finding it all so hard

Discussion in 'Pregnancy Chat' started by E44girl, Mar 7, 2016.

  1. E44girl

    E44girl Member

    Joined:
    Feb 29, 2016
    Messages:
    22
    Likes Received:
    0
    Hi all, as the title says im finding this so hard, I'm 6 weeks today.
    My ex partner is no where to be seen! To be perfectly honest he pushed for a baby but then was cheating on me, we split up before I knew, but I have told him and has blocked me on everything after telling me he would be at every appointment.
    Only other person I have told is my one my closet friends who's also male, but he got all wound up with me and now doesn't want to speak to me, I think it's because he has wanted me for a long time and hates my ex so has become jealous of this.
    I've become so emotional and I'm crying all the time which isn't me, I know it's part of my hormones right now but I'm finding it hard to cope.
    Among that my parents are going through a split themselves and my father and I don't speak but are living under same roof right now due to my split.
    Just feel so stuck :'(
     
  2. fairyprincess

    fairyprincess Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 28, 2015
    Messages:
    2,969
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gosh you've got a lot going on you poor thing! Firstly, your hormones are going to be all over the place so you're going to be finding it extra difficult to deal with stuff. If your partner was cheating on you then he doesn't deserve to be in your life. You will be a good Mum on your own and perhaps confide in another friend who you know will be a bit more supportive x
     
  3. flexilexi394

    flexilexi394 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jun 29, 2010
    Messages:
    7,045
    Likes Received:
    5
    Hello! It's so hard when you feel alone isn't it, my mum and dad decided to get a divorce right at the time I fell pregnant with my first too and my daughter has never met her real dad (she's 5 now) so you sooo can do it but I know how you feel. This forum helped me through all of it to be honest xxx
     
  4. E44girl

    E44girl Member

    Joined:
    Feb 29, 2016
    Messages:
    22
    Likes Received:
    0
    Thanks both, it's my first pregnancy so I'm nervous anyways.
    I'll be telling my mother in 2 weeks as it's her birthday and I know she will be over the moon! It's so hard everything seems to be happening at once. And I am one who had never grown up around younger children, so it's all totally knew to me, I'm 28 and held a baby twice in my life. My ex was all for it as he has younger family members and I'm fairness he always helped out. But now he has gone out of his way to find single mothers rather than focusing on his own unborn.
    I have a good friend who is also a single mum and I know she would be supportive. It's just so hard trusting after all that's happened this last couple of months :( xx
     
  5. Rubyredslipper

    Rubyredslipper Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 24, 2016
    Messages:
    511
    Likes Received:
    40
    Oh I'm sorry sweet, you've got a right plateful haven't you?! Your main focus needs to be on baby now so try not to get worried or stressed.
    I found this forum really helpful and supportive in my early weeks when I didn't want to tell anyone so use it and ask anything you need to, rant etc theres always someone to talk to! xx
     
  6. SiameseCatLady

    SiameseCatLady Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 26, 2014
    Messages:
    734
    Likes Received:
    2
    You're very brave and going through a lot!
    Ask your midwife if there is a group called Pregnancy in Mind in your area. It's a group for pregnant ladies who have a lot of stuff going on and who are feeling low and anxious. I am starting mine in Monday - I'll try to remember to let you know how it goes and share some ideas if I can. Xx
     
  7. Phoenix85

    Phoenix85 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 7, 2013
    Messages:
    1,305
    Likes Received:
    0
    Hi.

    I would join as many antenatal groups (and later, mum & baby groups) and get some support that way.
    Definitely speak to your midwife and see if there is single parent support in your area (Gingerbread for instance, some areas have additional support/mums groups too).


    I'm in a similar position as I'm pregnant and the baby's dad is not around. We 'split' before I found out I was pregnant (though were were never officially together). And since I told him he has said he wants to be involved but then he never messages me. I messaged him again a few weeks ago and he ended up admitting he'd been ignoring [the pregnancy] and apologised and said he would talk to me more, make time to see me etc, and "man up" (his words), but that was over 2 weeks ago and he's not contacted me since. I am always the one to send him a message and start a conversation, try to arrange to meet up etc, and then he either doesn't reply or he replies but is brief or just says he's busy etc and doesn't make any effort. It's frustrating.

    I'm 30 though and I have two older children who are 11 and 9 and I split up with their dad when my youngest was 21 months, so I'm used to going it alone, although my older kids' dad is very involved with them and sees them regularly.
     
  8. E44girl

    E44girl Member

    Joined:
    Feb 29, 2016
    Messages:
    22
    Likes Received:
    0
    Thanks all, I meet my midwife next week so I'll ask about the group's.
    All I have done lately is sit and cry, went to drs yesterday and they took bloods and samples and think I know have an infection of some kind to add to my ever growing list :( so waiting on results for that too.
    Never a full moment
     
  9. Blueclass

    Blueclass Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2015
    Messages:
    2,139
    Likes Received:
    1
    He sounds pretty rubbish and i feel for you but your main focus needs to be you and your baby. I'm not saying it's easy but plenty of people do it on their own and manage and have perfectly happy children. I'm sure once you tell your mum you will feel like a weight has been lifted and you will feel like you got more support. Good luck in your pregnancy x
     
  10. SiameseCatLady

    SiameseCatLady Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 26, 2014
    Messages:
    734
    Likes Received:
    2
    Hi. Pregnancy in Mind was good. I enjoyed it and it helped to discuss things and to find ways of relaxing. Definitely worth asking about. Xx
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice