hey im new!

Discussion in 'Introductions' started by Lari, Mar 28, 2006.

  1. Lari

    Lari New Member

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    Hey! im new here, just found this site. Im 21 and am now in my 13th week of pregnancy. Its been quite a ride since we found out! Sickness being the worst thing so far and the fact ive gone off most of my favourite foods!

    As i said im 21 and one of the reasons i have looked for a site likethis is as young parents to be we have been treated like we havwe no idea what we are doing (even tho the pregnancy was [planned) and the amount of people patronisingus for doing this young is incredible. Not a single doctor has treated us with an ounce of respect and the nurses at the hospital look down on us and although the midwife was really nice, she still didnt take us seriously when we explained what we would like out of the pregnancy.

    Sorry for going off on a bit of a rant there, but hwat do other people think? do u think 21 is too young to start a family these days?
     
  2. Sarah&Braydon

    Sarah&Braydon Well-Known Member

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    ahhhh ur from norwich dont tell me ur an ncfc fan

    i am 18 and a single parent to a 6 month old boy called braydon andrew, i was with his dad 4 yrs then he did a runner, i think ur happy ur going look after ur bubs well and love him her thats all he/she need
     
  3. rach

    rach Well-Known Member

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    hi and welcome to the forum congratulations on your pregnancy :D
    i found when i had my first child at 20 i was treated like that :(
    this time round they have all been lovely you need to tell them straight make sure you are very clear and very firm about what you want throughout your pregnancy when they see that your not to be messed with and that you know what you are talking about they will soon change their attitude xxxxx
     
  4. lauramumof2

    lauramumof2 Well-Known Member

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    I found them quite patronising even though I was 26. Its as if because you are a first time mum then you dont know anything. Of course there are things you are sure of but they are there to guide you.

    One thing I would say though is be firm and vocal about what you want. If you think something they say you cant get isnt right then say to them and come on here and check, someone will always know something on here.

    Thistime round I have been pretty much left to it and hopefully it will stay that way, I found the hv especially unhelpfull.
     
  5. amyknight88

    amyknight88 Well-Known Member

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    Hello and Welcome to the forum!

    I agree with everyone this site is very helpful. I don't think 21 is too young to start a family at all. Im 17 and have a little boy. All i can say is GOOD LUCK and CONGRATULATIONS.

    Amy
     
  6. Dreamer

    Dreamer Well-Known Member

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    Hello and welcome :D Good luck with your pregnancy :D
     
  7. sophie

    sophie Well-Known Member

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    hi i was 21 when i had my 1st baby, im now 25 an i must say this time is much better, 1 because im more aware of whats goin on an 2 well im gettin treated with a bit more respect so i agree.
    just try an enjoy your pregnancy though an dont let it spoil it good luck xx
     
  8. Kelly G

    Kelly G Well-Known Member

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    Hi

    Im kelly i am 23 and pregnant with my 2nd child! had my 1st at 17! I know what you mean about the docs and nurses thing i got it a lot when i was pregnant with my daughter!
    If you need any advice or anything just PM me!

    kelly
     
  9. lmwarr

    lmwarr Well-Known Member

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    My god some people! Tell them to stick it up their [email protected]#e if they have anything else to say.

    21 is not too young plenty of people start a family younger and they are totally happy and have great lives.

    As long as you are happy nothing else matters.

    Oh and welcome! x x
     
  10. madmish

    madmish Well-Known Member

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    i was 21 when i had my first, and was also a single parent.i am now 29 with three kids,one on the way and i have been married for 6 years.i found the medical staff do treat you differntly if you are younger, they were shoving leaflets and benefits down my throat!! friends were coming out with remarks like oh your mum and dad aren't short of a bob or two, like i was after money all the time!!!but i decided,hey,it's MY life and they don't have to live with the consequences of MY choices,as long as I am happy and I have lots of love to give then I will stick two fingers up to the rest of the world, enjoy myself and never look back!!! :dance:
     
  11. katastrophic

    katastrophic Well-Known Member

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    Lauramum01 is right, I'm 27 and I have found them both patronising and rude at times, its my first pregnancy and I have had very little help or support thats why I am so glad to have found this site, I think a lot of hospitals dont have the resources to give new Mum's the help and support they need, they don't seem to appreciate how scary it can be no matter what your age! My sister was nineteen when she had her first and was treated with an amazing amount of respect by her local hospital, she is quite a strong character though so she probably demanded it!

