Funny things your children have said to you 8-)

[mamichuli]

One day recently my nine year old, Vic started a question to me that went like this:

Mom, when you were little and everything was black and white films...

god - i know I am old - but that old.

Then of course there is the time just after I separated from my ex, my fifteen year old was then ten; i was on a visit to the uk and went into Marks and Spencers and was buying underwear for me, and decided to splash out a little and get myself something pretty, to cheer me up - I asked her what she thought of something and this was her answer:

"Yeah, Mum, really pretty but i dont see why you are buying pretty undies if, now that you're not with Daddy, no one will ever see it again!

How kids make you feel better!

Lisa

 

[Squiglet]

8/9 is a great age....they are old enough to know thing but don't really understand them...so the come to their ow conclusions. Tia says loads of funny things...I wish I had a camera trained on her to capture those moments.

We were messing around the other day and saying we were going to have another baby...to which she announced to DH..."Dad, thats not right is it...because you used up all your tadpoles making Serena, didn't you?!"

We've also started calling the baby heffalump... to which Tia said... "you can't call her a heffalump...she doesn't have green hair and orange skin!" It took me a few moments to realise she was talking about....

UMPA LUMPAS....

 

[mamichuli]

My OH has just reminded me of another couple of beauties. As some of you know my son Vic rides a dirt bike, and having a young petrol head in the family has its own pitfalls. We always stop and look at bikes in bike shops, as we are all crazy about bikes. We were looking at a Yamaha MT01, for those of you who are not familiar with the world of biking, it is a very big bike - and my nine-year-old announced "Wow that IS a BIG MUMMY!
He went on to say that he had seen a bike going very fast and that the rider was "giving it some willie!"

 

[sazzylou]

He went on to say that he had seen a bike going very fast and that the rider was "giving it some willie!"

That cracked me up....

Beths done so many, i cant remember them all now.


We were in Tescos the other night and she kept picking up things that she wanted. She got most of the stuff she asked for but in the end i had to put my foot down. She got a bit stroppy so i said "do you pay for the shopping?? well until you do you need to put that back" to which she shouted "You dont pay for it either, Daddy does. You dont even have a JOB!!" which is fair enough really, lol.

When she was younger we were using a public loo, and she caught sight of my lady parts She thought all your down below bits (front and back) were called a bum, so she starts shouting "MUMMY! WHY IS YOUR BUM SO HAIRY?? YOU HAVE A HAIRY BUM MUMMY!!!" the more i tried to ssshh her, the louder shje got and i could hear people laughing outside the cubicle

 

[MissSara]

Well i was making the beds upstairs and Harrison was pottering round the living room.
I heard someone shouting outside " ANY OLD IRONNNN" " ANY OLD IRON"
it was a man going round wanting all the scrap metal on the back of a van, he normally drives round about once a month.

Anyway Harrison must have heard him and looked out and seen his van, so he came running up the stairs with MY OLD IRON, shouting that man is asking for our old iron mummy shall i go and give it him......

I had to sit down to stop myself falling over with laughter and then explain to a confused 6 year old what he wanted..........lol

 

[newmum]

love it

 

[x0xbaybeeemz]

He went on to say that he had seen a bike going very fast and that the rider was "giving it some willie!"

That cracked me up....

Beths done so many, i cant remember them all now.


We were in Tescos the other night and she kept picking up things that she wanted. She got most of the stuff she asked for but in the end i had to put my foot down. She got a bit stroppy so i said "do you pay for the shopping?? well until you do you need to put that back" to which she shouted "You dont pay for it either, Daddy does. You dont even have a JOB!!" which is fair enough really, lol.

When she was younger we were using a public loo, and she caught sight of my lady parts She thought all your down below bits (front and back) were called a bum, so she starts shouting "MUMMY! WHY IS YOUR BUM SO HAIRY?? YOU HAVE A HAIRY BUM MUMMY!!!" the more i tried to ssshh her, the louder shje got and i could hear people laughing outside the cubicle

love it!! Musta been embarsessing

 

[Kylie1007]

When I was on my teaching practice, one thing that stands out is a 9/10 yr old child asking how to spell f**k!!! WHAT???!!!
She said "I know how to spell Nor...but don't know to spell f**k."

