Hi everyone. I need some help please

[Sammis]

Hi everyone, I'm very new to this, so I hope it ends up in the right place.
I'm crying out (literally) to anyone who will listen. I feel so alone and upset and i don't know what to do with myself- apart from cry, I'm good at that!!
Me and my husband have been together for 7 years and married for 3. We didn't start TTC until me were married because we wanted to 'do it traditionally'. We had the fairytale meeting, wedding, house and everything was going great until we tried to start trying to concieve!
We had nothing for a year but eventually became pregnant, but lost it at about 11 weeks, how my heart bled for that. Our fairytale was officially shattered! After another year and lots of tests and a treatment of clomid, i became pregnant again, only to lose that one at 12 weeks. That was in February, 2 days after my birthday!! I feel like my world is closing in on me.
So now I feel completely lost, my life is on pause, I HATE all of my friends who are having babies, every announcement is torture, especially the 'honeymoon babies'!
We have had the last course of clomid and I've just started my period so know that it's not worked. Every month I feel like a failure! And the waiting around from month to month is destroying me. My husband really tries to be supportive (bless him) but I know it's my fault, it's my body not working properly (even though I have a period each month, I don't ovulate-who knew that could happen?!) and I am so full of guilt because I know how much he wants a baby too. My closest friends don't really understand and I've never felt more alone than I do now. Sorry for thr giant essay, but even writing it down has helped in teeny smidge. Please help

 

[Lulla Bell]

Hello Im so sorry to hear this I cant personally help, But if you go down and post this in the ' trying to conceive' ' long term TTC' Section, someone will be able to help you xx

 

[Sammis]

Thank you xx

 

[sagags]

Aww I know exactly what you mean before getting pregnant with my son I had miscarried at 7 weeks and then my sister gets pregnant and is all "I don't understand why you can't be happier for me?" It was honestly awful. During the 2 years I had to wait, I did a few things not sure which actually helped but acupuncture was nice and relaxing, tried learning all i could about why I wasn't ovulating which was hard forced me to buck up and lose the 10 pounds i was trying to lose. Learned all I could about cervical mucus with a Catholic natural family planning physician who would take what my cycle look liked and translate it into what he could do for me. I liked that but then got caught up with moving across the country and we decided to put a pause until after we moved. Tried a Natural Fertility Cleanse and accidentally gotten pregnant on that cycle when I honestly wasn't trying. I even went as far while I was 4 weeks pregnant (not knowing) took progesterone to induce a period for them to check my tubes and never got my period.

With all that I know its hard and it sucks and its easier said than done but relaxing and putting less pressure on yourself might take you far! Breath you have let the universe know what you want and it will deliver! GL and baby dust to you!