed up of waiting and we were unusually excitable this month :D
 
My husband gets really stressed if I go on about this stuff. I think it's a lot of pressure on him, so I try to act calm and laid back if I think I'm ovulating but it's really difficult!


I hear that! For a while DH was getting turned off my the pee sticks (I can't imagine why), so I stopped telling him when I was ovulating and started walking around the house in my most sexy/least comfortable pants, and little else. He knew what was going on, but at least we avoided the unsexy science talk!

To clarify, I don't think every day over the fertile period is necessary at all, it's just that we're a bit fed up of waiting and we were unusually excitable this month :D

I make sure I hide all the pee sticks, thermometer, ovulations microscope, and also try and nonchalantly wear sexly underwear and not seem overly keen. Funny isn't it. Oh good, glad you don't think every day is necessary...think that would put him off.
 
I was trying for 8 months and caught on month 7 (chemical pregnancy) and 8 (10 weeks). The best day to dtd is the day before your temperature rises so that the swimmers are right up there in the fallopian tube waiting for eggy to be released.

I had an app that would try to predict my fertile window with BBT temps and would let him know the days we needed to think about BDing on earlier in the month, then aim for every other day at that time. I would only get 1 or 2 days with a positive OPK and we would aim to BD on at least one of days. If either of us weren't in the mood, we'd just leave it a day, or just know that we may not have maximised our chances that month.

On the months I got pregnant, we managed to dtd an extra day on the temp rise day (2 days in a row), used pre-seed and I didn't go to the loo afterwards and went to sleep. To keep his tackle in order, we decided that he would come as quickly as possible and leave the rest to foreplay (sorry if this is TMI). A bit mechanical but still fun!
 
at the moment we try for every other day but hubby works some long hours and some days he's just too tired so every 3 days ish.... we are on month 13 now with 1 loss in june. just keep at it. my cycles are all over the place from 27 days to 67 days so its pretty hit and miss for us
 
Congratulations Pambi! It's good to hear that not everyone does it every day. I know what you mean about being a bit mechanical...we do that sometimes to save energy. Awesome that it all worked for you.

Sorry about your loss Katie. That must be hard with different length cycles. 2 to 3 days is about what we manage in the fertile window with the occasional 2 in a row although trying to be more organised about it without killing the mood! I guess I am panicking as I am 41 in 2 months and every month it doesn't happen I get more and more despondent. Envy those women who get pregnant straight away.
 

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