 

[Slinky Sarah]

When I was on my teaching practice, one thing that stands out is a 9/10 yr old child asking how to spell f**k!!! WHAT???!!!
She said "I know how to spell Nor...but don't know to spell f**k."

OMG!!!

My brother once herd a song when he was little ad it had a line in like 'if i can help'...now its quite fast in the song and he would sing it as friggin hell! needless to say mum pulled him up on it lmao!!!

I used to call bras boobie pouches!! dont have any idea where that came from but it is logical in a way!!

 

[SarahH]

Years ago when my nephew was getting sex-ed at school asked me so innocently

"Auntie Sarah, How does the sperm know if the men and woman are married"

Know he is 14 - I like to wind him up on it!

 

[mum2A&L]

my brother YEARS ago - we went out for dinner, and he ordered an apple pie for his desert. Well he took one bite and started bawling.. it took us ages to calm him down enough for him to tell us whats wrong:




"i don't like it.. its got apples in it"



(he always has the little apple pies with no lumps and this had lumps, but the way he said it had us in fits!!).

Even to this day, we still take the mick!

 

[evemarie8]

When my sister and I were younger we went on a family holiday to cornwall or devon, anyway we went to a resturant and Snail (thats my sister) ordered fish and chips and when it came it was obviously really fresh and she turned to my mom and said "Mommy, this smells like its not even dead yet!". She was about 4!

 

[bunnymom1980]

A couple of weeks ago my 10 year old told me not to worry about the birth because he's seen enough on TV to be able to deliver the baby!

I really must monitor this childs TV viewing

 

[keeley]

Years ago, my little sister came home from school and said "I learnt a new word for DOWN THERE in Welsh today" pointing to her lady bits.

When my mum asked her what it was, she said................

























Bladder!

 

[Becky]

We were visiting a friend the other week and his mum was there - we've known the family since I was tiny but I hadn't seen the mum for a while so we were catching up. Lucy started talking about my parent's dog Ben and I asked what colour Ben is (as you do when they're learning colours etc.) and Lucy said "Ben is black and Pink". I said "No, Ben is black and has a white tummy".

"No Mummy, Ben has has a pink willy"


I looked at our friend's mum and we both just laughed!

 

[fuffins1981]

My son is terrible!

Once on the bus, he started telling a man about my ex Stuart: ' Mom used to have a boyfriend named Stuart. They had an argument and now he hates her'

(This relationship was long past. Stu was in the army in Germany)

Then he went on to say: 'She now has a boyfriend named Ian. And Alex lives with us'

(Alex is my brother)

I tried to explain to the man, as I felt like a raging slag....'You don't need to explain your love life to me sweetheart' was his response. The smug look on his face made me realise he had not belived a word I had said!

I am lucky I am black, as I would have blushed the colour of beetroot. I could have died

Even now, he tells people about Stuart. If me and OH split up, I think I will remain single to maintain some dignity!!

 

[elaine22]

When I was on my teaching practice, one thing that stands out is a 9/10 yr old child asking how to spell f**k!!! WHAT???!!!
She said "I know how to spell Nor...but don't know to spell f**k."

Lol. My ex's auntie is a primary school teacher and once she showed us a note she'd caught a 10 YEAR OLD boy passing to a girl. It read, 'Please will you go out with me? All the mother-f***ing love in the world, Ben xx'


How romantic!

 

[chickadee1976]

My son reckons that i will only be able to breast feed if its a girl as boys dont have boobs ???? Logic

 

[sazzylou]

My son reckons that i will only be able to breast feed if its a girl as boys dont have boobs ???? Logic

that really cracked me up for some reason

 

[fran_23]

hehe i cant wait for hayden to say some really funny stuff to me-
mind you hes pretty entertaining now the other day i was on the phone and he said "mumma i'm making din dins" i asked what he was making and he said "pizza" bless him i found that nice because hes not long been talking in proper full sentences so its a novelty!
but he said something that cracked me up the other day- every morning he says to me "wheres dadda, dadda gone work" hes began using that as a way to explain everyones absence ie "nannas at work" round my mums i said to him wheres trixie (the cat) he looked under the table and didn't see her so announced "trixies gone to work" the image of the cat on the building sight cracked me up!!