feeling vulnerable.. as it's just so early..

Discussion in 'Pregnancy Chat' started by Melanie3103, Aug 2, 2013.

  1. Melanie3103

    Melanie3103 Well-Known Member

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    As well as not really feeling pregnant yet (on my other post), I don't feel like I can celebrate and sit back and really enjoy being pregnant. I desperately want to be able to enjoy the moment, but you read so much about the risk of miscarriage and how very early it is etc etc.

    I want to live in the moment and enjoy this precious journey, but I'm frightened to death something will happen.

    I have no reason to think something awful will happen - I'm fit n healthy, and no history of MC etc - just really apprehensive about it all. It's such a precious thing and so HUGE to get used to the idea, it's taking some adjustment and I sometimes feel as if I should've just in case...

    I wish I could just enjoy it... and stop worrying.. anyone else feel like this ??

    x
     
  2. Jojo84

    Jojo84 Well-Known Member

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    Honey I think everyone feels like this. You're not alone. I had a scan at 7 weeks and since then I just decided to sit back snd let it happen. Nom point stressing about it. Just try and relax and the weeks will fly by believe me
     
  3. stacesl3

    stacesl3 Well-Known Member

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    Hi Melanie

    I know exactly how you feel! I dont think it has really sunk in, only told one other person so far, I have wanted this for so long and was so worried that my age (41) would be a factor, but obviously not! I am 5 weeks now, I do worry about M/C too and with no real reason like yourself. I think its normal enough to worry like this though, it must be twice as bad for the ladies who have suffered m/c.

    Just try stay as positive as you can, thats what I do when any negative thoughts come my way, I refuse to allow them. Put a picture in your head of what you will be like at 6 months, 8 months...holding baby in your arms etc and hold on to that. Helps me anyway :)
     
  4. Lulubelle

    Lulubelle Well-Known Member

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    I think it is natural to worry, however (don;t take this the wrong way) forums like this add to the worry I think. A lot of people (not everyone of course!) have come one here either because they are first timers or they have had difficult pregnancies before, including MC. You also find out about things that you didn;t know which get you worrying.

    The thing is, there is practically nothing that you can do to prevent any of the bad things happening (and by the time you find out your are pregnant, the odds are pretty good for you!). I am of the state of mind that says if I can;t do anything about it, I don't worry about it. If I should be doing something then I'll try to do it but otherwise I generally have a positive frame of mind.
     
  5. leela78

    leela78 Well-Known Member

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    Hiya, I'm at 20 weeks now and have just started to feel pregnant and be able to relax a bit more. Till now I felt it was a total waiting game, waiting for bump, movement and the 20 wk scan. I did feel better after the 12 week scan and it has got better from there, I had 1 miscarriage before this one and it is a sad fact it happens but its not in the majority of cases.
    I read somewhere a 'mantra' that helped me about miscarriage, 'its possible but not probable'
    I think early pregnancy forums / boards while helpful and great to chat can be worrying as its where people go for support in hard times, also you only read bad stories in newspapers etc of early pregnancy and what can go wrong.. Its tough and hard to avoid.
    I'd say just try and hang in there and as each day passes the probability of something going wrong reduces, distraction was the only way I got through it, almost ignoring there was anything going on...take care.
    x
     
  6. Dotty_woman

    Dotty_woman Well-Known Member

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    Hi Melanie,
    I felt just like you and was scared something was going to happen all the time. I'm 42 and was scared by all the things associated with being pregnant and an older mum. I did have one early loss but on my second attempt I have taken as many steps as I can to keep me chilled out in this pregnancy. I had an early private scan at 9 weeks to confirm all was going OK. As I'm another 5 years older than you, I was also worried about the increased risk of Down's Syndrome but now I've had the Harmony test (non-invasive test to detect risk of DS) and am feeling really quite relaxed now. I'm not saying an early scan is right for everyone but it certainly helped to put my mind at rest for the sake of £80. The 12
    week and 20 week scan are great for giving you that extra reassurance too. Try not worry and remember it will only be a few weeks until your 12 weeks scan (subject to where you are in the world obviously)! xxx
     
  7. purplepebbles

    purplepebbles Well-Known Member

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    I completely feel like this! I can't relax totally as I think something is going to go wrong. It's only natural though, think you'll find a lot of people feel like this. But I agree with another poster that although these forums are great for support, it also opens your eyes to a lot of the bad stuff, which I'm trying to ignore! Xx
     
  8. Melanie3103

    Melanie3103 Well-Known Member

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    Thanks all - nice to know I'm not alone. Appreciate you all taking the time to reply. I'm sure I will get better, as you say, not a lot I can do about it. So I will try and relax about it all.

    xx
     

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