Health visitor made me feel crap

Discussion in 'Third Trimester' started by Sully2012, Jan 25, 2012.

  1. Sully2012

    Sully2012 Well-Known Member

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    Omg had the most awful experience. A man phoned last week to book an appt which was today for himself and a lady to introduce themselves. Well......all I can say is I am glad my OH was there as had I told him about it he would prob ask if I was just been over sensitive!!!!!! It started off ok and then......the lady asked if the baby was planned (baby was not planned) I said no but said she was a very nice surprise (i never used the word accident) to which she replied oh so if she was an accident is this baby wanted or just that u didn't believe in termination?? What a bitch. Then out came the breastfeeding pack and basically was told every woman can breast feed they just need to keep trying, erm not every woman can and if I can't then I will bottle feed as not going to stress baby and I out. The man just sat there and when she got a bit feisty shall we say he just did a pathetic cough and shuffled. Then they gave me a pack with all this stuff ticked, I said "you have not spoken about all this stuff you have ticked, signed and dated" she said we are running late today so we will try and discuss at another time. So y the f*** tick, sign and date it then. I burst into tears when they left as I am having this baby because I want to what right did she have to ask if I'm just pregnant because I don't believe in termination, at 33 weeks I love my baby stupid woman. I am so angry. My OH was open mouthed and disgusted with her, so much so he phoned the health centre and complained. The man phoned us back and apologised and said his colleague was sorry she was just stressed. Silly woman didn't even phone herself. Sorry for rant just really hate her.
     
  2. tillzy69

    tillzy69 Well-Known Member

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    What a bitch! How rude! Hope I don't have someone like that i'll end up giving em a slap! And it doesn't matter if she was stressed its her job at the end of the day and if shes going to treat people like that just because shes had a hard day then maybe she needs to rethink her career choice!!
     
  3. leannesxb

    leannesxb Well-Known Member

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    that is disgusting what a horrible woman. Think she would have been shown the door very very quickly!!!
     
  4. l_maclean

    l_maclean Well-Known Member

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    Oh my god!!! thats awful. :hugs: glad your OH was there to see it himself and that he complained.

    I understand why they recommend breast feeding, and have to ensure that people have thought through things properly - but surely they must realise that "forcing" it is not gonna help.

    Absolutely no excuse for any of the rest of that though. I hate when they try to sign to say they've done something and they havent - thats just laziness!! xxx
     
  5. x_larlybelle_x

    x_larlybelle_x Well-Known Member

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    Oh the bitch.

    Glad u complained, make sure u send somethin in writing as well tho. A phonecall from her colleague is not what I would call an apology xx
     
  6. LoopyLouize

    LoopyLouize Well-Known Member

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    What a bitch!! That is disgusting and well done you and your OH for complaining about her! People like her need knocking down a peg or too!

    Hope you feel better now xx
     
  7. Sully2012

    Sully2012 Well-Known Member

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    Thanks ladies I'm going to have a take away for tea and cuddle up with OH all eve. He said we are not having her as our HV so feel better. I will get something in writing don't worry about that and OH told the bloke to get her to apologise herself. Seeing mw tomorrow so will tell her what a cow I had. U know what our hormones are like but I would never take it out on a professional they should have the same view with patients. Thanks for messages :) xx
     
  8. BabyBrain

    BabyBrain Well-Known Member

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    When I get a HV I'm going to be recording our convo, as long as I tell them first it's legal lol. Have a nice chilled evening with your OH xxxxxxxxxxx
     
  9. Sully2012

    Sully2012 Well-Known Member

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    Babybrain lol might wear a wire at all future appointments x
     
  10. mustard

    mustard Well-Known Member

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    I don't normally use internet/ text speak but OMG!!! Can't believe a 'professional' would behave like that.
     
  11. cosmicgirl

    cosmicgirl Well-Known Member

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    What an absolute bitch, I'd have booted her out! :hugs: xx
     
  12. Sully2012

    Sully2012 Well-Known Member

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    I know what a bitch
     
  13. JJ Mum

    JJ Mum Well-Known Member

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    Oh my god! that's shocking ........... Well done you two for ringing up and complaining. I didn't think HV's went round in two's? I bet she was in training, esp as he coughed to move her on during the conversation. Even if they have set questions, there is a way , (a bedside manner) of asking them in a better way (a human way!) Think she needs a bit more role play to practice - ha !

    I would get her name and then follow up in writing too, then it will go down on record as your phone call won't. Follow the letter up if it doesn't get a response within the next 2 weeks.
     
  14. Mrs. KM

    Mrs. KM Well-Known Member

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    Wow that is awful! I am glad your OH phoned and complained!
     
  15. Olive

    Olive Well-Known Member

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    That's appalling. Glad you complained. X
     
  16. Sully2012

    Sully2012 Well-Known Member

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    Thanks everyone :) x
     
  17. Applecider

    Applecider Well-Known Member

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    I am so disappointed when I come across people like that, they need to change their profession! Hope your ok hun, don't let people get you upset xx
     
  18. Verity2011

    Verity2011 Well-Known Member

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    That's dreadful hon! You poor thing! Really not what you need when heavily pregnant. Glad you both complained x
     
  19. mummy2b73

    mummy2b73 Well-Known Member

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    Wow....what an awful experience glad you complained she really needs pulling up about her attitude.
    I must admit I am quite worried about the HV visit my brother in law was telling me about his visit the other week and saying theirs was asking some really probing and personal questions and made excuses to leave the room alone and have a look in other rooms in the house......I know they have a duty to support families who may need more help and protect children but I really don't think that they should tar everyone with the same brush. I am sure there are some really nice professional health visitors out there just hope mine is one of them because I will probably be on my own when they come and reading threads from other people over the past few weeks I don't think your experience is an isolated one unfortunately.
     
    #19 mummy2b73, Jan 26, 2012
    Last edited: Jan 26, 2012
  20. mishi

    mishi Well-Known Member

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    Sorry to butt in but nosing in other areas this morning as not much going on in Tri 1 yet today!

    Ticking boxes and signing and dating to say these things have been discussed is falsifying records and she could be in serious trouble with the NMC for that. I'm a nurse manager and if one of my staff did that for one of our patients their head would be on the chopping block.

    Appalling way for you and OH to be treated and she shouldn't get away with it! I'd definitely be writing a formal letter of complaint.
     

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