Fool me once, shame on me. *Long post*

[eb93]

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[wifeywifey]

Aww hun what an awful situation to be in. Only you know if you can forgive him tho. You are not over reacting at all. My opinion is that you should at least get some space but I personally wouldn't worry as much about the kiss but that they appear to have been discussing him leaving you for her. Ps im not a single mum but when lo is born being a single parent living eith your mum having loving famil around isnt as bad as you think it sounds.

 

[eb93]

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[wifeywifey]

Have you asked him these questions? Im sure he didn't plan it but doesn't mean its ok. The chances are he doesn't know. He may have deleted his Facebook but he still works with her and will dee her most days. You need to speak to him hun tell him if he doesn't be honest he has no chance. Im sorry you are dealing with this and no matter what you will be a fantastic mum. Take a step back, a rest and a breather then ask yourself in time can you ever trust him. X

 

[Beckyb1991]

Didn't want to read and run... what a disgusting 'man'. stand by your guns babe because he's no good for you. Once a cheat always a cheat. xxxd

 

[roxie2011x]

He sounds vile and you sound like I did a few short weeks ago.. my babys dad left me and beleive me I know how much of an easier life u think u will have by forgiving him and sweeping this under the carpet.. these type of men are discusting and no matter how much of an awful situation u think u r in.. u must look further than these next few months. . This time nxt year where do u want to be? Can u see ureself forgiving him completely? Otherwise it will hang over u like a black cloud and u need to be realistic and realise u wont be truly happy unless there's trust.. can u seriously trust this person after hes treated u like this? The most special supposed to be happy time of ur life??? Bin him!! U can do it and when u feel like u cant picture your childs face looking back at u who do u want them to see? I have dark days and picturing my son looking upto him mummy a strong woman who respects herself and knows to be a good mum means being in a good place yourself, setting an example on what is an appropriate way to treat other people! I used to think im pregnant I cant do this but use it to ur advantage. . Turn to hat baby wen u need strength.. good luck xx

 

[Demaris]

This man is not on an emotional level to support you and a child. You are feeling very vulnerable now, not just for you but for your unborn child.

My ex husband left me (for the local barmaid) when my children were 2 and 1, we had a mortgage and I had to give up work and the house because I couldnt meet the payments-I ended up going back to my mum and dads till I got myself on my feet. That was 12 years ago and I can honestly say it was the best thing that could have happened looking back.

One thing I learnt about all that (and you will too when baby is born) is that my resolve was stronger because of the children. I was like a lion mummy and no one was gonna mess around with us neither in an emotional way or a physical way. I rented a house, I was on benefits at first but slowly got myself back together, found a job and one step at a time it all worked out.

This commitment he has promised you, is supposed to be not just for you but for your baby too-his actions havent really matched his words so far. You CAN do it on your own, because the love you feel for your baby will give you all the strength you need.

I think you are right to cut him out right now, for your sake and for the sake of keeping stress down. He clearly can't refuse attentions from women right now, which when its a time he should be focused on you just shows how immature he actually is.

Hang in there, things will turn out for the best. Your fighting spirit will get stronger once baby is born xx

 

[Browneyed Girl]

I don't think you can trust this man as far as you can throw him. He was already on his last chance and I would be suspicious as to whether he has told you the whole truth - if he's only kissed this woman why was she discussing him leaving you? It sounds like the 'relationship' had gone further than he is admitting. As for spending money on nights out with her when you were saving up for your baby, I would be absolutely fuming about this as well! The fact that he already has a child and is behaving this way shows that it's not some reaction to the prospect of settling down and being a dad as he already has these responsibilities. I think you have to think about whether you believe him 100% and whether you could ever trust this man to put you and your child first. Good luck xx

 

[eb93]

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[Flickalicious]

Your story sounds familiar to my own and im glad you've found strength in your decision.
Im now married to the man who cheated on me when pregnant (and after birth) with our son and im now carrying our second child. Its easy to say get rid sometimes but I loved this man and couldn't be without him despite the torture he put me through. Whether that makes me weak as a woman or strong as a couple I don't know and frankly, I dont care because right now we're happy and looking forward, not back. I will never forgive what he did, I just look past it.
I hope this man thinks hard about his actions because they are unforgiveable and i hope you continue to have a healthy pregnancy. Stay strong. Things will get better in time xXx

 

[JD.Deedee]

What a disgusting man! It's just the one thing that makes me blood boil, doing such a thing to the mother of your child. My uncle did this for 7 years straight before finally going to the other woman. His excuse was his daughter growing up in a 'normal' family. So much got broken, friendships, family connections because he CHOSE to treat his wife, the mother of his daughter like this. And the divorce hasn't been pretty..

I'm glad you're a strong woman and you're not going to budge, you'll find someone so much better it may be tough but it will be tough anyway and it's better to know where you're at than be at this again in 5-10? years maybe sooner.. Someone who can't be honest and can be such a two faced liar can't change, won't change and is simple a broken plate fixed, but not how it was when it was new. Keep strong and you and your little one will be fine! x

 

[ema-lou24]

Aw hun I'm so sorry to read about what this pathetic excuse for a man has done to you and your unborn child.

Going by my past experience of this, my ex husband cheated on me while I was pregnant and even the night I had our son, he went home to her...I didn't find any of this out until my son was about 8 months old when he left her saying he wanted to make a go of it with his wife despite telling her he wanted to leave me and start a house and family with her...

Anyways, for 6 months I tried to forget about it and make it work more so for the sake of our son, I couldn't forgive him though as it wasn't so much him having sex with her it was the lies he told me and the nights he missed out on his sons development so that he could meet her that tore me up inside the most. When I look back I was a single mum from day one despite "living" with this man. So much so when I finally left him, he had to ring my friend and ask how to make up a bottle as he had never done it before.
Some people can work past adultery, and I have the biggest respect for them that they can do that. I personally can't and can't even imagine sharing a bed with a man who is or has done all that behind my back.
I was 20 years old with a 2 year old and a single mum. My ex husband was also abusive and even leaving him didn't stop him from bringing me down mentally and physically, saying no man will ever love me as I'm used goods etc, that sort of thing. It was hard and when I look back I don't know how I managed it, but when I look at what I have now, I'm so glad I didn't "settle" with him just cos he was father to my child.
I am now with my loving fiancé (who pushes my buttons but would never hurt me physically or mentally), he's been hurt and cheated on in past relationship so knows how it feels so would never do that to someone, esp the mother of his children. He took on my son as his own, gave me our daughter and now carrying his son, we have a nice home together etc.
Things seem really shit for you just now, but it's only temporary. You will get back on your feet, with or without him, cos despite what I say, u can't help who u fall in love with and if he's for you then go for it, but don't feel you "have" too due to carrying his child.
You will look back in a few months even years and it will all be a distant memory. Things will work out. But only you can make them happen sweetie and only you can make the choices.
Much love to you. It's not a nice position to be in xx

 

[xxheyxx]

Hi I'm new to this. Need some support. Me and my partner have tried for this baby. Just found out 2 days ago that I am pregnant. He reacted in a happy way. Last night he was distant and said he can't do this. But wants to be with me. I am so hurt and confused. I don't know what to do or who to turn to

 

[mrssmith2011]

hi there has he given you any reason for what he said? Maybe he just feels a little overwhelmed. I would try to talk to him to get to the bottom of it. Good luck xxx