    I don't think twenty one is too young at all, don't let people make you believe otherwise, as long as you have lots of love to give that little one and money to put food in its belly then its more than most seem to be able to offer these days and at a far greater age than twenty one.

    By the looks of this site there are plenty of people to give you a group hug and a bit of advice when needed. I'm a first time 'Mum to be' and terrified and excited and don't know what help I can offer but if you need any advice or a bitch and moan then give me a shout!!!

    Take care of yourself and bump!

    Kat x
     
  12. prickleyfairy

    prickleyfairy Well-Known Member

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    Hi,

    Welcome to the forum.........and congratulations on your pregnancy!!!!!!!!!

    Amy xx
     
  13. Jaidy

    Jaidy Well-Known Member

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    Hi hun,

    Im 20 and trying for a baby...I have had some well bad reactions but to be honest I try not to worry cos im happy and ready for a family and know it will having a loving, caring, mummy and daddy. I dont think age is a factor, so long as you are happy like I said and can provide for your baby then go for it!! Nothing wrong with young or old mothers, all are fab :D
     
  14. BubbleOne

    BubbleOne Well-Known Member

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    Hello and welcome to the forum :lol:

    Sorry to hear you feel you are being 'judged' because you will be a youngish Mum.

    I was 22 when I had Phoebe and I have to say it has been a very positive experience. I hope it is for you too :lol:
     
  15. claireabell

    claireabell Well-Known Member

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    I was 20 when I gave birth to my first daughter...she arrived 3 weeks before my 21st and I found some people to really look down their noses at me. I am now 30 and pregnant with my second child. Although I'm 10 years older my circumstances are a bit c**p at the minute and still find people look down their noses at you. My advice is as long as you love your baby with all your heart then stuff what they think. Sometimes life doesn't always go as we planned...mine certainly hasn't but I have so much love for my daughter and my new baby that's all that matters. You will learn how to be as each day passes and I'm sure you'll make a lovley mummy.

    Take care and hope everything goes well for you... :)
    xxxxxx
     
  16. Tam

    Tam Well-Known Member

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    Hi,

    Welcome to the forum and CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!! :dance:

    As for being too young, I was 21 when I had my first and we did OK, she is a lovely little girl and I didnt have a clue when I had her.....I learnt along the way, as we all do regardless of age!!

    I had my baby in Norfolk, but in Gt Yarmouth at St James Paget and the care and the respect I got there was second to none, I wished I could have my second there.........I was spoilt! :) But I know it's too far from Norwich for convenience, especially if you have to do the journey in labour :cry:

    Anyway hun, I hope the sickness starts easing for you now, hang on in there hopefully it will soon pass now.

    Wishing you a very healthy & happy pregnancy!! xx
     
  17. kirlykird

    kirlykird Well-Known Member

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    I don't believe that age is a problem as long as it is thought through and wanted and loved.

    I was 19 when I had my twins and it wasn't planned but my partner and I made the best of it!

    Now I look back without any regret asI have so far had 8 years full of love, cuddles and kisses and to me it just means having them young enables me to spend more of my life with them!

    Good luck and take no notice of those who look down their noses at you!

    x
     
  18. Fingers crossed

    Fingers crossed Well-Known Member

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    Hi, good luck with your pregnancy. Sorry about the hard time you've been having, people shouldn't judge others because of age or anything. What I hate is when watching birth programs and the midwives talk to the mums like they're little kids, like "good girl" etc. I'd find that really annoying and patronising :x
     

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